
Some of those jokes will be arriving here soon. Oh look - they're here already.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Doctor.
Doctor Who?
No - Doctor Harold Shipman. Just let me in.
PATIENT: Doctor, doctor – my foot is all swollen.
DOCTOR: I’m Harold Shipman.
QUESTION: Why did the chicken cross the road?
ANSWER: He was trying to avoid Harold Shipman.
QUESTION: What vessel did Harold Shipman go on holiday in?
ANSWER: A ship, man.
QUESTION: What does Harold Shipman put in the ground to make plants grow?
ANSWER: Seeds and bulbs.
QUESTION: What is Harold Shipman's favourite food?
ANSWER: Beard (bread).
QUESTION: Why did Harold Shipman wear glasses?
ANSWER: So he could see the things he was doing.
QUESTION: Did Harold Shipman ever own a dog?
ANSWER: I'd have to ask someone.
QUESTION: What's worse than Harold Shipman biting into an apple and finding a worm?
ANSWER: Harold Shipman himself.
Those were all excellent, tasteful jokes.