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REVIEW: DEAD OR ALIVE 5 - LAST ROUND (PS4/Xbox One)

2/3/2015

5 Comments

 
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It must be weird being the blokes - and, for the sake of argument, let's just assume they're all men - behind the Dead or Alive franchise. All that subtle and nuanced detail you work on, and your beat 'em up ends up being overshadowed (literally) by quivering, mountainous, mammary glands.

Ask anyone who knows anything about DoA, and the first thing they'll say is "Boobs". However accomplished the gameplay, however good a DoA game might actually be, nobody seems to see beyond the breasts. 

But then, if you will put enormous, pendulous, wobbling, inhumanly large tatt-ays in your game - and affix them to characterless mannequins - what do you expect? 

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LOVELY BABS
We suppose it's a bit like all that subtext about third world debt which was snuck into the Carry On films; nobody remembers that, just Barbara Windsor's bra flying off. 

But so shameless has the DoA franchise become, that Dead or Alive 5: Last Round has an option that allows you to adjust just how much the game's breasts jiggle. We can't pretend we were enormously offended - so plastic and un-emotive are the characters anyway that they're anything but "sexy" - but it does all seem slightly unnecessary in the current climate.

However, when speaking to Weekly Famitsu, producer Yosuke Hayashi seemed rather proud of the attention to bosoms in the next-gen update: "We call the technology we used to advance skin and breast physics the 'Softness Engine'. Once you see it on the new consoles, you won't be able to go back." 

Well, now we have seen it, we probably still could go back... but we can confirm that this is indeed the wobbliest of all the Dead or Alive games.


DRESSING UP

Not that you really care, but DoA 5: Last Round features everything from DoA 5: Ultimate, as well as new, even more sexist, costumes, plus customisable hair, two new characters, and a couple of new stages. 

What that translates to is 30+ characters (including appearances from a handful from Sega's Virtua Fighter franchise... oh, how the mighty have fallen) - the majority of them skimpily-dressed, large-breasted, girls. You know how these things go by now. You don't need us to drag it out. Part beat 'em up, part Barbie doll dressing up box... basically, Freud would have a field day.

Oddly, we've always liked the DoA series because we find it a lot easier to play than many other fighting games. We're not hardcore beat 'em up fans - we're cack-handed incompetents, frankly - and DoA is exactly the sort of entry-level game that we can more or less handle. It's just a bit of a shame, especially given the accusations of inherent sexism levelled at the games industry these days, that DoA seems to wobble right into the critics' hands. 

There's a good game in here... and it'd still be a good game without the stretched-to-snapping-point bikinis. But then, they'd have to find some other USP, and it's probably a bit late for that. This is the fighting game which has the big boobs, and - rightly or wrongly - Tecmo is utterly unapologetic about that.

SUMMARY: Virtua Fighter - Swimsuit Edition.
OVERALL: 64DD out of 100DD

FROM THE ARCHIVE:
  • REVIEW: The Order 1886 (PS4)
  • REVIEW: Evolve (PS4/Xbox One/PC)
  • REVIEW: Dying Light (PS4/Xbox One)
5 Comments
optimark prime
2/3/2015 01:51:00 am

I'm poor at fighting games too, so Dead or Alive 2 on Dreamcast, with it's intuitive counter attacking machanics, meant even I could win some games!

As you rightly say, a very good fighting game is overshadowed by the ridiculous woman characters, and their outfits/hooters.

The score made me lol, btw. The sort of thing that makes Digi special :)

Reply
Like Brendle
2/3/2015 11:03:05 am

One of my proudest moments was beating my (obsessed and much practiced) friends at Tekken by button mashing like a confused idiot.
It seems complicated combos and intricate button presses are no match for a hyped up giggling mattoid!

Reply
binhoker link
2/3/2015 03:04:42 pm

the designer on the first few DoA games ( and xbox ninja gaiden games) got the boot for sticking his fingers into the maw of an unwilling female employee.

Thats a thing that happened.


Reply
Rivhard Hugues
3/3/2015 12:06:20 am

Being allowed to adjust how much wobble there is is, sadly, not new to this franchise.
A previous version i played (cant remember which one now, but it was some years ago) also allowed you to adjust the 'jubbling', which is a satisfying word to say, at least.

Reply
Mr Biffo
3/3/2015 11:29:50 am

We know, we know... everyone keeps telling us. :-(

Reply



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