Nevertheless, should the games companies ever wish to lure people out of their hovels, and back into their sticky-carpeted, flea-invested, sub-sub-sub-Vegas, neon hellcaves, might we suggest that they look to the past for inspiration?
Here are ten weird arcade games that offer a mix of the surreal, the surreally mundane, and the utterly pointless...
Why was such a thing ever in the game in the first place? What exactly was the context? The game's English translation explains thusly: "A bad man appeared and stole the time key to stop the time flow".
The saucy entrance may have gone from the Japanese version, but plenty of other oddness remained intact. These pictures tell the rest of the story...
You see, succeeding at the game results in a reduced fee for using the washing machine component of the unit. We're not entirely sure what the big wheel is about, mind. Perhaps he was doing a Phd in fannying around on a yacht.
Unfortunately, this ancient Soviet arcade strength tester does little to dispel the stereotype, as it simulates the physical effort required to pull a giant turnip out of the ground.
Interestingly, Digitiser2000's Mr Biffo once visited former Soviet country of Ukraine, and lost count of how many little old women in headscarves and wellington boots, wandering around with chickens under their arms, he saw. And before you say anything, that's not even racist; that's just how he saw it (through his racist eyes).
Around the same time, Sega released another ticket-dispensing game called Cut The Cheese, in which players had to roll coins into a lavatory bowl... which proves to be an apt metaphor for the company's fortunes in recent times.
Which, frankly, is a bit like trying to jazz up tennis by handing out fireworks to the spectators, and asking if they could throw them onto the court throughout the match, while farting into kettles.
One has to wonder what sort of message they were trying to convey to their clientele; it's a bit like installing a bus driver-stabbing arcade game at a bus stop, and giving successful players free bus travel.
Let's face it: nobody was crying out for a Metal Gear arcade game, any more than they wanted, say, a Half-Life 2 arcade game...
Despite the first-person shoot 'em up genre being fairly unpopular in Japan, Half-Life 2: Survivor was designed to try and boost its popularity. Loosely speaking the same game that was originally available on PCs, Survivor was given a splash of arcade-like flash, and utilised a peculiar control system that used double joysticks and floor pedals.
Let's face it: nobody was crying out for a Half-Life 2 arcade game, any more than they want an arcade game based upon the simple smartphone game Jetpack Joyride...
If you want some idea of what this was like, press reveal to see the comedian Bobby Davro playing a UK version of this game.