If you missed any Digi Mini videos in recent weeks, I implore you to go check out the channel. The last batch have been among my favourite things ever, and your subscription and support is very much appreciated.
Also, a reminder that we now have a sssssnailmail address if you want to send us anything to have a look at. We're planning to open our post on camera, so you'll get a shout out.
The address is this address here:
Digitiser/Cheapshow, PO Box 1271, Harrow, HA3 3NS.
If you'd like to appear here, or you've something you'd like me to give some attention to in our occasional Plug Zone, or you've got a picture of a bin you wish to share, please send your filthy emails to this place here: firstname.lastname@example.org
I do not wish to see you and Gannon in any more videos, henceforth I shall close my eyes when visiting your YouTube channel.
Ola Rudyard Kipling's 'Biff'.
As a sinister lefty, I'm used to playing older PC games with really awkward keyboard settings if there is no customisation. Thinking about it, nearly all game pads are 'right handed' too. Have any lefties in Digi-land seen or used a custom left handed control pad? Any examples of designs that are less dextro-centric than the norm?
Anyway, A Bonnie Tyler Tribute for you:
'Once upon a time I was doing a poo.
Turned out it was only a fart.
Nothing I can do, a total eclipse of my arse.'
Have a good weekend!
Voiced By Guides
In return, have a reveal:
I wanted to reiterate how great it was seeing Sanja on the channel. She is brilliant and that video is my favourite Digi Mini ever. Genuinely, properly lovely stuff. Thank you for it.
I know I've thanked you often for all you do, but this time I wanted to thank you for the wonderful community you have around you and your work. I've met so many incredible people because of you and I am incredibly grateful. This time last year I didn't know about you and your work and now I'm about to go and spend the weekend with friends I met because of you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
All the best,
You'll get a little more of Sanya (you are correct that it's "Sanja", but she mostly uses a Y, because people have a tendency to pronounce it "San-dyah") in Sunday's video. We did film one with just me and her, but we were testing out a new mic set-up, and the sound wasn't very good, so that might just go up for Patrons. I'm sure she'll be a semi-regular fixture going forwards.
I know you asked for no more of these, but I've never been one to pay any attention in the slightest to what you do or don't want on this page, having in my time kicked off a couple of trends in submissions that have really annoyed you. Also you said I could send it on Twitter, but that's our little secret until someone reads this sentence.
I seem to have accidentally gotten TalkToTransformer.com to write a Paul Gannon movie, based on his experience of pooing in various places in a bathroom where you should not poo:
Once upon I time I did a poo in the bath. And I knew I'd have to do it again," he said to the New York Daily News. "My girlfriend told me that even if it was in the tub, it wasn't good to keep doing it. So after a while I decided I'd at least do it in the shower with no water whatsoever. After I finished doing it, I was like, 'Oh my god, that is a poop movie.' "
Good one, eh?
But what if I try again? Will it be better?
Once upon I time I did a poo in the bath. I just felt like doing something fun. I think you always want to relieve that stress as much as possible. That's why I put poo in the bath, to keep all that stress out of my body. The poo helps me relax, and it helps me focus. The poo also makes me feel good."
This was also reported by Yahoo.com
If you want more insight into the subject, you can listen to this documentary entitled The Poop in the Bikini and read this piece from Men's Health.
You might also enjoy reading:
I do not think you will enjoy reading the comments.
THAT'S ALL FOR THIS WEEK'S MINIMAL EFFORT MISSIVE,
What is your favourite ever television advert both a) Games related and b) Not games related?
My two are the 90’s Weird Alien PlayStation Girl, and the largely forgotten 80’s McEwen's Beer one with the Sisiphyean ball rolling, where they break through the screen at the end to get to the pint. The production value of that advert was amazing.
J Is Manchild, Tunbridge Wells
Weirdly, despite it being a huge influence on me, it isn't a show I've watched in years, yet I'll happily put on Monty Python. WHAT'S THAT ABOUT?!
Not games-related? Uhhh... that's a tough one. I'll give you two from when I was growing up: the Unigate Milk "Watch out there's a Humphrey about" campaign, which I was so obsessed with that I even entered a fancy dress competition dressed as a milk bottle... And some cat food advert which featured a cat called Arthur from "Round the corner".
Due to this, my nan had a rubber cat in her bathroom, that became known as "Arthur round the corner".
Apropos nothing, when I'd visit my Nan she had this big box of toys she'd bring out, and among the things in there was an old, stand-up, glasses case. Like, it was all soft on the inside and you'd slip your glasses in. I just used it as a carbon freezing chamber for my Star Wars figures.
Gaming isn’t getting better.
People would point out that Grand Theft Auto 5 on current generation machines, Links Awakening on the Switch or Fortnite on every blood thing under the sun are incredible games with millions of in-game hours being played worldwide; they would also likely suggest I shut up and that I’m not a real gamer. If they’re right then I’ll accept any lambasting given but firstly, let me argue my point.
I was raised in the 80s and had a ZX Spectrum through to 1993 (at least), if I wanted to play a game then I had to put real consideration into what cassette I would lose upwards of 30 minutes of my life to just to get a game on screen; nothing was ever simple and even now, volume and tone wheels fill me with woe.
Looking back at these games I realise how many hours I put in without ever actually completing a game, but never did I feel hard done by, cheated or let down. Jet Set Willy and it’s famous bug that resulted in it being impossible to complete; this didn’t stop us playing the game, but instead saw us look at alternate ways in to the room – it made us explore the game more, hoping for a better result each time.
The 90s wasn’t much better, computer hardware was rapidly moving and games had to compete with market that saw PC specs changing monthly potentially making their game obsolete before release. To counter this, like their 80s counterparts, story lines were better and typically more thought went in to a game.
Another key aspect was the emergence of higher values of money being given as pocket money; where £1-2 was common in my teenage years, the current going pocket money rate averages out at about £8, a big difference when it comes to saving for games that cost between £20 - £30 (PC) or £30 - £50 (Console).
So summing up what I’ve already said: games from the 80s had bugs and required a lot of imagination, whilst the 90s had higher priced games, but your new PC might already be too old. Why then, would I say gaming is getting worse?
Choice isn’t always a good thing; games are so readily available now through subscription services, second-hand sellers or just lower digital price via seasonal sales. We have too much to choose from. Having this huge choice results in the ability to immediately switch between games without finishing what you started – how often do you sit down and say ‘I’m going to complete this game before I start another’?
I’m terrible for this.
I want to complete a game, especially when it grips me but when I have a pile of other games it becomes far to easy to flit between them all eventually ending in me forgetting what’s happened in one and where I’m meant to go in another. Suffice to say, this results in the game being forgotten and moved on from.
Grand Theft Auto 5 is a beautiful looking game and I do agree, I unfairly chose it as an example at the beginning of whatever this has become. It has a fantastic story line, great gameplay and looks beautiful. We are however, in a generation of consoles and hardware that people pay more attention to how ‘real’ a game looks over the gameplay.
I’ve played some truly shocking games that look beautiful but so much work has been put in to the visuals that they’ve forgotten what a storyline is. It’s this generation of games that also introduced the full price release for what is in essence, an online multiplayer game with a poorly thought out single player mission as an afterthought.
They can be fun for five minutes but thanks to micro transactions and the ability to rank up by credit card, leaves a very bitter taste when you continually spawn and die inside of 10 seconds.
Don’t get me started on the whole day one patch or DLC side of modern games. I dread plugging in the PS4 Pro for fear I’ll lose half a day to updates just to play something I own on disc.
Writing this has been hard, because ultimately the game industry needs to change but at the same time so does the gaming community.
The more we accept visuals over content, micro transactions and DLC over fully fledged games that don’t need day one patches, then the less likely the gaming market will change. Take me back to the day when what was on the disk or cassette is what I paid for and was promised, be it good or bad.
I too sometimes find the choice available - not just from games, but music and TV - a little overwhelming. When I always had to buy music, before streaming became a thing, I'd give every one of them a proper chance. Now I have a tendency to just skip to something else if I don't like an album on first listen. There's just so much clamouring for our attention.
Also, I hear you about the gaming community needing to change. Not that it will though; it has been much the same ever since I've been a part of it, it's just the landscape around it that has changed.
This very morning I saw there was a bit of a minor storm over The Last of Us Part 2, because Naughty Dog has announced that it is putting all its energies into the single-player campaign, and it won't ship with a multiplayer mode. I saw a lot of the annoyance from the multiplayer community being targeted at "casuals" - a term I'm pretty sure that Digitiser coined and popularised, much to my embarrassment, back in the 90s.
Our audience jumped on it once we started using it, and here we are 25 years later, and people still think being a "hardcore" gamer somehow elevates them over those who, y'know, have a little more going on in their lives.
Jokes on you, hardcore gamers: you're the tragic ones!! LOLZ.
Greetings Lord Biff of O. In line with your ‘brain dump’ post of today, you’ve prompted me to do two things - 1) Finally get off my arse and support you (financially as opposed to sexually) and 2) Write this rambly email to you.
First of all – I have *never* financially supported any online content creator. There’s plenty out there that I like and watch regularly (including some of the Digi-gang), but after attending the live show (more on that in a second) I felt that as soon as I was able I wanted to do my part to assist in the continued production of whatever this is.
The live show was truly something to behold - I never at any point had any clue what was going to happen next. Chunky Fringe was simply amazing to be a part of, especially at no additional expense. I was unable to sleep that evening, my brain desperately attempting to process what had happened and more intriguingly how did we get here from a 25 year-old Teletext page?
The fact that it was a labour of love for everyone concerned shone through – you screaming "FOUR BLOODY MONTHS" into the audience when the intro fucked up will stay with me for a long time.
As will the Even More Beautiful Boy (and his progeny, which sits on my c64). And the David Braben song. And so on etc etc. Even if nothing like it ever happens again I’m glad I made the trek, glad I was there for the whole day, and just grateful that you pushed yourself so far. Plus it was bloody cheap.
Secondly, and vaguely related to the current storm of feedback and comment interaction. I’ll try to keep this short and sweet.
I know what Digi means to me – in the early days I was one of the "what the hell is all of this random shit?– I just want to hear about games!" tribe. But around this time my dad introduced me to Monty Python and I realised that the absurd characters and general nature were actually the highlight of Digi.
To see it rise again in the form of The Show, and then evolve in the form of the Minis has been joyful. I *personally* prefer it when you’ve got at least one co-host (if not more) and Fat Sow ranting away in the corner but that’s just me. I have faith that whatever direction you take it in will be funny and worthwhile, as it has been up until this point.
The idea of the Saturday morning show with different sections sounds intriguing – you’ve proven on several occasions you’re able to capture that feeling of barely-contained joyful anarchy and that was a key element of those programs.
I hope that you get some rest soon and are feeling less burned out on vidyagames. I’m sure you will, and whatever happens with the channel(s) and Digi in the future will be as weird and funny as everything else that has gone on up until this point.
I would personally request the return of the Amazing Outlandish Jackets to the Minis as it feels weird to see you dressed conventionally as it were but again, that’s just me. Ignore me, and take my money.
And you'll be glad to hear we've got plans to have Fat Sow pop up in the Minis very soon. Plus other guests, and some location filming. I just need to crawl my way out of this burn-out first before I can face herding the cats.
I do really want to do another live show, but as you've identified... it kind of took it out of me. It was a ridiculous amount of organising and planning and writing, which is why doing the more ad hoc, relaxed, Minis have been a bit of a balm in recent months. Before I ever do another big, all-singing/dancing live extravaganza, it's possible I might do some smaller-scale live shows.
But don't hold me to that!
Oh, and I'll get the Chunky Fringe vids up soon. Sorry - bit behind with editing the Digi Minis, so they're taking priority.
On top of the world, looking over the edge you could see them coming. You looked too small in their big, black car to be a threat to the men in power.
Jon Clay, Taunton, Somerset
Introduced one of my friends to Digitiser (I showed them a couple episodes of Digitiser the Show, and a couple of the Digi Minis) and it's safe to say I think I've scared him a little, or at the very least confused him horribly. He didn't have any complaints though, so that's an added bonus!
Now that I'm back at uni (for my final year )I've found that the Digi Minis make for great entertainment when I'm taking a break from working on my Honours Project (which is our final year semester-long project; mine happens to be on the use of ex vivo skin models in wound healing research). I've lost count at how many times I've seen certain episodes, but yet they're still just as funny as the first time watching them!
PS: Now that the PO box is up and running, be prepared to receive some nice Scottish treats in the not too distant future!
Happy to hear your friend watched Digi without complaining though, Rhianan. That's the best we can hope for really. Here's a reveal especially for him:
I think you're good and I love you in a definitely not creepy kind of way. Like, not even a little bit creepy! At all! Honest!
Ok bye then!
Oh, you wanted a higher word count? Alright then, here are some facts about clams:
1) Clams have a heart!
2) The Grooved Carpet Shell clam is common in Mediterranean coastlines!
3) A group of clams is collectively known as a bed!
4) Clam fishing in Spain became regulated in 1935!
5) Clams can get leukemia!
Hope they cheered you up!
Bye for real now!
(Twitter - @thatbunty)
Sorry, not a proper letter, but just thought I'd follow up on last week to let you know that Galaxy's Edge (in my opinion) is amazing, and now I'd just like to move to Orlando so I can hang around there every day (which admittedly is a bit weird, and the novelty would probably wear off at some point, also, financial implications).
Anyway, I trust the Disneyland equivalent will be just as amazing and I hope you have a great time there when you go.
I'm very sorry to hear you've had a difficult year.
All the best,
Firstly, congratulations to Mrs Biffo's successful on-screen debut, following her cameo at Digi-Live during the finalé.
Secondly, Mr J (the wife) made an interesting comparison that games these days are getting too much like long-drawn out TV serieses, or movies, where unless someone was an obsessive about watching every single piece of media out there, the same could be applied to gaming.
With so many mediocre games released (to which I would include regular series releases that offer little in the way of evolution) who could, or even want to play all of them let alone write things about them!?
I rarely go anywhere near a new release these days, maybe 1-2 a year, but do find myself going back to revisit older games, probably as they are easier to get into and jump right into the action, or maybe I'm just lazy!
That episode was the most popular of our recent eps, suggesting that either people really like archeology, or they're just nosey and wanted to know what my wife is like... or are base enough to be more interested in something if a woman is in it.
It was also a lot of fun to read all the comments telling me I'm punching above my weight, but I'm sure it has done wonders for her self-esteem, and that's all that matters, I guess...
Hey Biffo, you rock!!
PS. Can you believe Gannon hasn't heard of the Fighting Fantasy books?
436) While it isn't my favourite game ever, I find it hard to name anything ahead of The Last of Us in the discussion for best game ever.
Because of this, I am greatly anticipating its imminent sequel. Barring the story and characterisation, which I think is the best the medium has to offer, the graphical detail of the environments was astounding with a level of detail I haven't seen before.
The footage shown so far of TLoU 2 seems equally impressive. To what extent do you think the visual style of The Last of Us contributed to its artistic achievements?
437) Assuming that computer game graphics advance towards genuine photorealism (yes, they've been saying that for years), do you think voice actors in games will become, relatively, much more famous than they are now?
It strikes me that the visual aspect is part of the reason why they are not better-know in general than they currently are. I am assuming, of course, that their own faces are used more often than now.
438) Do people go over-the-top with Dreamcast nostalgia? I had one and really liked it and it had many great games, especially for its lifespan. It didn't have as many good games as the PS2, no matter what the revisionists say.
439) What will be the next mainstream genre of game to become irrelevant?
440) It's all personal taste, of course, but is it surprising that there hasn't yet been a great Harry Potter game of any kind?
437) That's an interesting thought. I was watching the Star Wars Triple Force Friday live stream yesterday - where they unveiled loads of new Star Wars toys - and they had the bloke who's voice the main character in Jedi Fallen Order. His character uses his likeness as well as his voice, so it seems to be heading that way.
Even in film, we're not getting more and more actors voicing younger CGI versions of themselves; even De Niro's been de-aged for a new film, so I can see
438) I think the Dreamcast's potential was unfulfilled, so I can understand the nostalgia. Its life was cut short, but the games it had were great. So no, I don't think people necessarily go over the top about it. Well, some probably do, but they're idiots.
439) I honestly can't answer that. I certainly wish that there was more focus on story campaigns than multiplayer, but there seems to be more of a balance emerging in that regard.
440) Yeah, it is kind of surprising, I guess. The moment seems to have passed now though doesn't it? Though I dunno. The studio tour is popular, the theme park attractions remain a big draw, and there's still a shop in King's Cross Station that's always heaving, so maybe it'll be a perennial like Lord of the Rings.
Hey - who remembers when Daniel Radcliffe was in that play where he got his willy out?