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THE 10 BEST DISNEY GAMES EVER - ACCORDING TO ME

7/12/2017

15 Comments

 
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It was Walt Disney's birthday yesterday. He probably wasn't celebrating it, because he's dead. Well, unless they throw parties for the frozen heads in cryogenic storage facilities.

Still, you've got to hand it to him; the feller spawned a company - and an empire - that has endured. Of course, such is the reach of Disney that it was inevitable that its tendrils would stretch into the world of video games. Admittedly, not every Disney game has been a classic - but when they've been good they've been very, very good. And when they've been bad they've been Disney Extreme Skateboarding.

​Here are ten of the better ones. 
CASTLE OF ILLUSION STARRING MICKEY MOUSE
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Pre-Sonic, Castle of Illusion was the premiere Mega Drive platformer - no surprise given that it was developed by Sega's own AM7 team. Yes, it's simplistic, and frequently frustrating, and considers it acceptable to throw apples at people you don't like, and/or sentient toadstools, but it remains one of the best-looking Mega Drive games of all time.

Notably, it began a rewarding association between Disney and the Mega Drive. Other consoles would feature Disney games, but somehow the Mega Drive felt like their home. There was a 2.5D remake of Castle of Illusion released a few years back, but it failed to recapture the charm of the 16-bit original.

On a related note, what's the deal with Mickey? He doesn't look much like any mouse I've ever seen. Why is his face hairless? If you saw a mouse with an entirely hairless face you'd think it was sick. Perhaps Mickey is sick. He's certainly sick enough to wander around in a pair of hotpants, clogs and white gloves; the clothing of a pervert. Or perhaps he shaves his entire face. Which raises questions about what else he might take a razor to...
MICKEY MANIA
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Cuphead wasn't the first platform game to put players inside a vintage cartoon; Mickey Mania took the titular mouse on a journey through a number of his most iconic animated shorts (note: not a journey inside his animated hotpants, though I'd bet he's been on a few of those) - including the black-and-white Steamboat Willie. Ha ha: willies. It wasn't quite Castle of Illusion good, but the novelty of the classic animation-inspired levels made up for it. 

Anyway, what's going on with those two buttons on Mickey's shorts? Press left for wee and right for poo, yeah?
ALADDIN
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Significantly superior to Capcom's far less-charming Super NES attempt, Virgin Interactive's Mega Drive Aladdin - from the team behind Cool Spot - is the third best-selling title in the history of the console (after the first two Sonic The Hedgehogs). And for good reason; it was a gorgeous, gorgeous game. Which you'd expect, given that the animation was handled by a team from Disney itself.

I've just realised that Aladdin is dressed like MC Hammer. That's a wholly inappropriate outfit to be wearing around a Middle Eastern marketplace. Take it from me; those guys are well touchy!

I used to work with somebody whose husband, during the first Gulf War, faxed a message to Saddam Hussein - via The Sun newspaper - which read "I was in Baghdad when you were in YOUR DAD'S BAG".

Apparently, his boss had felt this was tantamount to inviting reprisals upon his place of business, presumably from angry Saddam supporters who had somehow seen the fax and traced it back to its source. 

While everybody else was consoling her over the news, the only thing I could think to offer was: "But what was he trying to say? It doesn't even make any sense..."
THE LION KING
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Once again enlisting the help of Disney animators, Virgin's follow-up to Aladdin sported the same painstaking authenticity to the source material. It was effectively two games in one; the early stages featuring a young Simba, and the latter levels seeing him all growed-up and significantly more violent.

And talking of authenticity, the game of course boasted an interpretation of the film's soundtrack, written by Tim Rice and Elton John - the world's most African men. 

One thing it didn't incorporate was that bit where Simba flops down in a field of flowers, and all the petals and pollen float up into the sky and form the word "Sex", if you squint. Presumably this was courtesy of a Disney animator who wanted the whole world to know that sex was their favourite thing.
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EPIC MICKEY
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The Wii's Epic Mickey took its cue from Mickey Mania, dealing with the history of the mouse - and re-introducing his animated predecessor, Oswald The Lucky Rabbit - while broadening the scope to encompass Disney theme park history. Albeit, viewed through a dark, steampunk-y lens. Mostly a 3D game - Mickey was armed with a magic paintbrush, to paint away bad ink - there were also 2D levels, once again set inside old Disney cartoons. 

Unfortunately, the presence of Oswald simply raises more questions about Mickey himself, given that they sport the same black body-and-white-face. Oswald might be wearing shorts, but doesn't bother with the clogs or the gloves - making him slightly less sinister, and two-thirds more naked. How's that for mixed signals?!
KINGDOM HEARTS
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As much a new Final Fantasy RPG as a Disney game, the Kingdom Hearts series once again demonstrated Disney's own commitment to its legacy by bringing together characters from across its cinematic universe.

The third and final game in the series even introducers characters from Tron and the Pirates of the Carribean movies. They included Jack Sparrow - a role created by Johnny Depp which, as time goes on, looks increasingly like a cry for help.
QUACKSHOT
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Another great pre-Sonic Mega Drive platformer, Quackshot gave Donald Duck his moment in the spotlight. Essentially a side-scrolling shoot 'em up, Donald is armed with a gun that can fire a variety of ammunition, from sink plungers to bubble gum. Weirdly, one of the main antagonists is Dracula - the famous dude.

Donald, as has been endlessly debated, doesn't wear anything on the lower half of his body, yet remains clothed above his waist. Goofy, however - he's a dog, or something (which raises questions about the indentured servitude into Pluto has been forced) is entirely clothed. Can you imagine a party where one of your friends turned up in a shirt but no trousers or pants, and another friend nothing but a pair of hotpants, clogs and white gloves?

Do you know what sort of party that would be? That's right: a special party...
WORLD OF ILLUSION
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Essentially a sequel to Castle of Illusion, World of Illusion paired up both Donald and Mickey, and introduced puzzle elements where the two characters had to work together. In keeping with Disney's non-violent approach - rarely in the cartoons does Mickey ever stab somebody in the throat with a fork - the characters were armed with magic capes, which they could swoosh over enemies to turn them into doves. 

In some respects, that's worse than killing them outright; you might be granting them the ability to fly, but you're also dooming them to life as a bird. Could that be classed as GBH under the law?

Yes, Donald and Mickey might be able to argue that they're acting in self-defence, but surely there's some legal provision to account for their actions. Maybe not manslaughter, but at the very least it's some manner of assault.
DISNEY INFINITY
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Essentially a toy box - more or less literally, given that the physical figures you could buy allowed you to transport those characters into the game - Infinity has to be commended for its sheer breadth. Add-on packs not only allowed you to play as Disney animation characters, but - in later versions - Pixar, Star Wars, Pirates of the Caribbean, Tron, The Lone Ranger and Marvel heroes. The game worlds remained locked-off, but in Toybox mode you could play with the characters almost as action figures. 

​Not anymore of course. Disney axed the game, and has stopped making figures for it.

​Who cares?
THE BLACK CAULDRON
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Few people would remember 1986's The Black Cauldron as a classic Disney movie - arriving in the era when Disney had lost its way, and would make films about any old shit - but in the hands of Sierra On-Line, the masters of the point-and-click adventure, the story became every bit as engaging as Sierra's original titles.

It played like a King's Quest game, albeit simplified for younger audiences; many of the text commands were assigned to individual key presses, a feature that would later become standard for point-and-click titles. You know: as the younger generation got older, yet refused to do "adulting".

Want the world handed to you on a plate don't you, you entitled little pigs? 
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15 Comments
Spiney O’Sullivan
7/12/2017 10:59:41 am

For those interested in Mickey Mania (and Toy Story), the Gamehut channel on YouTube is by an (ex?) employee of Traveller’s Tales, and talks a lot in depth about how they pushed the MegaDrive’s limits to make those games do things like rotating towers, seemingly scrolling ground textures (on a console that didnmt have Mode 7!) and high-quality visuals.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfVFSjHQ57zyxajhhRc7i0g

The guy behind it is also making an updated version of Sonic 3D that might just be playable this time around.

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Biscuits
7/12/2017 11:19:52 am

Quackshot and Aladdin>the rest. Especially Quackshot. That's an amazing game that isn't discussed much for some reason.

Something I think we don't need to be concerned about: clothing genital-less characters

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Col. Asdasd
7/12/2017 11:22:59 am

Good list but a few notable omissions. No mention of Tom & Jerry? The Flintstones, hello?? Think the author's Disney knowledge might be lacking a bit.

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Paul
7/12/2017 12:26:33 pm

Jetsons, Tom & Jerry, were from Hanna Barbera. H&B did indeed start work as Disney animators (and, at the time, who didn’t), but carved their own path via Tom & Jerry, before moving on to television.

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Your mate
7/12/2017 01:24:11 pm

Ah, he's done you

Cc
8/12/2017 08:26:43 pm

You donedone mate, ha mate,,! Ha

Biskids
7/12/2017 03:04:10 pm

Anyone seen the new Mickey Mouse cartoons on Youtube? They're really good

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Jol
7/12/2017 04:17:39 pm

I have not! I have however seen clips of new Ducktales and it also looks really good. And having mentioned Ducktales I now have the theme stuck in my head.

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Meatballs-me-branch-me-do
7/12/2017 05:40:07 pm

They seem to have spent a lot of money making Ducktales look like cheap animation. The colours and everything are all washed out and unpleasant, is it meant to be some homage to the ridiculous detailed Donald Duck comic books?

Huey, Dewey and Louie are now generic obnoxious wisecracking adolescents who wear hoodies and characters stare at phones so bleh.

Spiney O’Sullivan
8/12/2017 01:07:16 am

Bring back Quack Pack!

Mrtankthreat
7/12/2017 03:11:08 pm

I loved the Black Cauldron when I was a kid. I had a book of the movie and the screen shots looked amazing from what I can remember. A few years ago my ma got me the dvd and the animation and art work looked way worse than I remembered. I was really disappointed.

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Jol
7/12/2017 04:15:51 pm

The Mega Drive Disney games were the mutt's nuts (which my own mutt regularly reminds me are a good thing by repeatedly licking the area they used to occupy while eyeballing me).

It seems that Disney's best games coincided with their best movies, and it's always a treat to have a tie-in live up to the source material, like Goldeneye and Cutthroat Island.

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John Veness
7/12/2017 04:25:46 pm

"YOUR DAD'S BAG" = scrotum?

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Mega Man from the computer game
7/12/2017 04:58:37 pm

Yeah, surely...I don't know if Biffo is kidding as he seems like he would up on scrote terms

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All Man, And No Bag
7/12/2017 09:31:07 pm

I suspect this anecdote may be Biffo’s way of telling us that he’s since worked it out.




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