The history of the games industry is littered with the discarded, barren, husks of good intentions and bad ideas. Join us now as we step upon this carpet of flaking shells. A-crunch-a-crunch-crunch.
The device sold a mere 100,000 units, and was rightly considered an enfeebled vagary - with only two games ever being made specifically for it: Super Glove Ball and Bad Street Brawler. And as far as the latter goes, never has a game been more aptly named.
R.O.B. was an attempt to reposition the NES as a toy, rather than a console, following the video game industry crash of the early-1980s, a way to assuage the the concerns of a wary retail market.
In theory it was a nice idea - R.O.B. would stand in for a second player, or respond to on-screen commands - but never proved to be as popular as Nintendo intended. What didn't help is that many R.O.B. units developed a sort of rudimentary sentience, and vigorously rubbed their owners in the night.
The blurb on the box was almost as unwieldy as the device itself: "Developed to improve your skills, thus achieve higher scores for more excitement in video games".
When it did eventually reach the UK, its main selling point - watching TV on the bus - was a fallacy, throttled by the Game Gear's excessive battery demands, like it was the victim of a serial killer known as The Battery Strangler.
However, in typical Nintendo fashion, it was aimed primarily at kids - with a bunch of built-in mini-games.
One disturbing feature, which was stumbled upon by some of its users, was a hidden Easter egg; pressing the "Run" button while on one of menu screens would freeze the screen, and then replace it with a distressing image, and the message "Who are you running from?". Kids love that sort of thing.
Though the guts of the Mega Drive were largely the same as the Master System, the converter was essentially just an adaptor which allowed the old games (both on cartridge and card) to fit into the Mega Drive slot.
Nevertheless, not every game was compatible with it - and some owners were so disappointed that they shoved a pen inside themselves.
Nicely, a handful of GB games featured enhancements, or colour, when used with the Super Game Boy. For me, though, the main benefit was being able to actually see the Game Boy graphics for once, without making my eyes go "tender".
Which is a shame, as it was a great idea for its time: accessed via a device which plugged into the top of a Mega Drive/Genesis, it was a pay-to-look-at online service, through which customers could access games and demos, and get cheat codes and tips and that.
Good ideas don't always pan out though: the Sega Channel never really took off, criticised for its high subscription fees, and arriving at the bum-end of Sega's 16-bit journey. It lasted a mere four years. Apropos nothing, here's a funny noise: nnnng-gah-nnng-nah!
In typical Nintendo fashion, the main menu was presented in the form of a game, "The Town Whose Name Was Stolen" - for which the player could choose, and name, their own male or female avatar. I would've chosen the name "Bummo".
Ahead of its time, perhaps.
Nintendo hoped that it would lead to the development of new types of games - with an emphasis on creativity - but ultimately only ten were ever released for it. It also boasted slow and clunky internet access, that was a bit like dragging a hairy celebrity around a velcro factory.
Only 15,000 units were sold, making it one of Nintendo's biggest ever washouts.
The expansion "pak" was a memory upgrade, which promised better looking games, higher resolutions - and proved to be one of the more successful add-ons to feature on this list.
Perfect Dark, The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask and Donkey Kong 64 - which came bundled with the "pak" - are the most notable games to make use of it.
It was also compatible with a number of Game Boy Advance originals - including Pokemon Ruby and Sapphire, which gave the player "special berries". And we all like those don't we, kids?
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