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WOLFENSTEIN II: THE NEW COLOSSUS (PS4, PC, XBOX ONE - PS4 VERSION TESTED)

13/11/2017

54 Comments

 
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Do you know what I miss? I miss the days when Nazis were funny.

When I was a kid, all my favourite shows poked fun at Nazis; The Young Ones did a gag where Lenny Henry dressed up as a Hitler postman. The Pythons had a sketch where "Mr Hitler" ran in the North Minehead by-election. Heck, Spike Milligan was rarely out of a Hitler costume.

Even 'Allo 'Allo portrayed Nazis as bumbling idiots, backstabbing one another over a painting of The Fallen Madonna With The Big Boobies, which gets hidden inside a knackwurst sausage.

In a way, a lot of that felt like a post-WW2 exhalation of breath. By poking fun at Hitler, by turning him into a figure of mockery, it stripped him - and, by association, the Nazis - of power. Somewhere along the way, to a certain disenfranchised generation, Hitler's ideology became cool again.

Between the release of 2014's Wolfenstein: The New Order and the release of The New Colossus, Nazis stopped being comedy bad guys, and were exposed as a legitimate threat in the real world.
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SO RIGHT IT'S WRONG
Why, just this past weekend there was a far-right rally in Poland. Between 60,000 and 100,000 people took to the streets to call for a "white Europe". That's a whole lot of racists.

It isn't just Poland of course; far-right ideology is spreading across the world, and too many powerful people - politicians, the media - are willing to embrace it, or at least turn a blind to it, for ratings or votes.

For me, the thing that's scary is that the new Nazis look like regular people. They don't wear the funny uniforms, like the Nazis I grew up with. They don't goose-step around the place shouting "Sieg Heil!". They hide in plain sight, the vast majority disguised behind day jobs or media-friendly soundbites, which say just enough without actually saying what they really mean.

They piggyback on the genuine concerns and anxieties of regular people, those less politically motivated, who are simply looking out for themselves. Unfortunately, hidden behind those anxieties are many who genuinely would be fine with a return of gas chambers and labour camps. 

The scariest end-point scenario of this is what The New Colossus explores through the continuing adventures of BJ Blaskowicz; an America in the 1960s, after the Nazis won the Second World War by nuking New York into oblivion. 

​Somehow, this fictional, tongue-in-cheek scenario does a far more effective job of exploring the true nature of fascism than the recent Call of Duty: WW2.
RAMESES... COLOSSUS!
After a shaky start, I really grew to like Wolfenstein: The New Order, and The New Colossus is much the same... but probably takes even longer to start shining. Nevertheless, let's get a few positives out of the way so that I can spend the remainder of this review just moaning and complaining, because me so edgy:

1. No massive installation! I put the disc in and could play immediately!
2. It's a single-player-only game!
3. There are solid reasons to play through more than once (bonus "assassination missions" after the main story ends, and certain in-game choices that affect the story)...

Unfortunately, it feels like the game only really gets going in its second half - when you are asked to make a choice between three unique exoskeletons (a pair of telescoping legs, a harness that constricts your body, and one that lets you to slam through grates and enemies) which allow access to new areas of the levels. Even then, it still sort of slips back into the same rhythm, and the suits don't have as big an impact on the gameplay as I'd have wanted.

Part of the issue for me was a sort of conflict at the core of the game between stealth and all-out blasting. On the default difficulty and higher, this is a punishing game. You're encouraged to seek out enemy commanders - and execute them before they can raise the alarm, sending troops swarming your position. However, the actual gunplay feels more like the recent Doom reboot than anything - but Wolfenstein II doesn't seem to always allow for that.

Weapons - which can be upgraded using kits you find lying about - don't really favour sneaking around, and many of the bigger enemies can only be taken down by blasting away.

Additionally, the action is broken up with intermission stages set on a huge submarine base. Here you interact with your colleagues in the Resistance, embark on little side quests, hone your shooting in the shooting gallery, and set up the next main mission. However, the labyrinthine sub makes it hard to navigate, and it's never entirely clear where you're meant to be going next. It weakens the momentum.

Consequently, if this game was a movie there'd be big action sequences, followed by 15 minute-long scenes where the main character wanders around lost, while other people say hello to him. 
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WEIRD SHIFTS
The weird shifts in the gameplay are oddly indicative of the jarring narrative lurches in the storyline. The New Colossus tackles some heavy themes, but never quite seems to know whether to play things for laughs. 

That's not necessarily a criticism - it does a fine job of humanising its characters (there are grim flashbacks to BJ's childhood, being raised by a racist father, who - inevitably - becomes a Nazi collaborator). There are moments where it lays it all on a bit thick, but it mostly does an effective job. 

There's an extended sequence set in the town of Roswell, showing "ordinary" Americans seemingly co-living side-by-side with their Nazi conquerors in peaceful co-existance. Ku Klux Klan members walk the streets freely, fascists enjoy milkshakes, propaganda plays at the local picture house. The story also deals with the power of the media, the nature of "fake news", and an incontinent, psychotic Hitler. 

These are all powerful topics to tackle, and - for the most part - handled well. Showing how regular people will turn a blind eye to fascism for the sake of a peaceful existence, exposes the engine which allows evil ideologies to thrive; turning a blind eye. By not standing up to it, by not calling it out, by not tackling it at the root, it breeds and grows in the cracks, and before you know it the weeds have taken over your driveway.

For a game to so successfully marry big themes to what is otherwise a big, dumb, first-person shooter, with a handful of slapstick characters, is the biggest success of The New Colossus.

However, having loved its predecessor, I was otherwise a bit disappointed.

SCORE: Three Liberal Snowflake Cuck Agendas out of Five.
54 Comments
captain red dog
13/11/2017 10:10:17 am

Biffo, I really don't think there were 60,000 Nazis or white supremacists marching in Poland. Just think about that number and how ridiculous it sounds, it's absolutely preposterous for the media to spin that narrative. What you likely had was a soft right celebration of Polish independence that had a couple of thousand idiot Nazis taking part with racist banners. That's not great by any stretch but it certainly isn't 60, 000 Nazis marching in Europe. It's a spun narrative designed to frighten people. The media love to spin a story, make up shite and terrify people to keep the news cycle running. Take a look at Jonathon Pie's video this week where he hilariously highlights it.

For my money, Nazis should be mocked. Remove their power, don't make them taboo, ridicule their traditions and ideas and keep having games like Wolfenstein where they are the typical bad guys. We had stuff like the Cyborg Hitler in the original, kids grew despising Nazis and having Hitler as target practice. It feels like since we all started getting sensitive about the Nazis and making them taboo that they have got their power back.

For me, I'll be getting New Colossus on Switch in the new year so that I can shoot virtual Nazis in the balls from the comfort of my toilet seat.

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Harry Steele
13/11/2017 10:19:04 am

I worry that for some, scare robo-Hitler looks like a total bad ass.

People love bad guys because they're often depicted as all-powerful (one only has to look at how popular Evil Empire/First Order Star Wars merchandise is with the kids to see how this may extend to a fondness of fascism in later life).

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Meatballs-me-branch-me-do
13/11/2017 03:19:23 pm

If liking the Empire in Star Wars makes you a fascist sympathiser, liking the Rebels makes you a supporter of terrorism.

Grand Moff Tarkin
13/11/2017 08:15:25 pm

I agree, they really are the worst.

Alderaan was full of them, and that’s why we had to blow it up, for your safety. No further questions will be answered on the matter.

Nick
13/11/2017 10:49:26 am

The photos certainly show a boatload of right wing idiots. The rally was arraigned by the National Radical Camp (along with a couple of others), and whilst they wouldn't call themselves Nazis I don't think the label is that much of a stretch. There were other, official, celebrations for the soft right to partake in. I don't think 60000 idiots in a country of 36 million sounds ridiculous at all.

Any-hoo. I completely agree with your point on mocking. I know it comes from a position of privilege, we can mock because we aren't directly threatened, but they so want to be taken seriously. To deny them this is the right and proper thing to do.

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Benoit
13/11/2017 11:45:47 am

I don't want to attack you personally, so...

If a hypothetical person told me they honestly believed that there were 60,000 actual genuine Nazis in the entire modern world, I would either think they were completely deluded, or using a definition of Nazi so far from the meaning that that they should be using a different word.

Are you sure those articles you've been reading were written by people who were there? And that the "white supremacist" signs were translated from Polish with enough cultural sensitivity?

Or have newspapers around the world wrote their entire article by looking at a picture and using Google Translate?

Anyone can Google the organisation who organised the march, but it tells you nothing about the motivations of the attendees. And a photo of someone next to a sign doesn't mean they agree with it.


Anyway, this Wolfenstein doesn't look as exciting as the previous ones, which were exciting enough that I still haven't got round to playing them.

Nick
13/11/2017 12:19:22 pm

Hi Benoit. Well.. Thanks for not attacking me personally. I didn't realise that would be something someone would consider. I'm thankful, in this case, you controlled yourself.

In this case I'll defer to your greater knowledge and experience on the motivation of Polish far right nut jobs. They may have just fancied a walk and got caught up in all excitement. I'll admit I may have been guilty of throwing the N-word around willy-nilly. I just read a few of articles indicative of a majority media consensus and formed an opinion. I'll know in future to stick to just reading Breitbart/The Canary/wearing a tinfoil hat (please delete as appropriate).

Benoit
13/11/2017 12:48:14 pm

I never said you were a bad person, I just said that you're making assumptions about motivation that are not supported by any evidence other than "it said it in the newspaper".

The Poles have no love for the Nazis, for historical reasons that should be obvious with a little thought. They've had to fight to regain their own sovereignty several times in living memory (just about) and consequently are justifiably proud of their nation.

If that makes them "right-wing nutjobs" then I can't help you

Nick
13/11/2017 01:26:29 pm

Don't sweat it about the help Benoit. It means a lot that you tried.

Nuon Chea
13/11/2017 06:28:01 pm

I bet there are less than 10k Nazi's in the world and they have absolutely zero power. Well apart from those in Ukraine who the EU funded to launch a coup that over-threw a democratically elected Government because it favoured Russia.

There are no Nazi's in any mainstream political party in the UK or US.

There are however Marxists (110 million dead, from torture, gassing etc far in excess of the Nazi's), openly and proudly standing in parties in the UK and US who could be in Government within 4 years.

Dianne Abbot proudly announced on the Andrew Neil show that despite the 60 million he slaughtered, Mao did "on balance" more good than harm. Not sure what's worse, a Nazi killing me because she hates me or a Marxist killing me because my life is so worthless that it's no different to treading on an ant.

Not heard anyone in the Tory party making such statements. If they did, you wouldn't be seeing the same media radio silence that covered up for Abbott - a person who was previously reprimanded for racism and kept her job despite anyone else being unemployable.

Of course in BBC language, anyone to the right Joseph Stalin is "far right" and by default a Nazi. Yet if you look at the policies of these "Far Right" groups, they all have near identical policies to 1950's Labour.

You'd think by now that whack jobs in the Alt-Left would have learned that branding anyone from the centre-left to the centre-right a "Nazi" tends to lead to their own parties haemorrhaging votes but then you have to be stupid on an epic scale to claim that you "accidentally" killed 110 million people as I saw one person on this board claim last time this came up.

"it was in a good cause". "We are the good guys!"


Anyway Wolfenstein 2 is a great game but I am not finding the core shooting mechanics quite as fun as the first game. Can't put my finger on it but the first one was more "arcade-like".

There is too much cheap time wasting content on the sub too like going back into the flooded section to collect a nuke. What a sodding pointless waste of time dull mission. Just re-using assets to pad it out. That didn't progress the story one jot.

I'd also rather they explored the alternative-history without quite so much silly technology. Every time you put in something crazy it becomes very hard to dial it back in future chapters and as each one tries to out do the previous, it will become ridiculous.

They have now created a situation where a person can pretty much never be killed unless by a bullet directly through the brain which kind of makes a lot of future combat a bit meaningless as we can jump the shark and put humpty back together again.

PeskyFletch
14/11/2017 07:24:29 pm

Actually superbeast that didn't happen last time you cut and pasted the above stuff about marxism no one said anything about deaths being accidental, . And do you really think the BBC is some far left propaganda machine? Cause you know, people on the left think it is rightwing. Probably indicates it is a bit more balanced than you seem to think. Now tell me about how your dad was a miner, and that you are more educated than anyone who disagrees.....

mikeyc
13/11/2017 01:04:14 pm

anecdotally, i met some polish nazis in Salzberg 9 years ago (it's a great story about how I accidentally nearly befriended a nazi!) and so I can vouch that there's at least, like, 15.

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Nick
13/11/2017 11:25:15 am

I can't muster any enthusiasm for this game. I enjoyed the first game (not the first but yer know) but was getting a little bored by the end and felt no real need to go back to it for a second play through.

I think your right about the conflict in the mechanics of the game. It always felt like it wanted to be the full hairy chested run and blast shooter but couldn't really see it through.

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RichardM
13/11/2017 11:34:55 am

Anyone else struggle with describing these people as Nazis? Like, for me, the Nazis were those guys in Germany in and around WW2. I think calling these new guys Nazis sort of makes them too familiar, or oversimplifies the issue... While they espouse a modified Nazi ideology, they’re an entirely different thing. They aren’t even neo-Nazis in my own mental classification: you could spot them a mile off. New categorisation required.

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Haik
13/11/2017 12:22:55 pm

They want that scary label, and we keep giving it to them and treating them like a legitimate threat. That gains them new followers and so it snowballs

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Lodge Rebel
13/11/2017 11:40:22 am

Sounds exactly like my imagination thought this game would be. I can't say it appeals at all for some reason, it just doesn't have that 'something' for a FPS that makes me want to throw away my last shoe and shout out about.

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Wickford
13/11/2017 12:17:56 pm

Consequently, if this game was a movie there'd be big action sequences, followed by 15 minute-long scenes where the main character wanders around lost, while other people say hello to him.

Action movies aren't all explosions though?

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Mr Biffo
13/11/2017 01:00:40 pm

Er no. But generally the scenes where there aren't explosions aren't repeated extended instances of somebody lost in a submarine, where literally nothing else happens.

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FlennerOne
15/11/2017 12:25:14 pm

The Hunt for Red October says 'hello!'.

Jareth Smith
13/11/2017 12:31:05 pm

It looks boring and generic and, big surprise, it is boring and generic. I'll stick with Half-Life 2, thanks. This stultifying AAA mush needs to come to a halt - a mainstream industry overhaul is needed. Just look at Slime Rancher and then you've got banal nonsense like this which the graphics hounds will salivate over, but it's yet more instantly forgettable cannon fodder.

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John
13/11/2017 01:36:16 pm

1) It's not a great looking game. People who care just about the bleeding edge of fidelity will not find that here.
2) Different people play games for different reasons. Indeed, different games exist for different reasons and to offer different kinds of experiences. Slime Rancher is 'fun' – that's its reason to exist. Is Assassin's Creed: Origins 'fun' – kinda, but actually I think it primarily exists as an immersive other world. What you do within it is of lesser importance. In this latter type of experience, better graphics equals more emersion equals the 'game' doing a better job of its intended purpose. It's rather like the way the fallacious argument that films should be 'entertaining' with the simple introduction of Schindler's List and others like it. Were you entertained... erm... well... it was good, but erm...
3) Why is it so important that other people like the same things you do? You know what? It isn't, and you'll live longer if you give up on the whole 'other people are wrong' thing. People will like what they like, and nothing you say will change that.

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RG
13/11/2017 01:50:34 pm

I read this article and thought - I bet I can guess what Jareth has written. I was pretty close. I got the HL2 reference but sadly missed Slime Rancher (I know you've mentioned it a few hundred times, so my bad). I would have put a "COD clone" in there too, but that may be taking a break for the day.

Cannon Fodder was a great game though :)

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John
13/11/2017 02:27:38 pm

Sorry to correct you, but I think you mean 'Half-Life 2 the most bleeding edge, graphically demanding game of its day'.

Again, apologies for the correction.

Mrtankthreat
13/11/2017 02:32:45 pm

What is it that you actually want Jareth? Suppose the industry had the overhaul you crave what would that actually be like? The games you like are still being made. What more do you want? Do you want a world where only the games you like are being made? Could you describe your gaming industry utopia?

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Spiney O’Sullivan
13/11/2017 02:43:09 pm

Call me caustic and vacuous (because he will), but I think he just wants to start fights on Digi2000. I’ve seen no evidence of wanting to argue in good faith, so I’ve stopped even assuming it at this point.

Mrtankthreat
13/11/2017 03:21:09 pm

He probably buys all those games that he bashes too. I bet he rushed out to get an Xbox One x as well. He loves those graphics really does Jareth.

Jareth Smith
14/11/2017 10:05:57 am

John - Completely missing the point, dear, well done! Do I really need to point out the difference for you? Really? Oh well, here we go - Half-Life 2 is exceptional. There it is. So, derp, you've mindlessly stormed into that one and now your sanctimony and silliness have made you look as a dumb as a doormat. Whoopsie!

As for #2 from your opening comment - really, people have different interests!? So that means I'm completely unable to criticise some games for their generic nature? The FPS genre is renowned for being one tedious cash cow, so your debate there is erroneous and just in keeping with your tedious anti-Jareth Smith agenda. Boring.

#3 - That's a straw man argument. Are you that person I stated I wasn't going to chat to again? You have the same habit of being embarrassingly fatuous. That's also a hypocritical statement: "People will like what they like, and nothing you say will change that." - But apparently I'm not allowed to like what I like, or express my opinion, as it doesn't agree with your moronic agenda? I've rarely come across someone so eager to bungle into such hilariously bad errors. You have yourself a good day, dear! Very entertaining, thank you! :o)

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Jareth
14/11/2017 10:26:33 am

I had no boat in this race, but you still come off looking bad. Your argument for Half Life 2 is 'it's exceptional'. That's it? Are you happy with that, as an adult?

No substance, no cultural appreciation, embarrassing insults: as a whole your posts read like someone that spends at least a couple of hours a day involved in tepid, pointless bickering on the internet. Don't bring it here please, there's plenty of places that will be glad to accommodate you.

If you are that insecure you genuinely can't leave a post without repeating your preferences for some reason (knowing that everyone finds it distasteful and that it has the opposite effect you are intending), I would invite you to a) have a little think about that and b) try not posting until you have that unfortunate character defect in check.

Jareth Smith
14/11/2017 10:41:07 am

Jareth - Absolutely, the game is genius. Play it if you need to find out why, dear. Wolfenstein is mediocre pap which has met with middling reviews. There is no comparison, it's like asking me to explain why rap music is absolutely nothing compared to Mozart's 600+ compositions. Rap is awful, Mozart is genius - if you want me to elucidate the Half-Life 2 matter I could write an essay about its thousands of merits but, as an adult, you should be able to determine for yourself exceptional cultural quality over mindless filler. Here's the perfect example - the legendary Half-Life 2 or a Wolfenstein sequel which is painfully flawed. Did I really need to explain this to you, dear? Hmmmm?

"No substance, no cultural appreciation, embarrassing insults" - Yes, that's a good assessment of your juvenile retorts to me, dear; perhaps fire up a self-assessment at yourself when you have the free time. You're simply a belligerent ignoramus who is fueled by puerile, misguided qualia based on a very fundamental inability to comprehend what I'm stating is my opinion. I've made clear and articulate points and you're, once again, having another hissy fit. Get over yourself, please. :o)

Waynan The Barbarian
14/11/2017 10:58:29 am

"Dear".

Jareth
14/11/2017 10:58:51 am

Why don't you try and describe something you like about Half Life 2, instead of just reiterating the same 'point' over and over again? The former would make you seem like an interested fan of video games, and the latter makes you seem like a deeply unpleasant and insecure individual with mild mental problems.

Just the fact you think I was saying 'Half Life 2 isn't very good' instead of 'People don't like the way you conduct yourself' speaks volumes: again, your preferences are fine and nobody's business but your own. Nobody minds you having an opinion: it's the way in which you choose to conduct yourself that nobody likes.

ah, the rap music thing. Another laughable dismissal that once more outlines just how small your mind is (perhaps you attempting this diversion because you don't like me pointing out your socialising woes), but I'll play along: why not outline an appreciation of a classical piece you enjoy for me, just to prove you can? I don't think you are capable. I think you will head to thesaurus.com and mistake being needlessly, sophomorically verbose for informed cultural appreciation: you know, as in your previous posts. But prove me wrong!

Nick the unlikley rap fan
14/11/2017 11:05:17 am

K 231 Leck mich im Arsch Vs Fight the Power

Spiney O’Sullivan
14/11/2017 11:31:39 am

People, it’s probably time to stop taking this trolling seriously. If he had anything of actual value to say, he’d have said it in the first post that he’s been rewording every day for months.

Look at the broad claims about certain games without any real evaluation of why they’re “genius” or “pap”. Look at the cartoon aristocrat manner of speech and tendency to spend more time on insults and finding new words to dismiss any real debate. If it wasn’t a poor attempt at trolling to begin with, it has been for a while.

Jareth Smith
14/11/2017 11:54:18 am

Jareth - Rap music is for small minds only, dear, if you hold it in any regard other than utter contempt you are a philistine. It's for juveniles only and holds no artistic merit due to its simplicity, banality, and stupidity. If you'd like to try and defend rap music, however, perhaps try and explain why it's not so godawful, puerile, and rudimentary. Anyone with even the most fundamental understanding of music structure should be able to comprehend just how pathetic rap music is. But, again, it depends how stupid you are.

I'd also recommend conducting yourself in a less instantaneously combative manner if you want me to take you seriously - you've made it blatantly obvious you're a hypocrite. Your responses have been embarrassing and you clearly do not possess analytical abilities. I can appreciate your pride has taken a knock here but, really, you bring this on yourself. Have a good lunch, I'm going for a sandwich. :o)

Jareth Smith
14/11/2017 11:59:20 am

Spiney O’Sullivan - A clear indication you've lost this one. I've raised nothing but pertinent and clearly written points, you've all fallen about yourselves with temper tantrums, but apparently I'm trolling? You're not only hypocrites, your debasing yourselves with relentlessly puerile behaviour. You clearly don't realise your instantaneously combative nature is pernicious; you are bringing this on yourselves. The moment you see an opinion you don't agree with, out comes the ad hominem, casual stupidity, and caustic remarks.

No genuine assessment has occurred of my above comment. Let's recape - Wolfenstein II is mediocre, generic pap. The international critical assessment has confirmed this. It's another example as to how tedious, lazy, and cynical the majority of AAA (particularly those of the FPS genre) are. I am right. You lot are embarrassing yourselves. Get over it.

Mrtankthreat
14/11/2017 12:06:34 pm

"I'd also recommend conducting yourself in a less instantaneously combative manner if you want me to take you seriously - you've made it blatantly obvious you're a hypocrite."

Obvious troll is obvious. I doubt at this stage Jareth doesn't really lack that amount of self awareness and is now just yanking everyone's chain. It's probably Biffo having a laugh.

Jareth
14/11/2017 12:18:51 pm

It is astonishing - even after being called on a childish infatuation for overly verbose posts he still persists. I mean how redundant is this:

"..simplicity, banality, and stupidity.."

...and that's the first of his vapid 'word clusters' he mistakes for the sign of a developed mind. Take a look at how many are in just that one post... then he just says 'No, I'm right and you're wrong' without any justification or any thought. You're right, it's a pointless venture. I felt bad because it doesn't seem like the best existence, but can't say we didn't try.

Ignoring him isn't going to happen, the internet has taught us this repeatedly, so let's agree on something to type in response to him every time so we don't have to pay him regard. A single word. How about 'crabstick'?

Mrtankthreat
14/11/2017 12:19:55 pm

Woops. Caught myself out there with a double negative. Anyway, Jareth is an obvious troll but I reckon we'd miss him if he was gone. I enjoy reading the amusing retorts to his nonsense and even if his lack of self awareness is put on it's still pretty funny. Obviously it would be even funnier if he was genuine and didn't know how much of an ass he was being.

sawfish
14/11/2017 12:22:56 pm

Is it put on? There's a palpable bitterness there.

crabstick link
14/11/2017 12:29:35 pm

crabstick

Spiney O’Sullivan
14/11/2017 12:33:29 pm

@sawfish: I think the bitterness is sort of real. I’m guessing Jareth started posting here about AAA and graphics etc because he couldn’t win against the younger gamers on Reddit or wherever and thought we’d agree wholeheartedly, then got upset and started trolling us when people turned out to have other opinions.

Now it’s kind of a gimmick, and has become tiresome and repetitive. Did anyone even read those last few posts above?

Mrtankthreat
14/11/2017 01:25:51 pm

I read them and thought they were hilarious. The idea that he thinks he's winning is a hoot. Anyone with basic reading comprehension can see he is a twat. For me it would only be tedious if he's putting it on. If the bitterness and lack of self-awareness is real it's just funny and the fact he constantly undermines himself and continues to dig himself into a deeper hole amuses me no end. Although yeah, it probably is a sign of a mild mental disorder and he needs some sort of help rather than being laughed at.

Jol
14/11/2017 02:26:11 pm

I didn't think anyone was taking him seriously to begin with.

Every post is a criticism of AAA games, FPS games, the mainstream industry and graphics. Followed by a professsed love of exciting new and innovative indie games that are too obscure for us mainstream plebs, like Half Life 2, Doom, and Zelda.

This time he's mixed it up by throwing in a comparison between rap and Mozart, which is a bit like comparing Ridge Racer to Crusader Kings.

But hey good old Jar Jar gets a bite every time so it's easy to see why he does it. For some folks even negative attention is better than being ignored.

As for Wolfy II: It sounds a tad disappointing. It's a pity as the last one was quite good, but this sequel sounds like more like The Old Blood DLC than The New Order.

TOB didn't seem to know if it wanted to be a stealth game or a run & gun shooter - similar to what Biffo has said about Wolfy II - and didn't really provide you with the tools to properly deal with either situation effectively. Wolfy II will probably be worth a punt when it's on sale for a tenner.

DEAN
14/11/2017 03:29:46 pm

I also enjoy reading Jareth's posts and would miss him if he stopped and would be disappointed if he 'fell in line' - you do you, Jareth!

But you're wrong about rap music. The rhythms that they use can be very cool and sophisticated - up there with the best of any genre - I mean Jay Z for example - the guy's a fucking master class in syncopation.

Mozart’s Ghost
14/11/2017 03:55:32 pm

I quite like the Wu-Tang Clan.

Salieri’s Ghost thinks they’re awful though. That’s why nobody in the Ghost Club likes him.

Ol' Dirty Biscuits
14/11/2017 04:33:47 pm

Keep doing you Jareth, but be prepared for a daily drubbing

Been revisiting 'The Wu' recently, they really were a force...appearing seemingly out of nowhere, 9 ludicrously strong rappers with individual, disparate but complimentary styles, a whole folksy mythology about kung fu and chess behind them, their own lingo, their own sound, their own style...absolute domination! 36 Chambers is a serious contender for strongest debut album of all time

Jim
13/11/2017 02:59:15 pm

Would like to request some reviews of games other than Nintendo major releases or AAA shooters biffster :) maybe nothing else comes out anymore Tbf

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Clive Peppard
13/11/2017 03:26:27 pm

I’ve played Bound this weekend, is free on psn. It’s very left field and lovely looking and uses the medium of ballet as it’s combat system. Bored the arse off me.

Worms battlegrounds however is sublime.

Half life 2 was good at release but so was pong, time moves on.

Play Elite!

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Biscuits
13/11/2017 10:46:43 pm

It takes me about 15 minutes to get a game going on Worms

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Paul
13/11/2017 09:14:29 pm

I'll remind the assembled masses of another attempt to make Nazis funny. A sitcom called Heil Honey, I'm Home. It's on YouTube.

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Biscuits
14/11/2017 10:32:01 am

the KKK in Django Unchained were funny

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Dr. Budd Buttocks, MD
14/11/2017 12:16:05 pm

I was ready for The New Colossus to be amazing. The previews had me hyped beyond belief, the indignant rage from certain quarters about antifa was both priceless and slightly disturbing, and The New Order was one of the best shooters I'd played in years.

It's a good game no doubt, but I don't think it made the most of what it had. There are more "did that just fucking happen?" moments than in any other game I've ever seen, but almost all of them occur during cutscenes. The result of this is that the actual gameplay can't hope to match it.
I loved the premise, the characters, the writing and acting. It's all great, if slightly incoherent and less focused than the previous game. But it feels like the game part was an afterthought at times. There's lots of world building and it goes quite deep, but I hate the fact that you have to discover so much of it through collectible exposition items and utterly dull searching around the levels and in the U-boat hub. I spent far too long in the map screen.
As a shooter it's competent, but it hasn't progressed from the previous outing in any significant way. In some ways it feels like a step back. There's very few big set pieces and no big boss battles like the London Monitor. The toys you get to play with are underwhelming. There was no cool stuff to gradually upgrade like the laser cutter. Save for a couple of highlights, the occupied America setting was largely squandered on some terribly drab and clichéd levels that could have taken place anywhere.

The strength of the story and cut scenes was enough to keep me hooked, purely to find out what happened next. The gameplay under delivered.

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Tinker from Lovejoy
14/11/2017 01:29:35 pm

Good capsule review

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Barry Blazcowitz
15/11/2017 09:16:14 am

As I'm progressing through the game, I agree with you 100%. Good review Dr Buttocks

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