Unfortunately, Digitiser2000 will be a little quieter than you're used to over the next couple of weeks. An exhausted Mr Biffo is being dragged away to have his software reinstalled.
However, because you are so loved, there will still be things to read across the coming fortnight - including several editions of The Digitiser2000 Letters Page, some guest posts from Super Bad Advice, and a feature or two. Keep checking in every day. You never know what might arise.
In the meantime, here's everything that has been on the site over the past month - the weight of which might give you some clue as to Biffo's levels of profound mental fatigue. You can't say you don't get your money's worth. Especially those of you who don't give us any money.
Please share anything you enjoy on here. It all helps to keep Digitiser2000 going.
Happy Foetus!
However, because you are so loved, there will still be things to read across the coming fortnight - including several editions of The Digitiser2000 Letters Page, some guest posts from Super Bad Advice, and a feature or two. Keep checking in every day. You never know what might arise.
In the meantime, here's everything that has been on the site over the past month - the weight of which might give you some clue as to Biffo's levels of profound mental fatigue. You can't say you don't get your money's worth. Especially those of you who don't give us any money.
Please share anything you enjoy on here. It all helps to keep Digitiser2000 going.
Happy Foetus!
MOST WANTED: 21 GENUINE POLICE SUSPECT IMAGES
Do you recognise these crims?
INTRODUCING JEJU LOVE LAND - SOUTH KOREA'S FINEST THEME PARK
The rudest park on earth!
UNBEARABLE: WHEN INDIE DEVELOPERS CAN'T COPE - BY MR BIFFO
The sad saga of Bear Simulator's developer.
INTRODUCING BONBON LAND - DENMARK'S FINEST THEME PARK!
Vomiting rats abound.
FABLE LEGENDS IS NO MORE... SO WHAT DOES IT MEAN? - BY MR BIFFO
What happens when a AAA game is cancelled?
PLAYING TO THE CROWD: WHY CROWDFUNDING IS BOTH GREAT AND AWFUL - BY MR BIFFO
The ups and downs of giving money to strangers.
THE HIDDEN LINKS BETWEEN VIDEO GAMES AND FOCKSES
Keep your wits about you - the fockses are coming.
15 OF THE WORST GAME COVERS OF ALL TIME
A gallery of abominations.
WE ASKED THESE TOP GAME DESIGNERS IF THEY'D EVER EATEN THEIR OWN POO AND NOT A SINGLE ONE REPLIED
Shameful. What are they hiding?
IF YOU RECEIVED £100 EVERY TIME YOU PRESSED A BUTTON WOULD YOU STILL DO IT EVEN IF IT MEANT A GAMES JOURNALIST DIED?
It's the ultimate moral dilemma!
TOUGH LOVE: DID POLITICAL CORRECTNESS TRIGGER THE TRIGGERING? - BY MR BIFFO
More unpleasant online nonsense. Dd we bring it on ourselves?
WHICH ONE OF THESE GAMERGATERS HAS A SECRET STASH OF FRENCH CREPES?
Courting controversy.
REVIEW: BEAR SIMULATOR (PC/MAC)
Be a bear. Albeit not a very good bear.
WILL THESE 21 HARROWING PHOTOS OF KIDS IN MASKS SOLVE THE MYSTERY OF WHY HIDEO KOJIMA LEFT KONAMI?
The clues are all there.
REVIEW-IN-PROGRESS: HAVE A LOOK AT THESE SHITTING BABIES WHILE I TELL YOU WHAT I THINK OF THE PS4 VERSION OF 'TOM CLANCY'S THE DIVISION' THUS FAR
The review that you always wanted.
TOM CLANCY'S THE DIVISION - SCREENSHOT GALLERY
Highlights from Biffo's time with The Division.
NICE GRAPHICS: A SMALL CELEBRATION - BY MR BIFFO
From Seiddab Attack to Tom Clancy.
YOU BE THE DETECTIVE: CAN YOU WORK OUT WHO MURDERED UBISOFT BOSS YVES GUILLEMOT?
It's CSI: Digitiser!
10 THINGS EVERY NINETIES GAMER REMEMBERS
A trip down Memory Lane.
HERE ARE 10 VITAL THINGS EVERY GAMER SHOULD KNOW ABOUT THEIR CONSUMER RIGHTS... BUT FOR SOME REASON WE'VE PLACED THEM IN A GALLERY OF CHILDREN WITH DISGUSTING SNOT BUBBLES, WHICH IN RETROSPECT MIGHT'VE BEEN A MISTAKE
Our least popular feature ever!
10 WEIRD ATARI 2600 GAMES THAT MIGHT'VE BEEN EVEN WORSE THAN E.T.
Yes- worse than The Worst Game Ever.
A PAIN IN THE AESTHETICS: A 20-YEAR MYSTERY SOLVED - BY MR BIFFO
Mr Biffo finally realises what he wants.
WHAT WOULD YOU RATHER HAVE: HALF-LIFE 3 OR YOUR OWN ROBOTIC SERVANT?
We lay out the case for both.
NINTENDO NX AND PLAYSTATION VR: A TALE OF TWO TECHNOLOGIES - BY MR BIFFO
Which one is the future, and which is the past?
HERE'S EVERYTHING PEOPLE AND DOGS NEED TO KNOW ABOUT PLAYSTATION VR - PLUS TEN DOGS WHO WILL INDICATE HOW EXCITED YOU SHOULD BE ABOUT IT
Biffo is finally sold on VR - and so are these dogs.
GAMES OF MY YEARS: VIRTUAL REALITY - BY MR BIFFO
Boffo recalls the 90s VR craze.
WE ASKED THESE 10 VIDEO GAME VOICE ACTORS IF THEY'D LIKE TO ACCOMPANY US TO A FIELD, WHERE WE COULD SPEND HOURS STRAINING TOGETHER UNTIL ONE OF US PRODUCED AN EGG - AND NOT A SINGLE ONE DID
A shocking lack of responses.
COULD THESE BE THE 20 MOST DEPRESSING PLAYGROUNDS IN THE WORLD?
Have your Prozac to hand.
GAMES OF MY YEARS: GAME BOY - BY MR BIFFO
Nintendo's handheld lovely.
SAD BUT TRUE: THIS GALLERY OF POO GRAFFITI WAS PUT TOGETHER BY A MAN IN HIS FORTIES
This will break your heart.
21 EXAMPLES OF THE WEIRDEST EVER SONIC FAN ART
Sonic the Hedgehog has the strangest fans.
WE ASKED THESE GAMES BOSSES IF THEY'D CHANGE THEIR COMPANY NAME TO "FARTZONE", AND ONLY ONE OF THEM BOTHERED TO REPLY
At least we got one reply this time.
THESE 10 GENUINE FACTS ABOUT SHIGERU MIYAMOTO ARE SO BORING THAT NOT EVEN THESE KIDS CAN STAY AWAKE
Tedious beyond compare.
INTRODUCING THE WORLD'S ONLY TOILET-THEMED RESTAURANT CHAIN
Eat brown food from toilet bowls.
GAMES CONSOLE COSPLAYERS - WITH COMMENTS FROM CHART CAT
More fruity fun from Chart Cat.
REVIEW: TOM CLANCY'S THE DIVISION (PS4/XBOX ONE/PC)
Finally - the actual review!
THE DIGITISER2000 LETTERS PAGE
Did you make it through the selection process?
MAN DIARY - WEDNESDAY 23RD MARCH 2016
The Man goes to The Moon.
VIDEO GAMES MADE ME TELEPATHIC - BY MR BIFFO
Boffo thinks games make him psychic.
13 THINGS THAT MIGHT'VE INSPIRED THE NINTENDO NX CONTROLLER
Is the shiny black thing for real?
THE JIM STERLING SAGA
Worth reading in the order presented here, Mr Biffo gives you an insight into Jim Sterling vs Digital Homicide - and his own rescuing tendencies...
JIM STERLING'S BEING SUED FOR $10 MILLION AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT - BY MR BIFFO
JIM STERLING: THE BEST MODERN GAMES JOURNALISM HAS TO OFFER? OR A VULGAR, PATRONISING EMBARRASSMENT? - BY MR BIFFO
JIM STERLING VS DIGITAL HOMICIDE... WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON? - BY MR BIFFO
JIM STERLING: A CODA
Do you recognise these crims?
INTRODUCING JEJU LOVE LAND - SOUTH KOREA'S FINEST THEME PARK
The rudest park on earth!
UNBEARABLE: WHEN INDIE DEVELOPERS CAN'T COPE - BY MR BIFFO
The sad saga of Bear Simulator's developer.
INTRODUCING BONBON LAND - DENMARK'S FINEST THEME PARK!
Vomiting rats abound.
FABLE LEGENDS IS NO MORE... SO WHAT DOES IT MEAN? - BY MR BIFFO
What happens when a AAA game is cancelled?
PLAYING TO THE CROWD: WHY CROWDFUNDING IS BOTH GREAT AND AWFUL - BY MR BIFFO
The ups and downs of giving money to strangers.
THE HIDDEN LINKS BETWEEN VIDEO GAMES AND FOCKSES
Keep your wits about you - the fockses are coming.
15 OF THE WORST GAME COVERS OF ALL TIME
A gallery of abominations.
WE ASKED THESE TOP GAME DESIGNERS IF THEY'D EVER EATEN THEIR OWN POO AND NOT A SINGLE ONE REPLIED
Shameful. What are they hiding?
IF YOU RECEIVED £100 EVERY TIME YOU PRESSED A BUTTON WOULD YOU STILL DO IT EVEN IF IT MEANT A GAMES JOURNALIST DIED?
It's the ultimate moral dilemma!
TOUGH LOVE: DID POLITICAL CORRECTNESS TRIGGER THE TRIGGERING? - BY MR BIFFO
More unpleasant online nonsense. Dd we bring it on ourselves?
WHICH ONE OF THESE GAMERGATERS HAS A SECRET STASH OF FRENCH CREPES?
Courting controversy.
REVIEW: BEAR SIMULATOR (PC/MAC)
Be a bear. Albeit not a very good bear.
WILL THESE 21 HARROWING PHOTOS OF KIDS IN MASKS SOLVE THE MYSTERY OF WHY HIDEO KOJIMA LEFT KONAMI?
The clues are all there.
REVIEW-IN-PROGRESS: HAVE A LOOK AT THESE SHITTING BABIES WHILE I TELL YOU WHAT I THINK OF THE PS4 VERSION OF 'TOM CLANCY'S THE DIVISION' THUS FAR
The review that you always wanted.
TOM CLANCY'S THE DIVISION - SCREENSHOT GALLERY
Highlights from Biffo's time with The Division.
NICE GRAPHICS: A SMALL CELEBRATION - BY MR BIFFO
From Seiddab Attack to Tom Clancy.
YOU BE THE DETECTIVE: CAN YOU WORK OUT WHO MURDERED UBISOFT BOSS YVES GUILLEMOT?
It's CSI: Digitiser!
10 THINGS EVERY NINETIES GAMER REMEMBERS
A trip down Memory Lane.
HERE ARE 10 VITAL THINGS EVERY GAMER SHOULD KNOW ABOUT THEIR CONSUMER RIGHTS... BUT FOR SOME REASON WE'VE PLACED THEM IN A GALLERY OF CHILDREN WITH DISGUSTING SNOT BUBBLES, WHICH IN RETROSPECT MIGHT'VE BEEN A MISTAKE
Our least popular feature ever!
10 WEIRD ATARI 2600 GAMES THAT MIGHT'VE BEEN EVEN WORSE THAN E.T.
Yes- worse than The Worst Game Ever.
A PAIN IN THE AESTHETICS: A 20-YEAR MYSTERY SOLVED - BY MR BIFFO
Mr Biffo finally realises what he wants.
WHAT WOULD YOU RATHER HAVE: HALF-LIFE 3 OR YOUR OWN ROBOTIC SERVANT?
We lay out the case for both.
NINTENDO NX AND PLAYSTATION VR: A TALE OF TWO TECHNOLOGIES - BY MR BIFFO
Which one is the future, and which is the past?
HERE'S EVERYTHING PEOPLE AND DOGS NEED TO KNOW ABOUT PLAYSTATION VR - PLUS TEN DOGS WHO WILL INDICATE HOW EXCITED YOU SHOULD BE ABOUT IT
Biffo is finally sold on VR - and so are these dogs.
GAMES OF MY YEARS: VIRTUAL REALITY - BY MR BIFFO
Boffo recalls the 90s VR craze.
WE ASKED THESE 10 VIDEO GAME VOICE ACTORS IF THEY'D LIKE TO ACCOMPANY US TO A FIELD, WHERE WE COULD SPEND HOURS STRAINING TOGETHER UNTIL ONE OF US PRODUCED AN EGG - AND NOT A SINGLE ONE DID
A shocking lack of responses.
COULD THESE BE THE 20 MOST DEPRESSING PLAYGROUNDS IN THE WORLD?
Have your Prozac to hand.
GAMES OF MY YEARS: GAME BOY - BY MR BIFFO
Nintendo's handheld lovely.
SAD BUT TRUE: THIS GALLERY OF POO GRAFFITI WAS PUT TOGETHER BY A MAN IN HIS FORTIES
This will break your heart.
21 EXAMPLES OF THE WEIRDEST EVER SONIC FAN ART
Sonic the Hedgehog has the strangest fans.
WE ASKED THESE GAMES BOSSES IF THEY'D CHANGE THEIR COMPANY NAME TO "FARTZONE", AND ONLY ONE OF THEM BOTHERED TO REPLY
At least we got one reply this time.
THESE 10 GENUINE FACTS ABOUT SHIGERU MIYAMOTO ARE SO BORING THAT NOT EVEN THESE KIDS CAN STAY AWAKE
Tedious beyond compare.
INTRODUCING THE WORLD'S ONLY TOILET-THEMED RESTAURANT CHAIN
Eat brown food from toilet bowls.
GAMES CONSOLE COSPLAYERS - WITH COMMENTS FROM CHART CAT
More fruity fun from Chart Cat.
REVIEW: TOM CLANCY'S THE DIVISION (PS4/XBOX ONE/PC)
Finally - the actual review!
THE DIGITISER2000 LETTERS PAGE
Did you make it through the selection process?
MAN DIARY - WEDNESDAY 23RD MARCH 2016
The Man goes to The Moon.
VIDEO GAMES MADE ME TELEPATHIC - BY MR BIFFO
Boffo thinks games make him psychic.
13 THINGS THAT MIGHT'VE INSPIRED THE NINTENDO NX CONTROLLER
Is the shiny black thing for real?
THE JIM STERLING SAGA
Worth reading in the order presented here, Mr Biffo gives you an insight into Jim Sterling vs Digital Homicide - and his own rescuing tendencies...
JIM STERLING'S BEING SUED FOR $10 MILLION AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT - BY MR BIFFO
JIM STERLING: THE BEST MODERN GAMES JOURNALISM HAS TO OFFER? OR A VULGAR, PATRONISING EMBARRASSMENT? - BY MR BIFFO
JIM STERLING VS DIGITAL HOMICIDE... WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON? - BY MR BIFFO
JIM STERLING: A CODA
Send emails to us here: digitiser2000@gmail.com
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