As you may be slightly aware, it's a different sort of Digitiser2000 this week, as Mr Biffo has been sent to the drying out clinic (aka "The Beef Jerky Factory"). Normal service will be resumed shortly.
Thanks to everyone who took the time to write us an email, following Biffo's pitiful Twitter begging. We were inundated with at least as many letters as you see on this page.
Having seen the glory heaped upon these correspondents, perhaps you yourself would like to appear on the Digitiser2000 "letters page", so that you may brag to all of your friends about it. Who knows - you may even become the next Stuart N Hardy, Dantendo or Danny Boyd (Luton Area)?
Ploss... ploss send emails/PCs, ploss to digitiser2000@gmail.com
Thanks to everyone who took the time to write us an email, following Biffo's pitiful Twitter begging. We were inundated with at least as many letters as you see on this page.
Having seen the glory heaped upon these correspondents, perhaps you yourself would like to appear on the Digitiser2000 "letters page", so that you may brag to all of your friends about it. Who knows - you may even become the next Stuart N Hardy, Dantendo or Danny Boyd (Luton Area)?
Ploss... ploss send emails/PCs, ploss to digitiser2000@gmail.com
VORTEX
I thought I would take you up on your offer of asking a question. I spent some time trying to think up a cool question and almost gave up. Then inspiration hit. There was no way I was going to come up with the best question ever so I would pass that responsibility on to someone else.
Therefore my question is this: What is the question you have been longing to be asked so you can give that perfect answer you have been waiting to give for like forever?
Chris Davey.
I thought I would take you up on your offer of asking a question. I spent some time trying to think up a cool question and almost gave up. Then inspiration hit. There was no way I was going to come up with the best question ever so I would pass that responsibility on to someone else.
Therefore my question is this: What is the question you have been longing to be asked so you can give that perfect answer you have been waiting to give for like forever?
Chris Davey.
It might seem a bit weird, but that WAS the question we've been longing to be asked, so that we could give that perfect answer we had been waiting to give for like forever.
ARTEX
Can someone explain prebooking Video Games to me?
I get it with physical media to a point, although I've never in my life actually had to struggle to buy a hard copy of a game on Day One so it's still a bit of a scam, but Digital Prebooks?
Is there a risk they're going to run out of bytes before everyone gets theirs? CHARLATANS.
Euphemia R
Can someone explain prebooking Video Games to me?
I get it with physical media to a point, although I've never in my life actually had to struggle to buy a hard copy of a game on Day One so it's still a bit of a scam, but Digital Prebooks?
Is there a risk they're going to run out of bytes before everyone gets theirs? CHARLATANS.
Euphemia R
Isn't it so they can put all their money in a special savings account, and make interest on it? No idea if that's true, but... well... it's one theory, we suppose.
BIG TEX
How does the Digitiser2000 theme tune go?
Neil Hillen
How does the Digitiser2000 theme tune go?
Neil Hillen
Press reveal and Ed Sheeran will sing it to you:
REVEAL:
TECH SUPPORT
Dear Sir/Madam,
I see you have had only 4 letters for digitiser so far, I would like you very much to consider this to be the 5th letter.
Thanks and best regards,
Corporal Tom Barometer (retired)
Dear Sir/Madam,
I see you have had only 4 letters for digitiser so far, I would like you very much to consider this to be the 5th letter.
Thanks and best regards,
Corporal Tom Barometer (retired)
Well, we've had more slightly emails than that now, which has rendered the enormous effort you went to as somewhat a waste of everybody's time.
SUPPORT BRA
Dear Digitiser, Why can't I get Ceefax & Oracle on my 4K Ultra HD TV? It cost £1299! The remote has a "text" button - what a swizz!
A. Crocswearer, Inverness.
Dear Digitiser, Why can't I get Ceefax & Oracle on my 4K Ultra HD TV? It cost £1299! The remote has a "text" button - what a swizz!
A. Crocswearer, Inverness.
Does it have a reveal button so you can do stuff like this?
REVEAL:
BRA HUMBUG
Dear Mr Biffo,
Who is your main on Mario Kart?
PS: Can you get my Bamber Boozle's autograph?
Francis Ford Coppola
Dear Mr Biffo,
Who is your main on Mario Kart?
PS: Can you get my Bamber Boozle's autograph?
Francis Ford Coppola
A controversial choice, perhaps, but it was usually Toad. Or Mario - it always seemed a bit wrong to not be playing Mario in a game called Mario Kart.
HUMBUG ENGLEDINCK
As a seasoned gamer I find myself regularly bathing in my own glory as I deftly end the lives of some AI villain or fantastically overtake a rival on a race track. But then, I go online with good friends (never strangers, they are dangers) and find myself stumbling around like some demented fool who has never picked up a controller in their lives.
Why oh why oh why of why do the big games developers and hardware manufacturers allow such blatant reality checks to exist in the virtual world where I am king. Let’s #breaktheinternet so we can go back to the good old days of friendless gaming where player 1 is king.
Clive Peppard
As a seasoned gamer I find myself regularly bathing in my own glory as I deftly end the lives of some AI villain or fantastically overtake a rival on a race track. But then, I go online with good friends (never strangers, they are dangers) and find myself stumbling around like some demented fool who has never picked up a controller in their lives.
Why oh why oh why of why do the big games developers and hardware manufacturers allow such blatant reality checks to exist in the virtual world where I am king. Let’s #breaktheinternet so we can go back to the good old days of friendless gaming where player 1 is king.
Clive Peppard
What are you advocating, George? It sounds a bit eugenics-y if you ask us.
THE RINKY-DINCK PANTHER
Following your call for letters, I would like to offer you the following:
é
Thanks,
MrPSB
Following your call for letters, I would like to offer you the following:
é
Thanks,
MrPSB
You're lucky we even bothered to cut and paste this, PSB.
A PANTHER EVER SO PINK
Along with the games I've procured over the years from my Corrupt Uncle (these are all played via emulation of some sort or another and amass to well over 20000) I have over 500 PC titles too. Whilst the emulated titles are somewhat dubious in their legality, especially as many of them can now be purchased again for next-gen systems and suchlike, most of them can only be played via emulation and Corrupt Uncles. This is somewhat sad but a fact of life.
That being said, I spend most of my time playing these older games - indeed, at least two-thirds of the games I've purchased in my Steam library haven't even been downloaded yet, let alone played.
This made me think; am I alone in this weirdly expensive hobby of buying games only never to touch them or are there others like me?
I am fit and strong and that is all. (That 20000 figure up there is just a guess - I can't be bothered to work out how many games I do have but I do know it's in the many thousands.)
Gaming Mill
Along with the games I've procured over the years from my Corrupt Uncle (these are all played via emulation of some sort or another and amass to well over 20000) I have over 500 PC titles too. Whilst the emulated titles are somewhat dubious in their legality, especially as many of them can now be purchased again for next-gen systems and suchlike, most of them can only be played via emulation and Corrupt Uncles. This is somewhat sad but a fact of life.
That being said, I spend most of my time playing these older games - indeed, at least two-thirds of the games I've purchased in my Steam library haven't even been downloaded yet, let alone played.
This made me think; am I alone in this weirdly expensive hobby of buying games only never to touch them or are there others like me?
I am fit and strong and that is all. (That 20000 figure up there is just a guess - I can't be bothered to work out how many games I do have but I do know it's in the many thousands.)
Gaming Mill
We do that, but with home exercise equipment, and good intentions.
HE REALLY IS A GROOVY CAT
Hello man in email box. I'm hearing things that virtual reality is going to be the top biscuit to feast upon later this year. What system should I opt for? My current PC has a 3D FX Voodoo2 card in it. Will this be ok for my virtual reality adventure?
Sean Buckingham
Hello man in email box. I'm hearing things that virtual reality is going to be the top biscuit to feast upon later this year. What system should I opt for? My current PC has a 3D FX Voodoo2 card in it. Will this be ok for my virtual reality adventure?
Sean Buckingham
Yes. That will be fine. Press reveal to see the kind of adventure you can expect.
REVEAL:
Digitiser2000 letters go here: digitiser2000@gmail.com
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