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The Awful Return of The Rapping Shoe

10/11/2014

8 Comments

 
Picture

I’m the Rapping Shoe,
The self-aware loafer,
Please wear me on the street,
But don’t wipe me on your sofa.

I'm the Rapping Shoe,
My raps are sublime,
See how awesomely,
I make this bit rhyme.

I’m the Rapping Shoe,
Watch me rap about games,
I rap them so hard,
They explode into flames.

I’m the Rapping Shoe,
Now heed my word,
A burning console,
Is completely absurd.

To extinguish the fire,
There are steps you must take,
To retard the flames,
Please make no mistake.

Unplug from the wall,
It’s as easy as science,
Now get a damp cloth,
And moisten your appliance.

I’m the Rapping Shoe,
You’ve heard my advice,
I’m a UK size seven,
To be bigger would be nice.


Picture
I’m the Rapping Shoe,
You can wipe me on your doormat,
I’m not sure I work,
In this new Digi format.

I’m the Rapping Shoe,
And my raps are a crime,
I'm really struggling,
To make this stuff rhyme.

I'm the Rapping Shoe,
And I'm chill enough to know,
This scans really badly,
And the words barely flow.

I'm the Rapping Shoe,
And in all honesty,
This is probably the last time,
You will ever hear from me.

'Cause I'm the Rapping Shoe,
And I'm full of self-loathing,
I always wished I could be,
Some other form of clothing.

I'm the Rapping Shoe,
And I've got me some pills,
I'm gonna wash them down,
With my rap shoe skills.

Yo!
Picture
RIP The Rapping Shoe - 1993 - 2014
8 Comments
lilock3
29/11/2014 04:29:56 am

A tragedy... so young... so much potential. R.I.P.

Reply
(required)
29/11/2014 04:36:56 am

Will Doctor Derek Doctors be making a comeback?

Reply
Mr Biffo
29/11/2014 04:56:35 am

Poor, unloved, Rapping Shoe. And yes - Derek Doctors is on the cards. We'll get around to all the main Digi characters eventually.

Reply
PhilWal
29/11/2014 05:13:15 am

He was the Rapping Shoe,
He liked to spit beats
But now there's a void
Just above our feets.

(I'm making an assumption
That these shoes were male.
If I've misgendered
Them, please email)

His lacey lyrics
And super rhyme structure
Made us all smile
And that isn't bluster.

When rapping in battles
He was never dissed.
Now silence on the mic.
He will be missed.

'Cos the Rapping Shoe
Has finished his race.
Forever in our hearts
Requiescat in pace.

Reply
Mr Biffo
29/11/2014 05:28:24 am

<CRIES>...

Reply
Simon_l
29/11/2014 04:06:21 pm

May his sole rest in peace.

Reply
Mr Biffo
30/11/2014 02:12:07 am

Ba-dum-tish!

Reply
clarkanoid
4/12/2014 12:00:43 pm

Heel be sorely missed.

Reply



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