THE DIGITISER2000 FRIDAY LETTERS PAGE

Have you supported Mr Biffo's Found Footage on Kickstarter yet? Though the original funding goal was battered to death, there are just 27 days remaining to reach our stretch goal, which will ensure a Christmas special of what is sure to be a ground-breaking online series, that's being made just for you! And by "you" I mean "people who have given money and freeloaders". Please... please help me... 

And now? And now I take no responsibility for the shocking quality of this week's Friday Letters Page. I can, alas, only print what we get. 

If you want to save The Digitiser2000 Friday Letters Page from itself - or have something you'd like me to give some attention to in Plug Zone - please send your emails for next week to this place here: digitiser2000@gmail.com

BLOCK PARTY
I had a great time at Block Party. Many thanks to Dan Farrimond for organising the daytime sessions, and to you, Paul, and your family for organising the evening.

The whole day at £10 was a bargain - I'd be willing to spend £15 or £20 on a similar event in the future. Trying to describe it to people afterwards was tricky, but my wife remembers Digi of old so was quite understanding, and has been enjoying the videos from the event.

It was lovely to see your fiancée and daughter helping out throughout the day and in Quiz-me-do, and always smiling - it gave me warm fuzzy feelings seeing them helping the dad of the family in his passion project. It must have been slightly weird them meeting a load of oddballs like us, like a husband inviting the whole of his strangely-populated office home for dinner!

There was a nice family/community feel to the whole event, especially because generally speaking you, and Violet Berlin etc. were always around rather than hidden in a green room. I've not been to any other fan conventions, but I imagine they are often bigger and more corporate.

​Of course, I would quite understand that you would love to sell more tickets next time, which might need a bigger venue and change things somewhat.

Many thanks again, and much love.
​John Veness

Thank you, John. A genuinely touching letter, well written, and with hardly any spelling or grammatical errors which needed correcting. This is the standard to which I hold all Digitiser2000 letter writers. Sadly, it's all downhill from here.

CLOCK PARTY
Chart Cat has been conspicuous by his absence. Perhaps it's time for Chart Cat's top ten handsome crabs?

There's Buster Crabbe, for starters.
​David Walford

And here we go. You are right though, Albert Square. Chart Cat IS long overdue for a return. Maybe next week...? Press reveal to see if Chart Cat has a special message just for you.

REVEAL:

CLACK PARTY
Help me. I can't stop it.
Mr PSB

What makes this particularly offensive to me is that it looks like you drew that with a mouse. Real teletext artists never use the mouse. Also, those are very squat goujons. They look more like nuggets. Goujon John hates nuggets.

SLACK PARTY
There's a man who calls himself John,
Who peddles his chicken goujons,
If they are consumed,
You surely are doomed,
For the chicken's not chicken but prawn.
I hate prawns.
@yomamagomama

I actually think the notion of a prawn goujon is a good one. Regardless, I can't help but feel that this week's letters page has lost its already tenuous grip on being a letters page about video games. Still, let's soldier on...

CRACK PARTY
When I was at primary school some bloke came and did a talk about his work. His claim to fame? He designed the alien image that graces the packets of KP's Space Raiders. He was really boring. The bell went for dinner time and we all fucked off to the playground: "Wait! Wait! I haven't finished yet!" he shouted in desperation.

When he was leaving and heading to his car, a load of the bad lads started booting footballs at him as hard as they could. Shane Jones, the baddest lad, got hold of a cricket ball from somewhere and lobbed it at him, smacking him right on his ear.

​"Stop it! Stop it! Go away you horrid children!" he screamed from behind his clipboard that he was using as an impromptu (and ineffective) shield. All of the bad lads took this as a 'let's do it more!' request.

Me and Jonathan White just watched them and kept on eating our sandwiches.

My sister lives almost literally next to the KP factory where they make Space Raiders. You can tell when it's a Thursday there because the stench of pickled onion flavour fills the air so bad that even the birds don't come out.

I am fit and strong and that is all.
Gaming Mill

I remember the Space Raiders artwork well, because it was designed by the brilliant 2000AD artist Brett Ewins. He died last year from emphysema, following a long battle with mental health problems. I bet you don't feel so clever now, eh? You could've stepped in. But noooo... You and Jonathan White just watched, and kept on eating your sandwiches.

AMEN
Dear Mr Biffo, which was Gladys Knight's favourite Pip?
Treacle Truffle

Just press reveal, for pity's sake.

REVEAL:

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Ram Steelwood has a new and lovely game he's developed, which he would like you to vote for on Steam Greenlight. It's called ForeveRacist - sorry, ForeveRacers - and he describes it as a "an online multiplayer racing game". You can find out more about it at this link. I meant to give it a go this week, but got distracted. The videos look nice, though.

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Marc Booth's brother has a weekly radio show called GameFace Show - covering video games and chip tunes - which has "just started a weekly TV/Twitch/YouTube show thing" that he would love you all to go and watch. I watched most of the first one, and enjoyed it.

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