DIGITISER
  • MAIN PAGE
  • Features
  • Videos
  • Game Reviews
  • FAQ

THE REAL THREAT FACING BRITAIN: GIANT MIGRANTS

23/6/2016

10 Comments

 
Picture
Picture
Greetings, Dicks. I'm Doctor Ashley Tagg... although some of my students have recently taken to calling me "Doctor Hashtag". I don't know why.

It can't have escaped your attention that we are on the eve of an historic, three-way, decision: whether to leave, opt out from, or depart the European Union, or "Eu-U".

Before you take to the polls today, I want to draw your attention to the real risk facing Britain today, a phenomenon discovered by my dear friends, the Chan quadruplets, from the University of Beijing (the students call them "4Chan" - I don't know why). 

That phenomenon is the real and present threat of massive migration from the continent. Here I present for you today a picture of what Britain will become if we do not vote to leave. I thank you with all my heart for giving me this opportunity, and I wish you the very best in your endeavours.

If we do not close our borders, this is the Britain we shall have: a country overrun by enormous Continental migrants. These literal giants, these towering mutations, shall flood our towns and villages with their massive way of life, looming over our high streets, and pointing and frowning at our trains.
Picture
The colossal incomers will stand twixt our mock Tudor semis on bin day.
Picture
Our villages will be overrun by their hen parties, our streets and cul-de-sacs littered with their enormous discarded WKD bottles and colossal penis-shaped novelties.
Picture
Their towering children will be free to roam our farms to get a better look at the trains. They shall distract the drivers with their vague and benign smiles.
Picture
Their enormous elders will stand and mock our sportsmen. "Look at the tiny cricketers!" they shall snort, derisively. "They're small."
Picture
Driven here in search of a better way of life, the large ones shall interfere with the games on our village greens, lifting our players by their heads, and moving them around like baubles.
Picture
These gargantuan incomers will sweep away our values with their large brooms.
Picture
They will peer into our houses, on the way back from the benefits office.
Picture
They will lean against our shops, preventing honest, dependable, British workers from doing their jobs.
Picture
They shall squat on our bridges, while dropping mountains of excrement into our rivers.
Picture
Our roads will be blocked by their yellow-trousered sit-downs, causing huge repercussions for our transport infrastructure.
Picture
And their oversized children shall rub themselves up against the thatched roofs of our homes, causing untold damage to our way of life.
Picture
Vote #Leave to stop the massive migrants!
Picture
FROM THE ARCHIVE:
LET'S PAY A VISIT TO... TRUMPTON!
15 THINGS WE LEARNED ABOUT NOEL EDMONDS FROM HIS WEBSITE
TEN ACTUAL FOOTBALLERS WHO MISUNDERSTOOD MY INSTRUCTIONS, AND URINATED IN MY GARDEN


10 Comments
Ima xenofobe brexitz lul
23/6/2016 11:35:11 am

how churlish to suggest pro-brexit is down to xenophobia. For myself, it's a matter of resolution. No thankyou to one size fits all political solutions. Rule of thumb, if dodgy Dave wants it, then there's something amiss

Reply
Hamptonoid
23/6/2016 12:30:53 pm

Yes, we should all throw our lot in with not-at-all-dodgy Trump, all-round-good-egg Boris, and bemused-ale-guzzler Farage.

Reply
Ima xenofobe brexitz lul
23/6/2016 02:24:19 pm

Haha true. Ultimately politics is riddled with scum. Perhaps we should try and make our choices based on the high level premises, instead of cherry picking villains and having it play out like some lame-o pantomime

Hamptonoid
23/6/2016 05:49:25 pm

It's too late for that now...OH NO IT ISN'T

Walter Peck
23/6/2016 12:51:50 pm

1080p-ers for Brexit!

Reply
Ima xenofobe brexitz lul
23/6/2016 02:28:47 pm

lul

Seano
23/6/2016 12:19:03 pm

Good lord. I never realised they were so big!

Reply
Anton Gully
23/6/2016 12:39:27 pm

This is like a pastoral version of Attack on Titan.

Reply
Stay
23/6/2016 02:34:50 pm

Only more harrowing.

Reply
Kelvin Green link
23/6/2016 08:10:02 pm

I didn't realise immigration was such a big problem.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    This section will not be visible in live published website. Below are your current settings:


    Current Number Of Columns are = 2

    Expand Posts Area =

    Gap/Space Between Posts = 12px

    Blog Post Style = card

    Use of custom card colors instead of default colors = 1

    Blog Post Card Background Color = current color

    Blog Post Card Shadow Color = current color

    Blog Post Card Border Color = current color

    Publish the website and visit your blog page to see the results

    Picture
    Support Me on Ko-fi
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    RSS Feed Widget
    Picture

    Picture
    Tweets by @mrbiffo
    Picture
    Follow us on The Facebook

    Picture

    Archives

    December 2022
    May 2022
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    November 2020
    September 2020
    July 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014


    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • MAIN PAGE
  • Features
  • Videos
  • Game Reviews
  • FAQ