Arguably, Night Trap was the most high-profile release ever for Sega's Mega-CD, the needless CD-ROM Mega Drive add-on, which many (me) consider to be the start of Sega's impressive downfall.
However, it also became mired in a "videogame nasty" storm, which led directly to the creation of America's games industry ratings system, the ESRB. You know: despite being about as provocative as an episode of The One Show. Tellingly, the re-released game will be rated "teen", down from the original version's "mature".
Could it be that full-motion video games are ripe for a revival? Or is this just a slice of retro-gaming kitsch, a throw-back to an era when people became outraged over the slightest little... oh.
Also, which other Mega CD games could be ripe for a re-release? Frankly, it's not an easy question to answer: there were barely any truly classic system exclusives, and most of the Mega CD's best games were "special editions" of older games with extra levels, and nicer music, and an animated cat which popped up on screen at regular intervals to put a hot cone in his "Henry".
Still... y'know... I gave it a shot.
The bonus stages featured some nice SNES-style 3D courses, but the real innovation was the use of time travel; Sonic could travel between the future and the past mid-level. Sadly, this didn't feature him interacting with, I dunno, Jacobites or Saxons, or the band Saxon. It just meant a different colour scheme and platform layout.
That said, while being one of the more solid entries in the Sonic series, having revisited Sonic CD... there's not a lot in there which couldn't have been done on the basic Mega Drive. Still... Never mind, eh.
I told you this list would be hard work.
Dripping with the cyberpunk tropes that were fashionable at the time, Snatcher is essentially a first-person point-and-click adventure with shooting sequences, and - get this - a character called Metal Gear. Quite how it ties into that series' convoluted timeline is unclear, but you might like to get a crowbar out.
Snatcher was critically acclaimed upon release... but in the interests of full disclosure, I found it a bit boring.
So, this is going well then...
I really liked Thunderhawk, from Britain's very own Core Design, who were based in Derby. Actually... having said a few weeks ago - when I was up there to shoot Found Footage - that I'd never been to Derby before... I've literally just remembered that Mr Hairs and I once visited Core Design HQ, and they took us out for lunch. So... that's nice.
Though it had already been released on - shudder - the Amiga, Thunderhawk was one of the few decent Mega CD games to actually offer something other than full-motion video, which couldn't be done on the Mega Drive. It was this: a really good combat flight simulator with you in a helicopter. It actually made me think that buying a Mega CD wasn't such a bad idea after all.
Well, for about five minutes.
You know: not least because there wasn't much else worth getting.
Why was it called Popful Mail? That's the name of the main character, obviously. It's a stupid name.
Let us just pause for a moment to consider the name Silpheed. Surely I wasn't alone in wanting to call it "Slipheed"?
Hey, here's another thing: one of Digi's first big competitions was a tie-up with D-D-Dixons. I've mentioned before that we gave away Robocop's actual car as part of that competition, but we also gave away many, many, Mega-CDs and CD Walkmen.
The method by which this was done was that Dixons sent us loads of vouchers for said things - far more than we were ever able to give away on Digitiser - and we posted them out to winners.
Can you guess what happened? That's right: when the competition closed we had a lot of left over vouchers, which D-D-Dixons never wanted back.
You might be able to fill in the blanks there...
Domestic simpleton "Ned" is thrust into one dangerous scenario after another, and the player must avert his demise in a Dragon's Lair stylee.
Failure could result in "Ned" being eaten by a bear, driving off a cliff, getting arrested by cops, shot by cowboys, plummeting to his death from an aeroplane, accidentally sitting on a hot cone, rolling himself up in a tarp, or choking to death on a duck's leg. It wasn't good, but they'd clearly lobbed a few quid at the video sequences.
Which probably leaves you with just one question: what is "Ned" short for?
Okay... look... see... I know you all like games like this, but the more Japanese they are, the more I turn cold. I liked Zelda. I liked Secret of Mana. But aren't they all much of a muchness? I dunno. Each to their own, I suppose, but it's time to come clean: I lose patience with all those text-y conversations.
Yes. Yes, I probably do have ADHD. It would explain a lot.
Another World appeared on every system capable of running it... but its sequel, Heart of the Alien, was a Mega CD-exclusive. Furthermore, it was as good as its predecessor.
So... y'know. That was a bit of a waste then.
This was a lie, however; it didn't look as good as the original, and had less enemies on screen at once. Also, for the Western release they put extra clothing on the female characters so that they looked less like prostitutes.
Can you imagine if they did that now? Capcom would be blacklisted by the right, some minor female employee would be singled out as being responsible for the politically correct decision and have her entire life doxxed by a bunch of a-holes, the left would get on their high horse about the inhuman behaviour of the right, and we'd get article after article, and endless YouTube videos about it, and there'd be Twitter spats, and news stories, and somebody would end up with their life ruined, and everyone else would forget about it entirely a week later, as the news and outrage cycle moved on.
YOU ALL SUCK.