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REVIEW: NINTENDO CLASSIC MINI

3/1/2017

25 Comments

 
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I had a pretty decent haul of gifts this Christmas. Partly, this was because I kept buying myself stuff and asking my other half to wrap it up for me, and this is why I am now so poor.

One of the things I did get, which I'd almost forgotten asking for - though, let's face it, I was so ill over Christmas that I'd forgotten most of my name - was this: a Nintendo Classic Mini. That's the official name - you know it better as the NES Mini, the shrunk-down version of the Nintendo Entertainment System. That's correct: the one with 30 games stuffed into its guts.

A few people have been a bit sniffy about the NES Mini (I'm steadfast in calling it that, in the hope that they'll do a SNES Mini), because all of the games are already available on the Nintendo Store.

Or - let's face it - freely available online.

Or because they think scoffing at popular things makes them look cool.

​Plus, some people have even made their own miniature NES out of a Raspberry Pi, and believe that being able to do that makes them better than the rest of us.

​Well, bully for all of them, the bunch of sneering, arrogant elitists. The second I laid eyes on the NES Mini I wanted one, and now I have one, and it's one of my favourite things ever, and I don't even feel the need to show off about it.

How do you like them apples?
NES WORK IF YOU CAN GET IT
See, I never owned a Nintendo Entertainment System. I wanted one, but for some reason you just couldn't get them round my way.

Indeed, the only time I ever saw one for sale was in Harrods. I never shopped in Harrods, other than browsing at Christmas with my family, so it must've been a Christmas trip into London. And probably close enough to Christmas that it was too late to add anything to my list.

There was a display set up with a NES, a R.O.B. and the light gun, and it all looked pretty damn cool, and I definitely wanted one... so Hootie alone knows why, when I finally had some disposable income, I bought a Sega Master System. ​

But hey - thanks to Nintendo's proud dedication to its own back catalogue now I do have one at last, albeit in a version that's almost small enough to wear as a belt buckle.

Although... when I did attempt that, my trousers fell down in the opticians, and I was so embarrassed I did a big blow-off, and made all the glasses fall off the shelves.
GOOD AND BAD
Here are the bad things about the NES Mini (or - ha ha - "Nintendo Wee"):
  • There's only one controller. But that's pretty standard for any console.
  • The controller lead is ridiculously short (though the leads which plug into the TV are long enough that you can have the NES Mini on the sofa next to you).
  • There's no way to quit out of games without pressing reset.
  • You can't add more games to it. 
  • It doesn't come with a power plug. There's a USB power cable, but nothing to plug it into. 
  • These are mostly minor issues - apart from the power supply one... but - hey - that's amore (Nintendo)!

Here are the good things:
  • 30 games (assorted Marios, two Zeldas, Metroid, two Castlevanias, two Donkey Kongs, a Kirby, Balloon Fight, Bubble Bobble, Excitebike - and more) with scarcely a duffer amid them.
  • You can save your games!​
  • You can play in pixel perfect mode, or choose the option which replicates the display of an old CRT TV screen. 
  • It's fairly cheap.
  • It's just so cute! 

The good outweighs the bad. I really, really, really like the NES Mini. I like how tactile it is. I like how it feels and smells authentic. And I like all of the games on there, apart from the American football one. 

SUMMARY: NES one, Cyril... NES one, son!
​SCORE: Loads.


FROM THE ARCHIVE:
WHAT'S WRONG WITH BEING SEXY? - BY MR BIFFO
10 BIZARRE NES GAMES THAT WE SWEAR WE DIDN'T MAKE UP
MARCH OF THE CRAPSOLES: 10 CONSOLE KNOCK-OFFS

25 Comments
Stoo
3/1/2017 01:30:57 pm

I've been meaning to make my own retro-machine with a Raspberry Pi. But I still kind of want one of these, just to have an option that doesn't require any technical faffing around. I could just plug it into a TV and enjoy some Castlevania.

That said it still seems to only be available for £100+ from ebay scalpers, and it's not worth that much to me.

Reply
helpful henry
3/1/2017 03:40:19 pm

Just get an emulator (free) and an HDMI cable (£1) and a PC controller (varies but about £10) and plug your laptop into your telly

Reply
Stoo
3/1/2017 04:35:51 pm

yeah, could just do that. This feels more authentic, closer to the original feeling of playing on a NES (whilst still having a bit of modern convenience). That of course may not be entirely rational of me...

Clive peppard
3/1/2017 01:32:29 pm

Tacticle? TACTICLE??

is this the level of spelling and grammar we can expect in 17 Bifster?

(Happy New Year, ima bit jealous)

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Mr Biffo
3/1/2017 01:38:25 pm

Yes!

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RichardM
3/1/2017 01:34:56 pm

I want one. I covet yours... but I categorically will not pay the scalpers £100. Come on, Nintendo. Get them back on the shelves.

Seconding your vote for a SNES mini, too. As long as it's a proper SNES and not the weird looking American one. And a Mega Drive Mini too? Too much to hope for, 2017?

Reply
Kelvin Green link
3/1/2017 09:19:48 pm

Eighty built-in games and has a slot for Mega Drive cartridges:

http://www.argos.co.uk/product/3816789

Reply
Da5e
4/1/2017 02:21:03 pm

DO NOT BUY THE ARGOS MEGADRIVE, THERE.

It is remarkably terrible.

Kelvin Green link
4/1/2017 07:57:09 pm

Please sir, what is wrong with it?

I haven't bought one but I was thinking about it.

Da5e
5/1/2017 04:59:10 pm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AG6G0zC6Ago - this video should convince you. Skip to 1.50, it is embarrassing how bad the emulation is.

I had a go with one in a pub in Nottingham and thought I'd had someone slip ketamine in my drink.

Kelvin Green link
5/1/2017 08:40:03 pm

Oh dear, that is sad.

Andrew
3/1/2017 02:05:17 pm

typo alert: glasses fall off the shelvbes

Reply
Mr Biffo
3/1/2017 02:09:01 pm

How do you know that isn't what I meant, eh? Eh?

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Darren link
3/1/2017 03:03:30 pm

It's just a nice thing to have - even on an aesthetic level. If you are not playing it, it doubles as a mini-model of the NES. Roll on SNES Mini, eh?

Reply
Captain Whoops
3/1/2017 03:22:10 pm

I would love mine if only the sound wasn't a bit iffy on my telly, it's as if it isn't quite in time and randomly speeds up when beats are missed.

Oh I dunno, probably too much Sexy Christmas USA

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Adam
3/1/2017 04:12:44 pm

No plug? Really? I remember having to get my dad to wire a plug onto the lead when my original NES came plugless. But this is taking things a bit far in this day and age.

Reply
Meatballs-me-Branch-me-do
3/1/2017 04:21:32 pm

I fail to see the point of any of these things when emulation is not only free but allows access to a lot more games as opposed to whichever ones the mini console maker likes/has the legal right to distribute.

I mean, even Nintendo can't sell their legendary 1989 version of Tetris for the Game Boy right now because Ubisoft has the licence for Tetris.

Reply
Dirty Barry
3/1/2017 05:30:40 pm

If only they'd included the ability to download games or better still had an SD card slot for the ROMs of your choice.

Tempting looking little machine, but I've owned most of these games on multiple formats so it's not worth it to me personally.

Reply
Spiney O'Sullivan
4/1/2017 02:38:11 pm

I think the appeal is that some people thinking paying for content is fair.

Reply
Power Glove
3/1/2017 05:31:28 pm

The NES was my 1st love. In the house we had a spectrum and much as I wanted to love it, I couldn't.

I bought a magazine (Mean Machines, possibly) that had a preview for a game called 'The Legend of Zelda'.... Oh my, I wanted me some of that.
I pestered my mum and for Christmas I got it with A GOLD CARTRIDGE along with the console.
I've lost count how many times I've played through that game and to this day I love it absolutely. Indeed I love the NES and, like you, couldn't wait to get a NES MINI.
Yes, the lead's too short but WTF, it's just so canny!
I don't really have anything interesting to add but yes, Nintendo FTW.

They're bound to do a SNES MINI. Like the Japanese NES, the US SNES looked wildly different... let me just have a quick check to see if they did a Famicom MINI....

OH YES THEY DID!

Awesome, then there's no reason why they won't.
Count your chickens, Mr Biffo!

I always hated saying SNES (SNEZ) - horrible.

Reply
Mr Jonny T
3/1/2017 05:41:16 pm

I really wanted one of these - but missed the initial pre-order and be damned if i'm paying over £100 for one.

Although I did get a Nintendo gift for Christmas - my Wife bought me 10 shares in Nintendo. Apparently it doesn't give me much sway in the company though :(

Reply
Pi guy
3/1/2017 07:15:33 pm

I love the look of the nes mini but can't help think of it as novelty. The raspberry pi in my opinion is a much better option as you can use a Bluetooth controller of your choice or most USB controllers. There are too many negatives for me with the nes and although the controllers are retro cool they are awful for long gaming sessions. Having said all that I probably will buy one but only to strip it out and use it for a case for the raspberry pi.

Reply
Rufio1980
3/1/2017 08:22:54 pm

If anyone's thinking of going down the emulator route, I'd recommend getting a 8bitdo NES30 Bluetooth pad. It's a bang on replica of an old NES pad (you'd think it was made by Nintendo themselves!), but has extra buttons so you can play SNES games as well.

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Chinny Hill
3/1/2017 11:41:14 pm

Or you just get a Pi and a knock off controller.

Reply
Shinnos link
5/1/2017 11:22:39 am

"See, I never owned a Nintendo Entertainment System. I wanted one, but for some reason you just couldn't get them round my way."

Which is the same reason that I don't have a NES Mini. :(

Reply



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