And what's more... we've put it together in such a way that even we - those of us on stage - won't know what's coming next. A sort of semi-structured chaos has become our calling card, so the majority of the show will be broken down into segments that are unscripted.
Oh, we've got games, we've got set pieces, and there is a script, and we're rehearsing... We need to know what should be happening at any given moment. We need to know what props we need, learn the musical and video cues. We need some semblance of form, so that we can always get back on track, even loosely. We need to know which guests are doing what and when.
But we're not writing down any jokes, or anything like that. We're giving ourselves the freedom and permission to go off-piste. I want to capture the chemistry and rawness of our YouTube videos; an edge-of-our-seats atmosphere, teetering on the verge of collapse at any minute. When we step out on Saturday night... none of us really have any idea where it's going to take us.
Rather then be terrified by this as you might think, I'm exhilarated by it. I'm excited. It's playing to our strengths as a group, and I can't wait to find out what the show will be.
None of this should be happening. This is a live stage show version of a 26 year-old Teletext video games magazine. We shouldn't have enough people interested to make that viable, and yet, astonishingly, we do. It's absurd.
Even more ridiculous is the number of people who are giving up their time to make this a reality - all for free. We'll have a whole team behind the scenes, and nobody working on Digitiser Live will be getting paid.
David Walford and Chris Bell have organised an entire afternoon of Digi-related activities and panels. Big figures in the YouTube community are coming to be a part of it. Some people in the audience are travelling from as far afield as Skye and America, for pity's sake...!
And while some of it may be semi-familiar from Digitiser The Show, we're scaling up the ambition as the show goes along. I've no idea if some of it is even going to work...
Heck, I've probably lost money on it, as I did on Found Footage and Digitiser The Show, because of the level of ambition - and, candidly, we would've made a nice little profit if we'd just stuck the desk on stage and sat behind it for two hours, chatting.
But that's not the point. I do this because the creating is what gets me up in the mornings. The thinking of ideas. The thrill of the possibilities. Everyone involved is the same; we want to create something with Digitiser Live that will stay in the memories of everyone who's there.
Just this weekend gone there was one segment that I wasn't feeling confident about. It was a bit nothing, it wasn't Digi-esque enough, it felt like it was a waste of one of our guests. So Sanya and I brainstormed a bit and came up with two separate solutions, and decided to use both of them. Now it's potentially shaping up to be one of my favourite parts of the whole show.
I love that. The problem-solving gives me oxygen!
I knew from the off, especially once we took the punt on booking a larger venue, that we needed to scale up the show. It's not enough to simply do what we've done on YouTube.
Things that work for a camera, with editing after the fact, won't fly in front of 450 people. I also didn't want to lose the chemistry that we've found doing the Minis.
It's a two-way thing; the audience are part of the show. Not in the sense of picking on people, but more that we want to feed off the audience's energy. The people watching are the fuel for the performers, and we have to make sure that the fuel is ignited properly. It goes both ways. We want - we need - to hear you whooping, cheering, applauding, laughing and singing.
I'm reminded of seeing some of my favourite comedy shows live, and how they adapted to a different sort of format. The final Monty Python shows at the O2 should've been a disaster - a bunch of ageing comedians rolling out ancient sketches in a massive space - but it was brilliant and inspiring. They put on a proper event that could only have worked in a venue that size.
For me, personally, it's an incredibly significant night. It has been almost five years since I resumed being Mr Biffo. This time five years ago I could never have imagined a day when I had the confidence to stand up and be a performer, but over those five years - through doing this site, live panels, Digifest, Found Footage, Digitiser The Show, and the Minis - I've become more and more confident.
Getting everything done on time is proving to be bloody stressful - and injuring both my knees and my arm over the past month hasn't helped - but the fact I could even contemplate something like this with zero nerves is down to the support I've had over the last five years.
My wife has played a massive part in bringing me back to myself, as have the people I've worked with, but I also know the entire Digi community has my back as well. If I fall at the live show (in a metaphorical sense, though with my joints it's quite likely to be literal too), I know you'll bring me back to my feet.
I also need to say a few words about Gannon, Larry and Octav1us. Among us, Paul is the only one with significant live experience. He's at home in such an environment, and he's going to be my safety net. The rest of us will be doing this for more or less the first time in our lives. It's huge pressure, but we all know we're playing to friends, and that makes a difference.
Many of you are, I know, anxious about coming. You don't do well in social situations. Crowds can be scary. But you're not alone. All of us on stage have had to overcome things to stand up there and try to entertain you for a couple of hours. If we can do it - you can do it.
And if you've been wavering, if you've not yet bought a ticket, but feel you might enjoy it, I implore you to push yourself out of your comfort zone and come along. Based upon past events I've put on, the atmosphere will be brilliant; warm, friendly, non-judgemental, and no pressure.
You'll be among friends. Nobody's going to make you do something you don't want to do. You don't have to hang out with us in the bar afterwards. We just want the night to be a celebration of all of us misfits and geeks, and for everyone to go home with happy memories, feeling that life is a little bit better.
Saturday 20th July 2019
2pm - Chunky Fringe. Details.
7pm - Digitiser Live!
Harrow Arts Centre, Harrow.
There are no physical tickets issued (there'll be a guest list on the night), and there will be no tickets available on the door.
Tickets are still available from the Digitiser Shop.