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THE MAN'S DADDY - And his hilarious jokes

9/12/2014

Hello. I'm a popular comedian called The Man's Daddy. Here are some jokes I recently performed at the Fresh Prince of Bell-Air's birthday party. They went down a storm.

QUESTION: What is the hairiest board game in the world?
ANSWER: Chess Hair (chest hair)

QUESTION: Who is the most grateful actor in the world?
ANSWER: T.Hanks (thanks).

QUESTION: What is the main ingredient of peanuts?
ANSWER: Peanuts.

QUESTION: What is the worst-tasting fruit in the world?
ANSWER: A crap apple (crab apple).

QUESTION: What is the largest bird in the world?
ANSWER: Big Bird from Sesame Street.

QUESTION: How do you make a panda bear?
ANSWER: Shove coal in a polar bear’s eyes.

QUESTION: Which actor owns the most apple-picking equipment?
ANSWER: Orchard Gear (Richard Gere).

QUESTION: What’s the best way to ruin a football match?
ANSWER: Lose.

QUESTION: Why was Big Bird exiled from Sesame Street?
ANSWER: He laid an egg, and ate it in front of some kids.

Those were all amazing jokes. I'm going now. I've got to buy a hose, and I'm already late.

5 Comments

Deexan

9/12/2014 10:35:31 am

TRUE STORY:

My mrs' mum once wrote a cheque and entered the name TOM HANKS in the recipient section. The man who the cheque was for was called Tom, but not Tom Hanks.

Much mirth has been had from the re-telling of this story in a real world environment, though I fear that said mirth isn't translating via this unfunny and, frankly, overlong anecdote.

Mr Biffo

10/12/2014 02:56:45 pm

I salute your mother-in-law.

Frank Chickens

10/12/2014 08:48:13 am

What did the yuppie name his dogs?

Filo and Fax.

10/12/2014 02:57:03 pm

Yup.

Interstellar 555

10/12/2014 03:27:00 pm

QUESTION) Where do I (YOU) officiate weasel baseball in New York?
ANSWER) The Umpire Stoat Building.

THE MAN'S DADDY - And his hilarious jokes

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