I wasn't on either of those shows (they don't actually exist), but you may remember me being on them, for some reason. I don't know. It doesn't matter, I suppose.
This week I've been thinking a lot about crooners, and have decided to write a number of jokes about those crooners. I'm sure that's the sort of thing people expect to find on a website that deals with video games. Here come the crooner jokes now. I hope they're ok.
ANSWER: Absorbing Crosby (Bing Crosby)
QUESTION: Which crooner was brought back to life using body parts from corpses?
ANSWER: Frankensinatra (Frank Sinatra/Frankenstein)
QUESTION: Which crooner rubs himself sensually while he parks your car for you?
ANSWER: Rudey Valet (Rudee Vallee)
QUESTION: Which crooner is most desperate to hide his alopecia?
ANSWER: Perry Combover (Perry Como)
QUESTION: Which crooner is the best at doing sums?
ANSWER: Johnny Math Is (Johnny Mathis)
QUESTION: Which crooner is the opposite of Nat King Cole?
ANSWER: Not King Cole (Nat King Cole)
QUESTION: What was crooner Bobby Darin initially known as?
ANSWER: Baby Darin (Bobby Darin)
QUESTION: Who is the least shiny of the crooners?
ANSWER: Matt Monro (Matt Monro)
QUESTION: Which crooner would you least like to sit next to on a plane?
ANSWER: Dean Farting (Dean Martin)
QUESTION: Who was the first crooner on the moon?
ANSWER: Louis Armstrong (Neil Armstrong).
QUESTION: Which crooner will help sweep up the leaves for you?
ANSWER: Rake Harles (Ray Charles)
QUESTION: Which crooner is obsessed with protractors?
ANSWER: Angelbert Humperdinck (Engelbert Humperdinck).
QUESTION: Which crooner should never be exposed to excessive heat?
ANSWER: Melt Ormé (Mel Tormé).