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XBOX ONE: THE RED WHIFF OF DEATH by Mr Biffo

2/4/2015

21 Comments

 
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Just before Digitiser began, in the year 84BC, we made a choice not to review Amiga games. 

As you might expect, it wasn't a popular decision with Amiga owners, whose ire we further stoked by calling them idiots when they wrote in to complain (like the idiots they were... TROLLLLLL).

However, there was more to it than simply dismissing the format outright on a whim: between the team, we already had a Mega Drive and a Super NES - the two main formats at the time - so it was easy to review games for them. 

Plus, we'd been struggling to get PR people to take us seriously enough to send us review copies. "You're a video games magazine on Teletext?" they'd cough, before swearing and hanging up to snort some more cocaine. 

We eventually managed to do a deal with a console game importer, who had a shop in Park Royal (trivia: it's now a Kosher butchers); in return for a plug at the bottom of our reviews, they'd provide us with games (which we had to give back after a time). 

However, they didn't sell stuff for anything except the main consoles. Crucially, they didn't sell games for the Amiga, the only other real format of the time (PC was still a slow-burning, esoteric curio back then). Additionally, Teletext wasn't prepared to buy us an Amiga anyway, because they hated us, so it was a no-brainer: we weren't going to review Amiga games. 

Today's Amiga? The Xbox One. Sort of. Ish. Allow me to elaborate.

THE REASONING
See, we reasoned that the Amiga was on its way out. Having launched in 1985, it was already eight years old by the time Digi launched, and it just wasn't sexy compared to the exciting new consoles. There was, frankly, a whiff of death about it... Death by Computer Boys.

You could see the sharks circling the Amiga - and, by extension, Commodore - in a similar way when Sega launched the 32X, and then the Saturn, and then the Dreamcast. Those machines were never going to succeed, because they arrived into the world with the world expecting them to fail. It was pretty obvious that Sega was flailing around like a squid in a bin, and just piling bad decisions atop one another, like a drunk setting up for a game of Jenga. 


See also: Atari - the Jaguar launch was the games industry's equivalent of getting diarrhoea on the way to climb Mount Everest, and having to turn back.

Far be it for me to say we were the best guys ever, but every single time we called it that a system or a company would fail - it ended up failing. Admittedly, that is because we were the best guys ever, but still... It pains me to say this, but I can see the shark fins approaching the Xbox One's liferaft...
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KNIVES OUT
Since before the Xbox One launched, the long knives were out, and Microsoft stumbled blindly onto them.

From the moment Microsoft put its foot in it with the assertion that the machine would need to be always online (before backtracking), to stubbornly persevering with the unloved Kinect hardware (before backtracking), to announcing that Rise of the Tomb Raider would be an Xbox One exclusive (which seemed to please nobody), there's been a sense of one misstep after another. 

Throw into this persistent rumours that Microsoft has toyed with the notion of selling off the brand to a third-party, and may yet do so (nobody wants to back a machine that its own manufacturer doesn't believe in),  and sales figures that demonstrate just how far it lags behind the PS4, and the relatively lukewarm reaction to the likes of Sunset Overdrive and Titanfall, it's impossible to ignore that familiar whiff of decay. 

What's worrying, is that once the slide begins it tends to prove virtually impossible to stop.

It's frustrating for me - I stubbornly loved the Xbox 360 despite not much liking the original Xbox, and despite everyone, in the early days, insisting it was a crap system. I stuck to my guns while harbouring a passionate hatred for the PlayStation 3. If there was a mutliformat title I wanted, I'd get it on the 360, and mostly keep the PS3 for Blu-Rays and Uncharted games. The one PS3 I ever bought sat behind the telly gathering dust for years at a time, while I went through three 360s over the course of the system's life (yeah, yeah... red ring of death - whatevs).

When it came to the new generation, it was the Xbox One I put my faith in, more out of sheer loyalty than any wrong-brained belief that I needed a Kinect 2.0. Yet somehow, things have now reversed - it's now the Microsoft machine that has moss growing on it, and it's the PS4 that I'm playing multiformat games on. Something has shifted.

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WHAT HAS SHIFTED, DEAR?
The games industry is different to how it was in Digi's heyday. That's obvious. 

Plus, the players are much bigger fish - Microsoft is one of the largest corporations in the world, it has sunk billions into the Xbox, and we can't see it giving up the fight in the immediate future. Not unless, as I fear might be happening, the belief that the Xbox One has failed becomes ingrained in the collective consciousness, and it becomes a self-perpetuating slide.

Nobody wants to back what they see as a busted horse - and unless people are backing the Xbox One, there's no way it's going to be able to reverse the public perception. It's a snowball effect, and unless something happens, there will come a tipping point.

At this stage, I'm not sure how many exclusives, how many big franchises - even Tomb Raider or Halo - it would take to reverse this downward trajectory, and pull the system back from the brink.

We're not at a point yet where the Xbox One is careening down a slope towards an inevitable oblivion, but it seems clear that the PlayStation 4 has a significant lead - not just in terms of sales, but in terms of how positively people see it - and the Microsoft system is teetering at the top of the precipice. 

I hope I'm wrong, and I hope it doesn't happen. The games market is better and stronger if there are competing systems, and gamers have a choice. And with Nintendo effectively giving up on the Wii U - let's face it, without Zelda coming this year, what is there on the horizon in 2015 to get excited about? - we need a Sony AND we need a Microsoft.

Then again, while I don't really, truly, want the Xbox One to stiff, I do love being proved right. So, y'know, swings and roundabouts, guy.

FROM THE ARCHIVE:
  • REVIEWS ARE STUPID by Mr Biffo
  • PHIL HARRISON: BETWEEN YOU AND ME by Mr Biffo

21 Comments
The Great Jim Dove
2/4/2015 09:13:26 am

I like to sniff my hands

Reply
MrPSB
2/4/2015 09:14:33 am

I'm sticking to my PC, it may be an expensive platform but I don't need any friends to have a good time, and I can't put a price on that.

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Super Bad Advice
2/4/2015 09:31:41 am

I pretty much agree. With the avalanche of cock-ups (all of them notably non-gamer friendly but very corporate) on the lead-up to launch I wasn't really endeared to the XBONE from the get go, Plus Sony seemed to genuinely be over its hubris from the PS3. The nail in the coffin though for me was MS forcing the cack-handed metro interface onto the 360 even though it was entirely unsuited to a non-touchscreen interface, then worse still shoving it full of adverts.

With their obvious desire to shove Windows onto the next Xbox and have it control everything (albeit in a really cheap, half-arsed way like the feed-through TV) but mainly for their benefit rather than for anything great for gamers, I just couldn't be arsed.

Also, it doesn't really fill you with inspiration when rather than bothering to design a bit of high-end media kit, they seem to have shoved the wires in a massive black shoebox and called it job done.

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Nick the Gent link
2/4/2015 09:36:56 am

Agree with your thoughts, Mr. Biff(o).

Launching a video games console is beginning to look like buying a football team - you either do it because you really love the club and its supporters and it's your "thing" (like Nintendo), or because you have deep pockets and are willing to sink tons of cash into it in hopes of recouping market share or at least getting your name in front of glistening eyeballs (Microsoft).

Also - thanks for the image of a squid in a bin.

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Mr Smith
2/4/2015 10:43:03 am

I think I agree... But to be honest, I'm finding it impossible to care about any of the current 3 big consoles. X1/PS4 have yet to receive a title I feel the need to own, and the WiiU's controller puts me right off.

Like MrPSB said, I'm going PC this gen. Which is weird, because I've never liked PC gaming. But with indie titles and DRM free sites like GOG, it's just easier guy. And cheaper.

Mainly though, my gaming laptop can be run through my HDTV via HDMI cable, exactly the same as a console can. So... Why do we need consoles again?

Back in the Windows 98 days, you couldn't plug one into a TV too easily, but now...

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kelvingreen link
2/4/2015 10:49:50 am

Love the Amiga. Hate the X-Box. Can't decide if I'm offended by the comparison.

WOZNIAK!

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CrispyF
4/4/2015 03:07:33 pm

Have the WOZNIAK! t-shirts been shipped from China yet?

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Dr Kank
2/4/2015 01:13:47 pm

The Amiga was a handsome looking machine. Oh man!

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Old Red
2/4/2015 01:23:20 pm

Having missed out on all the Wii games last generation, buying a WiiU has been the best decision I've made in yonks. I'm picking up a shed load of great games for peanuts, while the industry sorts itself out or crashes and burns in a massive flaming heap of chips and bits.

I've spent the past 5 years hoarding a ridiculous amount of video games in preparation for what I predict will be the great gaming apocalypse of soon (if not soon then just after soon). The way I see it, the gaming industry is more than happy to let old button mashers like me go and move into the digital only age. Microsoft were clearly eager to jump into online only, without taking in to account the large number of VGMs (video gaming monkeys, deal with it) that weren't prepared to follow. Who can blame them with all the clear abuse of online game pricing outside of steam.

It just seems that Sony are going to do it by taking everybody's money and then dancing round burning Xbones, naked, waving remasters and the occasional unfinished game about until we all leave the party and they can start afresh with noob VGMs who've never known what it's like to actually touch something for reals.

Look at me, I gone done a waffle.

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ChorltonWheelie
2/4/2015 02:45:27 pm

I thought you didn't cover the Amiga because you were idiots.

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MrDrinks
2/4/2015 03:55:50 pm

Don't forget the part of the Tomb Raider "exclusive" where they tried to fool people into thinking it was a proper exclusive then finally admitted it was only timed. Having to lie to your customers to drum up support for your console can't be a good sign.

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RealDude
2/4/2015 09:08:57 pm

All companies lie and the very smart companies survive it. Just look at Sony. Sony has lied about "The Last Guardian" for 6 years. And don't forget Killzone "The Halo Killer"...but they rebounded as Microsoft will.

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MrDrinks
4/4/2015 12:44:30 pm

What lies have been told about The Last Guardian? Unless Sony have announced an actual release date then I must have missed something. Calling Killzone a "Halo killer" is hardly a lie, was it better than Halo? Of course not, but even that's subjective. I'd be willing to bet money this will be the last xbox console under the Microsoft banner. Microsoft's main interests have always been obvious, use the xbox as a trojan horse to eventually get control of the living room and all the media played in it. Since this isn't exactly working out well there's only so much money they're going to sink into a gaming machine before looking to let someone else take over.

I'm not saying Sony and all the rest don't lie, but Microsoft did it in such an idiotic manner that it showed how little they think of the people who actually buy games for their console. It also stank of desperation to have an equivalent of Uncharted 4.

Adam Fun and the Jersey Girls
3/4/2015 02:40:51 am

I'd agree with you completely except I don't think the PS4 maintained its good-will momentum it had on release. Why? Sod all games to play on both platforms. I'm yet to buy either console and I can't see it happening any time soon. Are there really sod all games to play? Probably not, but there's nothing that makes me want to part with £xxx as of yet, and sadly even a new Uncharted or a new Halo isn't going to do it either.

I'm really struggling with modern gaming, nothing fills me with wonder any more and it'd take a new Deus Ex, Half-Life or Zelda to sort me out or maybe, just maybe, something that actually looks and feels new and neither the XBone or the PS4 have these (por moi).

The best thing going on in gaming at the moment is the return of Digitiser.

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Superbeast 37
3/4/2015 03:47:56 am

Curiously XO exclusive games outsold a number of critically acclaimed multi plat titles.

Check out the 100 best selling games in the UK last year.

Titanfall which granted was on PC too was right up there. Masterchief collection did exceptionally well for a HD remake.

Sunset Overdrive released at the end of the year outsold triple plat darling of the media/fan boys Dark Souls 2 despite that being released early in the year.

Ironically my XO is on all the time but never for gaming. I actually use it as a media centre integrated with my Sky box & home cinema system and using Kinect voice controls. Well that was what Microsoft wanted right.... but they need people buying games not watching TV.

I buy all multiplats on the most powerful platform as I've always done... Last gen it was my 360 and this gen my PS4. I have no brand loyalty.

I don't see Microsoft allowing it to die or selling it off though. They seem to be pushing hard with the Win 10 integration.

They need to stay with it to the end. If they make the Dreamcast mistake of releasing a new model early, consumers will inevitably wait for a more powerful PS5. Microsoft need to replicate everything Sony did to turn the PS3 disaster into a reasonable recovery and a generation winning PS4. Assuming we have another console generation....

Of course if we don't have another console generation (as we currently know it) MS need to use the XO to push Win 10 as the big gaming platform else they could find something like Steam OS snatching victory out from under their noses.

In that respect what do Sony have? The company is near bankrupt. The gaming division is keeping them afloat but they have all their eggs in the old console model basket which is either on its last breath or only has one more gen left at most...

Sony are the ones looking precarious.

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Superbeast 37
3/4/2015 03:56:47 am

Forgot to add, I think 10 to 15 years from now Sony will have absolutely no presence in the gaming market and Nintendo will be a software developer/publisher only.

Windows, Steam and perhaps Android or IOS will be the big players in gaming.

The hardware will work as PC's and phones do now. The OS is the king. Multiple companies release multiple competing hardware devices each year at various price points and power levels.

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Adam Fun Balls and the Cleptomaniacs
3/4/2015 11:15:17 am

I don't think that will happen and I also hope it won't happen, I've no love for Microsoft but Nintendo aren't going anywhere and Sony's only making money from it's games division. Mobile gaming is massive but it hasn't harmed console sales, why would that change? If anything, Google or Apple (and possible Valve) making a dedicated games console is more likely to upset the balance.

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Superbeast 37
4/4/2015 02:07:13 am

The days of 5 to 8 year hardware cycles are finished. Plenty of people will happily upgrade every couple of years. Money is being left on the table and it's only a matter of time before someone or something runs in to snap it up.

The phone market proves this. People will buy a new £500 smart phone every two years.

The idea of wanting to stick with a £300 console for 5 to 8 years is dead in the water.

Why do I want to play on a museum piece when I have money to upgrade? I'm not tolerating that because some kid can't afford to upgrade. Why do I have to buy the same obsolete (even on launch day) model as the kid when I can afford a premium model with a better GPU?

The average Gamer is a 20/30 something who can afford better. We buy a lot more games than poorer demographics too.

It is inevitable that you will see a flight of the most lucrative customers from fixed long cycle platforms to OS compatible platforms that see competing manufacturers releasing new products each year.

Whether it's Win 10 PC's, Steam boxes or some android based console it doesn't matter. The change will come. The OS will dominate.

Sony will go bankrupt and the studios sold off. Nintendo will pull out of hardware and be forced into a software only business.

Inevitable.

Jabberwoc
3/4/2015 07:07:55 am

I'm a casual gamer now because of my decrepitude. A £50 Xbox 360 and more free games than I can play on Xbox Live will do me. Xbox One can suck its own toes after covering them in Marmite.

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From The Magic Castle
3/4/2015 07:50:35 am

The PC is the past, present and future.

Reply
Jabberwoc.
17/4/2020 08:13:18 am

Goodbye, Gaming Mill.
💧💧💧

Reply



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