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PLAYING GAMES ONLINE IS SAD AND TRAGIC - by Mr Biffo

22/3/2017

69 Comments

 
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Back when playing games online first became a thing, I resisted it for a long, long time. Well, sort of. In the Digitiser office we'd sometimes go online to play a certain multiplayer RPG - a multi-user dungeon, I suppose - with the express intention of not taking it seriously and annoying the other players...

For some reason, this seemed to annoy many of the other players, but I had a great time on there. Unfortunately, when it came to, say, 1999's Quake III Arena, I just didn't see the appeal in shooting at strangers. I bought into the hype and excitement, but when I played it... I couldn't see the appeal. It baffled me what people saw in playing against strangers, and to a certain degree it still does.

Up until then, it had always been about the split-screen multiplayer; Goldeneye, or Perfect Dark, or Mario Kart, or Micro Machines, or... y'know. Stuff you could play with mates, in the same room, at the same time.

I couldn't fathom why anybody would go on to that new-fangled Internet thing to play games against people they didn't know. Where were the hoots to be had? It felt to me as if it was merely about proving something to yourself - an early indication of that tedious "git gud" mentality, which seems to have vomited all over modern gaming like an adolescent immediately following their first pint of lager.

I didn't really get into online shooters in a big way until the Xbox 360. For a while, a bunch of my mates and I all had a 360, and playing the most recent Halo or Call of Duty became a way of socialising between the gaps in our busy lives. I knew I was never that good, but that wasn't the point; none of us were. 

​When my more casual gamer friends drifted away, and I was left with a more hardcore gamer mate or two to play with online, I also ended up finding more enjoyable ways to spend my time than being continually shot by snickering teenagers or adults who really needed to take a long hard look at themselves. 

​There have been exceptions - last year, I enjoyed Overwatch and The Division - but I've never wanted (or, more to the point, needed) to git gud.
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NOT SWITCH
This isn't going to be yet another Nintendo Switch puff piece, but the Switch serves as a perfect illustration of what I'm talking about. In designing the Switch to have two joypads and a portable screen, they're speaking directly to those of us for whom local multiplayer is the only true multiplayer. Out of the box, the Switch is ready to offer that.

​Let's face it, whether you're playing Titanfall 2, or Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare, or World of Warcraft... unless you're chatting to mates over a headset, you might as well be playing against a computer. For those of us who don't need to feel validated by coming top of a leaderboard of other human beings, for being better at doing something which has absolutely no useful real-world application, it's profoundly abstract.

Local multiplayer is becoming an integral part of the Nintendo philosophy - Pokemon Go was as much a real-world social experience as it was a game. 1-2-Switch demands players look at one another. I'm beginning to think that this - local multiplayer - might be the real USP of the Switch, even more than its big telly/handheld functionality. Nintendo seems to be railing against the way we're all becoming disconnected - wanting to use its technology to bring us closer together, rather than driving a wedge.

Outside of Nintendo, local multiplayer barely exists anymore. Halo 5 and Destiny didn't even have split-screen, and when it appears in Call of Duty and Star Wars Battlefront and the like, it feels like a begrudging afterthought.

The focus  is almost always on encouraging players to spend as much time online as possible in a bid to improve their skills; the only way of unlocking the best weapons, gear, and perks, is through repetition and grind. 

I have found myself alienated by it. It has turned gaming into a form of constant practice and improvement, rather than something which serves primarily to entertain. The mentality of it is wholly contrary to what I seek from a game. 
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GIT BAD
I get that everyone needs what they need from the games they choose to play. I get that we're all different.

Online shooters and RPGs only really come into their own with me when I'm playing them alongside close friends. Nevertheless, as tragic as it might be, I appreciate that for some gamers, "pwning n00bs", being rewarded with trinkets and the validation of meaningless achievements, is what they seek, and what they need. Maybe it's about power or feeling in control or something. I dunno.

I've had some really, really big laughs playing with friends online, but never has it come close to the experience of playing Micro Machines or Worms with someone I'm sat next to. Unless you're prepared to put in the hours to get the best gear and abilities, online gaming can be a soul-destroying experience, which mostly only rewards the "gud".

That mentality has infected gaming for too long - the arrogant, snide, elitism of those who are better, who look down their acne-pocked noses at those of us who'd rather enjoy ourselves in a way which doesn't require bettering somebody else.

When you pick away at that sneering arrogance, it merely suggests that these people, these elites, have nothing better to do with their lives than spend their entire time in pretend worlds, firing pretend guns at the pretend avatars of other people, with the primary aim of proving to themselves that they're better than those people.

​It's not something anybody should be boasting about, and were it not so damned annoying I'd potentially feel sorry for them.

It had felt for a long time as if gaming was going entirely in one direction - that it was Play Games Online Or Nothing. Nintendo, because they are ancient and wise, have drawn a line in the sand, and want to remind us of the fun you can have playing games against people who are in the same room; that you don't need to be "gud" to enjoy yourself.

You just need to be able to hold a joypad.
FROM THE ARCHIVE:
I HATE MY BOSS - BY MR BIFFO
MASTER CHIEF: A SPARTAN PERSONALITY BY MR BIFFO
IT PEGGLES THE MIND by Mr Biffo
69 Comments
Waynan The Barbarian
22/3/2017 09:17:34 am

Yes, Mr Biffo! Yes! This!
I feel exactly the same on this subject.
I've never understood the whole online experience.
As you said yourself, you may as well be playing against the computer.
A work colleague of mine buys every Call of Duty going just to play multiplayer. HE HASN'T EVEN TOUCHED THE CAMPAIGNS!
He just doesn't play them! It baffles me beyond belief!

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Kestrel
22/3/2017 06:43:22 pm

I never enjoyed call of duty campaigns, only ever played to help my friend get past bits he was stuck on, allways just seemed like wave after wave of dumb enemies to shoot as you went from A to B.

Had lots of fun with the modern warfares online though, we would take it in turns playing free for all (see anyone kill them no capturing flags and the like). There was the competitiveness between the 3 or 4 of us to see who could do best and also the fact you could come up against people who are good, people who sit in corners to pissyou off, littke kids going nuts on the mic etc, i enjoyed the variety.

I owned MW2 and 3 and the first black ops in the end and never played the campaigns. Rented black ops 2 from lovefilm and it was terrible and tried my friends version of ghosts and thought that was terrible too, haven't played call of duty since.

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Frank
22/3/2017 09:30:54 am

Have to wonder why people didn't take to the Wii U which was the champion of resolving the idea of being "alone together" and local multiplayer, certainly relative to Switch which seems to have popularised a retrograded version of the Wii U. Online adolescent elitist mentality in PC gaming is reserved for certain 'populist' games that are typically console ports--so most of them--(CoD and the like). Back in the day, arena shooters fostered a better community spirit from my experience. Co-op shooters like the Borderlands games can really show how well it works to play with strangers, especially when you just insta-bond with anonymous strangers and magically work as an expert team.

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Nick
22/3/2017 09:42:44 am

All shall have prizes! I jest, sorry.

I agree completely. I haven't really played any online games since the Xbox360 because I find the players a bit too weird and/or idiots (I realise I'm generalising terribly here, sorry). When I started Halo 3 online I would try to chat to the other people on the map and congratulate them when they scored a kill or narrowly avoided me killing them and it would drive them mad. Insults and demands to know why I wasn't upset at being owned were thrown at me, and so many references to my mothers life choices. I muted people but in the end just decided it wasn't my cup of tea.
I enjoyed Left 4 Dead in split screen with others in the room. On a large enough TV it was bloody brilliant and has been the closest I've come to replicating the multiplayer sessions of childhood.

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MrPSB
22/3/2017 09:49:46 am

Nintendo got me playing an online shooter after I'd been off them for about 10 years with Splatoon, so they can do both.

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Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 09:52:42 am

Because Nintendo, duh.

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Siegfied
22/3/2017 09:51:00 am

Almost exactly the same, although for some reason Battlefield 1 has really been my #1 played game since release. I took a punt on it for the game world, and I think I love it.

I'm not very good at it though, but at least you can be useful in it in ways that don't necessarily require you to the be best at aiming and shooting at randoms

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Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 09:52:16 am

Battlefront was like that for me - incredibly accessible, and didn't seem to over endow the "gud" players.

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Antony Adler
22/3/2017 09:53:53 am

Latest in a run of superb articles, Paul! You're really on a roll at the moment :)

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Carl Harrison
22/3/2017 09:58:47 am

I can see your point but I have to disagree in some areas. Playing against someone online is no different to beating a stranger at Street Fighter II at the local arcade back in the day. Except this time you aren't restricted to the local players. This time you can test yourself against people from around the world to see if you're really as good as you thought you were.Sure, you don't get to see them face to face but you can hear them (if they have a mic).

One thing that does annoy me is esports, especially the over the top American commentators desperately trying to make it sound more interesting than it is.

Also, just because the Switch comes with two controllers by default doesn't really prove anything, it's up to the developers to take advantage of that. Would you feel the same way if an Xbox One or PS4 came with two?

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Spiney O'Sullivan
22/3/2017 12:57:55 pm

I think that being face to face makes a huge difference, even with voice chat. The arcade at least promotes a certain "sportsmanship" that you don't often get with online interactions. Bad losers and winners are acknowledged as just that, rather than being pretty much the standard.

Also here is my impression of every esports commentator on a fighting game:

"And it's Ryu vs Ke-Oooohhh! OH! OOOOHHHH! WOAH! OH! Did you see that? ooooOOOOHHHHH! OH! YEEEAHHHHH!"

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Paul
22/3/2017 10:07:43 am

Yup - agree with this. I don’t really like online games, and while it’s being forced down our gullets, I’m still resisting. The two games I’ve played which are enforced online are Elite Dangerous and The Elder Scrolls Online.

Elite Dangerous is pretty much anarchy. Thankfully, there is a “solo” mode where you can play the game in a way that is as close to the original as possible, but you are still in the same universe as other players. Playing in a universe populated by others is madness - the whole “pwning n00bs” things is very pervasive, and off putting. I’d rather bimble along in solo mode or in a group where there are other players, but they aren’t supposed to attack real players.

The attitude of other players on a FaceBook group that I’m on is very telling. There is an attitude that you are somehow cheating, or certainly not doing it properly if you aren”t playing fully exposed to other players. The only conclusion I can get by from the ferociousness of people extolling those views is that they are somehow mentally unbalanced, and probably need help.

The elder Scrolls Online is another online game i have. You trundle around the world with other characters, who are also online. Thankfully not too many want to interact with others, but you get a few. I don’t have headphones and microphones connected, so if anyone tries to talk to me, it kind of seems rude that I’m not replying in kind. The big turnoff for me was one time I was playing, there was someone else who had a baby constantly crying in the background, and whenever that character was around, that’s what you could hear.

Suffice to say, neither of these games has been played much over the last 12 months.

The Switch does seem to be doing it right - let friends play together in a group. Far more fun, I feel.

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combat_honey
22/3/2017 10:08:03 am

A couple of years ago I would have said I felt the same way. But I find these days that more and more of my gaming time is taken up by online multiplayer, and that I enjoy it more than I ever thought I would.

My former reluctance to play competitive multiplayer games was mostly because I just didn't see the appeal in playing the same 'level' over and over again when I could play a proper single player game with a full campaign and story. But multiplayer games have progressed to the point that there's now loads of potential for variation in playing the same maps over and over again (the tactics that a single player chooses to use in Rainbow Six Siege, or the makeup of the teams on Overwatch, for example, can massively impact how a match plays out). Whereas, on the other hand, single player campaigns have largely become incredibly dull and formulaic.

On the social front, I agree that there's an argument that you might as well be playing against bots, and yes, online gaming communities can be toxic. But personally (and this is where I possibly reveal myself to be a bit of a saddo), I find something slightly comforting in being connected to other players when I'm playing games, and not *all* players are invested solely in the whole 'git gud' mentality.

Obviously, I'm not sure that online multiplayer will ever be as reliably fun as local multiplayer. But with most games and local multiplayer just isn't feasible.

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Daniel Howdle
22/3/2017 10:14:42 am

I don't disagree with this. It's your opinion, it's how you feel. I do, however, disagree with the underlying, somewhat unspoken premise on which it sits – that games have to be one thing to all folk. For example, no one thinks sports shouldn't be played by kids in a field on a Saturday afternoon because 'What's the point of them unless they're hoofing a – well, it might not even be a ball, quite frankly – between jumpers as a part of some professional league?'. Likewise there aren't a lot of folk out there who play football for fun, but don't like the professional game because it's all too serious and competitive.

Videogames can be all things, from artful entertainment (I was playing INSIDE last night and it was definitely that) to simulations of real-life experiences (driving, soldiering) you may never have the chance to have, to an excuse to shoot a mate in the face online or troll the hell out of randoms, to sitting alone and becoming enraptured by a game's world.

If we stop seeing games as this one homogeneous blob onto which we project our own ideals we can all just get on and enjoy what we enjoy. Because every type of experience is there.

D

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Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 10:43:03 am

Oh, absolutely. There's something for everyone in games - and yeah, anything I say is entirely slanted in favour of what I like. Obviously. I'm not here to offer an objective opinion.

What I object to, I guess, is the sneering elitism which often comes hand-in-hand with online gaming, and that all too often online shooters require less cutthroat players to be able to hold their own against more dedicated players. If that wasn't there, and there was more of a middle ground, I'm sure more of us would be open to the notion of playing online.

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Dan Howdle
22/3/2017 10:59:17 am

Yeah. Bit hard to avoid, that. Unless explicitly cooperative, online games are competitive by nature.People will want to improve at them because it's more fun when you're the wolf and not the sheep.

There's a few games I'm '1337' at online – Dark Souls, Battlefield series, but I've really put in the hours. And so I feel entitled. And that's half the problem.

Even though I know how horrible an experience it is to be twatted time and again by people who differentiate only insofar as the hours they put in (which may or not be a reflection of a wasted life) – I've HAVE put the damn hours in so they can suck on my artfully wielded longsword.

Nature of the beast. And I think the whole 'git gud' thing can be taken as advice as much as it can arrogant trolling. These games tend only to be great when you yourself are great at them. And that takes time. Single-player, and local multiplayer (as it tends to be spontaneous), do not require dedicated practice in quite the same way.

Nick
22/3/2017 11:30:40 am

I had to google 1337.
I don't want to seem rude and I agree with the point that not all games are for all people. On the smorgasbord of video games there should be something for every one.
But, I don't get it. All of this is the exact reason I avoid most online games. I would be the random getting trolled or the one sucking your magnificent long sword. It may well be the nature of the beast but it's not a beast I wish to play with, I just don't see where the fun starts for me or what in the world your getting out of it.

Dan Howdle
22/3/2017 11:36:54 am

I play first and foremost because I love the game. That's it. Not to troll, not to wield superiority over anyone. And I spend dozens upon dozens of hours getting killed. But I learn from each death and get better. And once you are good at it the game is better, simple.

I'm not motivated by wielding superiority over anyone, it's just like any other steadily improving experience, progress is satisfying. If you want to know exactly what I'm getting at, you need to be prepared to put in the hours. That's why you hear this childish 'git gud' all over the place. In that is couched:

1) I sucked at first too and it wasn't much fun
2) But getting steadily better was satisfying
3) And actually being good at it, the game itself is amazing
4) You shouldn't give up just because you perceive others are just 'naturally better' – it's not the case. They practice

'Git gud' is a shorthand for all of that. And it's the right advice.

Steve
22/3/2017 10:31:36 am

Completely agree. For online multiplayer to work for me, it needs to be enjoyable no matter how good you are. Rocket league is the only thing in recent years that has done this

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Mrtankthreat
22/3/2017 01:34:42 pm

The same could be said for local multiplayer. I don't enjoy local multiplayer because I'm usually way better than my friends. And I'm not even that good. I lose way more often online than I win (except maybe at fifa) but I'd rather a competitive game where I lose than constantly trouncing my mates. None of us end up having fun.

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Fancy Pants
22/3/2017 10:40:20 am

I put in a lot of hours on the first Modern Warfare on PS3. I really enjoyed it. That was about as "pure" a multiplayer FPS experience as could be had since Goldeneye. However, subsequent CoDs have diluted this experience by adding complicated garbage and players who clearly only ever play CoD, so are much much better than I.

Playing FIFA online is occasionally hilarious. Mario Kart 8 online is great as my son and I have no friends in real life who would've touched a Wii U. But yeah, you're more or less spot on.

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Kara Van Park
22/3/2017 10:54:54 am

I don't get on with online gaming because:

1) You're penalised for not playing something 8hrs a day
2) It feels like you're playing a game of count the dropped toothpicks with special folk that have Rain Man skills.
3) If I wanted to talk to the disembodied voices of dweebs I could get an evening job in a call centre and make some money out of it.

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Dan Whitehead
22/3/2017 10:59:35 am

Over Christmas I found myself playing the online modes of Watch Dogs 2 a lot. Not the co-op missions, but the Hacking game where you "invade" someone else's game and start hacking their data. They then have to find you (as you appear as an NPC to them) within a limited radius and against the clock. It's high tech hide and seek, basically. Ubisoft did something similar with Assassin's Creed, but the technology aspect of Watch Dogs really makes it work - using drones, hacking vehicles to create distractions etc. What I love about it is that you don't win by attacking the other player, but by fooling them. It's about play-acting as an NPC, a form of immediate "role playing" that flips the term on its head. My favourite online gaming moments have come from that mode, sitting in a car right next to some hapless player who is dashing around looking for me, unaware I'm sitting in plain sight.

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Stoo
22/3/2017 11:01:58 am

I've never had any interest in online gaming, apart from Warcraft, and I originally signed up for that just to play with friends.

I can see the appeal, some of those big shooters like battlefield look like a lot of fun. But, the prospect of getting killed over and over and over by people a lot more skilled than myself is off-putting. I don't have the time or inclination to practise until I can match the experts.

I also feel that if I'm going to get validation in my life from being good at an activity, it should probably be something with more tangible real-life results.

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Rich
22/3/2017 11:13:37 am

Agree entirely.

I avoided online multiplay right up until last year, when me and a friend bought The Division. It took over our gaming lives for a long time, (we still revisit). The hook wasn't just the game, good as it is, it was the social aspect.

We also met a few other regular players that we still keep in touch with, and 3 of us are not playing through Ghost Recon: Wildlands.

We aren't great, but we have a good laugh. The best times we have seem to be when we're playing at our worst.

We play a few hours a night 2 or 3 days a week.

This also lead to my workmate coming to mine to play Gears of Way 1 - 4 split screen co-op. (he isn't a multi format owner like me).

Can't think of anything worse than solely playing against strangers without the social element.

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Andee
22/3/2017 11:21:48 am

I haven't played a FPS online since my introductory Eggbox360 gold month expired and I stopped having to pretend I was enjoying Halo.

I love GTAV5 Online - after completeing the standalone game I got introduced to online via a non game related web forum. I got shown around a "normal" person who was a frequent poster and learnt what was fun and how to avoid sweary kids and racists in public sessions.

We met other players who weren't idiots and we formed a "crew".
Now I'd say more than half my limited gaming time is spent in GTAV online. We rarely play death match stuff or get involved in the freemode running battles. Mainly we're co-operating against NPC in missions or racing each other or just arsing about in vehicles.
As you can set private party chat on the PS4 and private sessions to play in your exposure to the more obnoxious elements of the online "community" are limited.
If you don't know one of us you aren't even visible.

It's basically like chatting with pals and playing out on bikes when you were a kid. It's just the "kids" are spread out over the UK and other random bits of the world.

Local multiplayer works really well when I'm playing Little Big Planet or Lego games with my kid but if there were no online modes in more adult games I'd never get to play with anyone but cut scene characters.

Co-operative and competitive multiplayer is fun if you're playing with the right people. I don't care if its local or worldwide.

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Alastair
22/3/2017 11:50:16 am

Halo multiplayer was good fun for me when a mate in the same room and I went online, but I've never been too bothered to be honest.

So it's annoying to find a lot of xbox achievements now include online elements too.

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pretentious, critical Biscuits
22/3/2017 12:23:18 pm

*pushes glasses up nose*

Dear me, another fogeyish + click-baity article from the Biffmeister - and again, immediately negated by your gaming 'blind spots': How about games like Dark Souls, and Journey, which make fantastic use of online play, and wouldn't work in local multiplayer at all? Indeed, for these titles at least, the inclusion of a headset would break everything the games aim for: the excitement is in not knowing who you are playing with, and forming a connection based on gesturing and action.

If the idea of playing games is a dynamic experience in a strange fantastic world, do I really need to hear Sid from Ipswich discussing the latest in his interminable saga of mundane office drudgery? Do people with sinus problems eating crisps into a microphone add to immersion?

The article seems to focus on the competitive side of online multiplayer. Hey Briggs: the competitive side of anything is filled with insufferable 'git gud' try-hards.

This brings me to my main issue with the article: if we follow this logic, it seems as though there's no point in playing games unless you are the best, or in training to be the best. People like playing games because playing games is fun. Not everyone is out to 'git gud', and, crucially, not everyone is annoyed when someone 'gudder' than them beats them...feeling irritated at such a result suggests an inherently competitive mindset imo: both impulses seemingly stem from the same place. I personally play for fun, see: i'm never going to be the best, so it makes sense people will kill me a lot, and that's just tinky (fine).

That you can't see the readily-apparent and seemingly endless potential in such a massive and far-reaching development makes me wonder if indeed this is how you feel, or if you are kicking against an inevitability you don't agree with?

Most of your issue would be solved, I think, if you throw the headset onto a big fire, and embrace anonymity

*pushes glasses up arse*

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Biscuits the dullard
22/3/2017 01:10:51 pm

I wish I had googled 'tinky' before I used it, it not only already exists but has a video games-related definition

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Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 02:58:51 pm

I always eschew the headset. Given that I don't play against mates these dates, I hate playing with the headset more than I do without it. It has nothing to do with that.

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Biscuits
22/3/2017 05:00:43 pm

I guess what I was trying to get across is, one thing online play allows for is playing with multiple people, while still offering the immersion of single player games. With in-the-room multiplayer, in-the-room is very much where my mind resides. It's great fun with friends and a few drinks and Mario Kart or something, but it's a light, fluffy experience. Given that I've also never been the competitive sort, roaming around Lordran or San Andreas with friends is great! It's less 'game' and more 'adventure' - no, really!

Plus, and this is where I stretch the definition of 'friend', but I've met people I've played with again and again, over various games. Over various consoles even. Over the years, we've become sort-of close. One of them went online and sent me a pizza for my birthday, from the other side of the world. We live in truly exciting times

Mrtankthreat
22/3/2017 12:51:58 pm

Disappointed with the click-baity title. I also think there's too much of a focus on online shooters which is where I primarily come across the negative "git gud" mentality. (See Dan's post above for the positive angle which does exist. It can be genuine advice not a dismissive taunt)

Most other online experiences I really enjoy. Fifa's online seasons is great because it makes a decent effort to match you up ability wise. There's no real perks to unlock that actually counter intuitively reward the better players.

As an example I love assassin's creed multiplayer but I still just play 3 because I didn't want to have to struggle through black flag and unlock all the equipment again. Why can't I have smoke bombs from the start?

And I know you're probably sick of it but once again Dark Souls gets it pretty much right as well with not only both competitive and cooperative multiplayer but also with the messaging system and even the wider online community around the game such as the wiki and the online lore videos.

Then you have stuff like Journey and the aforementioned rocket league. I wouldn't class either of those experiences as sad and tragic.

As for the Switch, the console may be designed with local multiplayer in mind but so far, for me anyway, doesn't have the games to support it yet. Overpriced bomberman and the dreadful (again for me) 1-2 switch? No thanks.

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Mrtankthreat
22/3/2017 01:08:36 pm

Blast. While I was writing all that out pretentious, critical Buscuits got there before me saying it pretty much better than I could. If competitive online comment writing were a thing I'd have to "git gud". (As soon as I post there's going to already be a better post than this saying the same thing isn't there?)

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Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 03:00:41 pm

You boys really need to get over the whole click-baity titles thing. This is a website. That's like criticising a pop song for having a catchy chorus.

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Nick Bate
22/3/2017 03:54:49 pm

Fine fine, but misleading incendiary headlines get misleading incendiary responses (and lead to a lot of the laziness/misdirection that gave us a couple of potentially catastrophic vote results last year)

Mrtankthreat
22/3/2017 04:06:11 pm

There's nothing wrong with criticising a song for being catchy. There are bad songs that I hate for the fact they are catchy. Catchy doesn't automatically mean good.

Voodoo76
22/3/2017 04:56:57 pm

They obviously don't get your way of thinking Biffo. To those of us who have followed you for years we know you're not the type to resort to click bait headlines. We're here to read your brilliant pieces, irrelevant of which headline you choose. Please don't reply to his response on catchy songs, you'll never win!

Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 05:00:15 pm

Mr Tankthreat has misunderstood my point. Also: ta, Voodoo.

Nick
22/3/2017 05:16:40 pm

I agree with Nick. You caused Brexit. Booooo, and indeed Hiissss!

Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 05:30:30 pm

I'm history's greatest monster!

French Fancys
22/3/2017 06:22:02 pm

Yeah we know you are not the type to resort to clickbait headlines, except you have already acknowledged you did. Do what you must, but please be responsible! As noted above, they can be very dangerous.

It's strange that Nick would take it to mean YOU caused Brexit when the post was clearly referring to clickbait-y headlines, such a reach would suggest his view is not fully formed.

We will always read your stuff, insulting headlines or not. But as also noted above, do be prepared for this kind of 'disagreement' to emerge in the comments, and then the comments section to eventually turn to poisoned gruel. It's merely responding in kind after all

Mrtankthreat
22/3/2017 06:56:26 pm

Indeed. I agree with Voodoo, Biffo doesn't usually resort to click-baity headlines which is why this one surprised me. For what it's worth I love the site. I would have read the article no matter what the headline and I want Biffo to get as many clicks and views as possible but there was a tone to this one which seemed like it wasn't Biffo's usual style and is a style I would hope he wouldn't continue to go down just to get clicks.

And sure a click-baity title which gets clicks has done it's job in the same way a song with a catchy chorus that gets stuck in your head has done it's job but both are still open to criticism.

Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 06:58:58 pm

Does it really matter?! It's just some stuff about video games, loves.

source: my dad is German
22/3/2017 07:19:38 pm

THAT WAS LITERALLY WHAT THE GERMANS SAID ABOUT HITLER

Nick
22/3/2017 09:04:00 pm

That is exactly how I took it. Do you see?

peter cushion
22/3/2017 12:52:46 pm

I would agree that online competitive multiplayer against strangers is rubbish, but I do enjoy co-op online with my best pals against computer AI. As fully-fledged grown-ups, there’s no way we could all get together once a week and sit around in each other houses all plugged in to one machine - we live all over the country, some even live in Durham. Factor in all the other family and work commitments and it’s one of the easiest ways to stay in touch with friends.

Thursday night has always been our ‘darts and doms of the computer world’ night - Gears of War horde mode is absolutely terrific as are the Rainbow Six games. Terrorist Hunt against the computer AI can literally be played forever. I would argue the most perfect game made is Rainbow Six Vegas on the 360. The entire campaign can be played solo with decent AI by your side, or with a bunch of mates online taking their place. Or with mates split-screen. Then the online competitive multiplayer if you want that, or co-operative Terrorist Hunt against the AI, or lone-wolf Terrorist Hunt against the AI, offline. I don’t think there was any levelling up or micro-transactions or any of that stuff either.

There’s a brilliant example of online co-op which is Divinity Origins Enhanced edition (on sale on xbox one store at the moment). The whole campaign - which is MASSIVE - can be played co-operatively with the players able to wander independently across the entire world casting magic spells with magical amulets and the like. 100s of hours of gameplay which no grown up could have the time to complete or co-ordinate, but it’s there all the same. And the turn-based combat is superb.

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Biscuits
22/3/2017 01:05:34 pm

Yes! Divinity:OS online was a revelation

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Picston Shottle
22/3/2017 01:19:14 pm

I'm sure there's a direct correlation between how "gud" you are and vaginas, or lack of vaginas, specifically, both in access to (yes, sounds crude, but you know where I'm coming from) and absence of; I've never come across a "gud" girl calling me a fag, nigger, bitch, cock farmer (I'll own to loving this one - it's inspired), or any other such witty epithet.

Online gaming is a world of twats.

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Dan Howdle
22/3/2017 01:23:15 pm

Well, you're conflating idiot, racist, homophobic, juvenile, bigoted teenage boys with normal players who plough their gaming time into one or two games and hence become rather good at them. It's a stereotype, and sure, people like that exist, but I rarely cross paths with them myself. Pretty offensive to lump everyone in like that.

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Mr John
22/3/2017 01:40:52 pm

Great article. Sadly, the internet and online connectivity has shone a light on the general public, and it turns out a large part of the general public are barely functioning sociopathic wankers.

Keep up the good work!

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A kid called Dave
22/3/2017 01:48:04 pm

I used to roll with my cousin in Red Dead Redemption, he a miner covered in dirt, me a member of the Sioux not bothering with posses, cos we hated posses, doing our own thing.
Or that time in WoW when my cousin was granted privileges in a guild before stealing everything and booting out all members, leaving the guild master destitute. I still remember the bounding over hills cackling like madmen over teamspeak. Pretty rotten but the guild master had it coming.
Or when we were atop Iwo Jima trying our best to stop the rampant American invasion. Banzai-ing our way out of trouble.

And then time did its thing and the cousin now has more important things to do, but I went ahead and tried The Elder Scrolls Online and the whole thing fell flat since the good times, though good, were kind of empty without a kindred soul to share it with.

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David link
22/3/2017 01:51:12 pm

This is a great article which I broadly agree with. I'd never really gotten on with online multiplayer because, being mostly crap, I never really saw the point of getting humiliated by a bunch of strangers on the internet. Having said that, there were a few games I loved playing online - Quake III and the various Halos - but in those I felt anonymous, and I guess that gets back to the "might as well be playing bots" scenario. For instance, I don't want to talk to people or discuss strategies, I just want to shoot pink lasers at people.

One thing I will say, though, is that I do think there is a bit of a difference between bots and people. I think there is a bit on chaos with actual humans, and a sense of achievement that you're matching wits with guys and gals. But it's not really enough to keep me engaged for a long time, although it is a fun diversion.

When I first got my 360, I totally embraced Xbox Live, and would try to participate with my headset on and all that, but I ended up playing Perfect Dark Zero with a 12-year-old Texan boy who, upon finding out I was British, proceeded to tell me how much he hated the Queen but loved Bush. Nice kid.

Really though, the big thing that stops me playing online is time and kids. I usually game after 10pm with the wife and kids in bed, and should one of the nippers cry out I like to be able to pause the game and see to them if necessary. Which is a shame, because the little I played of Titanfall I really enjoyed.

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Roy Scheider
22/3/2017 02:15:22 pm

I much prefer defeating computer opponents than human ones, the war against the machines. It feels like revenge on my shitty toaster or that touch lamp that stopped working for no reason

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Panama Joe
22/3/2017 02:44:01 pm

+1 in most respects.
The most enjoyment I get out of online multiplayer games is from dicking around. GTA V, Burnout Paradise, Minecraft, and Euro Truck Simulator were good examples of being able to kick back and dick around aimlessly while having the opportunity to socialise with other people. It's a lot easier to make friends online and join communities in that style of game, more so than in the brief encounters of ultra-competitive matches that most online play involves.

I'm not averse to some quick bouts of Rocket League or War Thunder to get a hit from playing well and getting a decent score, but my interest tends to wane once I reach a plateau in skill level, or if I buy the game 6 months after it came out and I am hopelessly outgunned and never get the benefit of learning the ropes alongside other noobs. I think the Battlefield games look and play excellent and are exactly the kind of thing that I *should* love to play online, but that there is such a huge difference in skill and unlockables and the thoughts of having to grind out countless hours to catch up, is a major turn-off.

So I disagree that multiplayer gaming can only be fun if it is local. I think online can be fun if the style of game encourages socialising.

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Jabberwoc
22/3/2017 03:25:05 pm

I'm cack at "Call of Duty:Ghosts" but when I miraculously kill an elite player (usually an American aged about 11) it really winds them up.
So you can still get pleasure by being awful.

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Omniro
22/3/2017 03:30:43 pm

Online gaming environments have always been toxic, pretty much right from the start. I'm sure that partly has something to do with the age-bracket of many of the players... but in general, those elements are easily ignored, and they are just the vocal minority. In most online games I play, everyone is silent. The few times I hear someone talking on a mic, I immediately mute them, even if they're not being insulting, because it's usually just a distorted noise.
I disagree that you might as well be playing against a computer if you're not playing with friends. There is a world of difference between playing against the computer and humans, it is far more challenging. You can even see it in the way characters on the screen move, there's something immediately distinct about a human controlled character, and there is satisfaction in becoming skilled enough to be good.
Criticising online gaming for having "no useful real-world application" is a bit of an odd sentiment for a gamer. Can't we say the same about all single player games?

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Rawce
22/3/2017 05:11:43 pm

Hmmm, not sure I agree on some of this. I'm currently on the Destiny grind, playing Siva strikes to up my light level to catch up with my mates. Why? So we can get drunk on a Friday night and complete raids as a group. It's sad sack social without the germs and it's great fun. We're playing less and less CoD as we age and find our reactions are less up to snuff, so instead stick to the likes of the Division (and avoid the DarkZone where not being topped out on gear or a proper douche really hurts). It's shooty shooty bang bang but all for the social side which is split between random chat, obviously hilarious in-jokes and actual game strategy/blame storming. We've picked up Ghost Recon Wildlands recently. I know I’m not going to enjoy the clunky story (I’ve already decided it’ll be like HZD sounds but with worse cut scenes and ‘acting’), so I’m only going to play it because I get to be part of a team. The big set pieces are worth it for me, even though we get quite ginned up. It’ll mean I have to grind the single player a bit to at least get better weapons and skills, but Fridays (and sometimes Wednesdays or Sundays) are worth it.

Plus the sneering elitism - how is this known? Do you get messages after the game from said spotted youth denouncing your skills? Even more frightening, are you using in-game chat with them and they are bellowing their superiority at you? For me, it's an assumption that they are sneering, mostly because I've got a grump on because they've just handed me my backside on a plate. And the fact I’d probably be sneering anonymously if I won.

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Mr Biffo
22/3/2017 06:57:48 pm

Well... you don't have to agree with it! Just means we like/want different things!

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Chris Wyatt
22/3/2017 09:48:04 pm

I mostly disagree, but I see where you're coming from.

Mario Kart Wii: I enjoy playing it online, but you kind of might as well be playing against CPUs. You are bound down by the rules of the game, and the actual interaction (i.e. hitting each other with weapons) often doesn't require much skill. There is usually some ridiculously good player at the front who maintains that position, and then carnage further on back, where the position you get is largely down to luck, as you drop forwards and backwards and forwards and backwards through the ranks. I'm not saying it's not fun, but you can mimic different playing styles using AI and still get relatively the same experience. I guess, also, the more players you have, the more saturated and impersonal it becomes.

Tetris and Puyo Puyo: I recently mentioned that I'm looking forward to Puyo Puyo Tetris, and playing one-on-one with another player is really fun. You can pick up strategies from the other players, and because you are (presumably) playing against another person, you feel more competitive, and feel more smug when you absolutely destroy them, but I guess this is largely down to personality so I can see why someone else wouldn't get the same buzz from it. Maybe I'm a narcissist?

But my Tetris skills definitely improved while playing against insanely good (mainly Japanese) people online, and I learnt some tips that I might have not figured out. Though I guess once you learn the strategies, it kind of becomes boring, and you move on.

I do find people who play online games constantly very weird indeed. I've lived with housemates who spent hours playing first person shooters online; surely it gets boring after a couple of hours and you do something else? I had to live next to someone in a box room who played CoD every night till the early hours, and had to listen to constant explosion noises while I was trying to get to sleep. Drove me fucking mad.

Come to think of it, everyone I lived with who played FPS games for unhealthy lengths of time turned out to be selfish cunts:
- Housemate 1 - abused our shared bank account which was used for paying bills and decided to buy takeaways and have nights out on it. I never got all the money back and had court case threats sent to me, because my name was on all the accounts. He also screwed up my credit rating. It was partly my fault for using a system of trust. Never again!
- Housemate 2 - Played crappy FPS games till the early hours of the morning, with subwoofers vibrating the thin wall between us.
- Housemate 3 - Had parties in his box room next to me without giving me any warning he was going to have guests. Always talking loudly on his phone, and when he wasn't doing that, playing noisy FPS games and shouting through his headset. All his hobbies involved making a tremendous amount of noise, not to mention, it wasn't even a wall between us, but a partition; fucking nightmare. Also, he kept screwing up our internet, because he'd plug in his Homeplug adaptor right next to mine, attached to the same router, essentially DoS attacking our own LAN. Basically, this creates 2 network bridges in parallel to each other, causing a feedback loop! So all the TCP packets would continue being replicated (by power of 2) until they completely flooded the network, forcing the router to crash and have to restart itself. He was so arrogant, that he refused to believe me, even though I work in IT. I don't expect everyone to be an IT expert (and don't consider myself one), but surely having 2 Homeplugs right next to each other would ring alarm bells? Just read the bloody quick start guide! You have to press just 2 buttons to join the network! Couldn't be easier!

END RANT

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Bryan link
23/3/2017 07:05:48 am

I think what this boils down to is the sociology behind it: the people that play the game(s) make it what it is. When you combine that with the amount of pleasure you get individually from the game mechanics that's the formula for enjoying online games.

Tastes change over months as weeks as you change yourself. I loved Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare online and became better at MW2 because of the hours put in. But by MW3 I was bored and found it quite an empty experience. So I tried Battlefield: Bad Company 2 and adored it. The slower pace felt more strategic and it was easier for me to rack up kills. Plus the mix of vehicles made the warfare feel more like a large scale conflict.

Elsewhere I stick to racing only on GTA V and I know I'd find the shooting irritating and annoying. Likewise I 100%ed Assassin's Creed but never played the multiplayer in later instalments because I primarily played AC for the exploration and parkour, not the competitive assassinations.

You just have to "find the fun" at your own level of skill - that may be via "git gud" or with a group of real-life mates bantering with headsets.

Awesome article by the way and don't worry about click-bait headlines. Love a good clickbait headline!

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DEAN
23/3/2017 09:29:12 am

Gee whiz!

You know something's gone scuttling into lewd passion when Hitler rears his vile wee punum!

A friend and I used to love playing Halo cooperatively. We were dead excited when Doom 3 came out and really let down when the co-op mode was online only. We played through it and had some fun but... it was 2nd best. Not the game, loved the game, just the experience.

I had another friend that met his girlfriend playing WOW. I thought that was pretty cool and modernly romantic so... yeah, I'm sure it works out great for a lot of people.

The only online game I've played in recent memory is Journey and that's because of not having to pay for the privilege of playing online.
It was a very cool experience but there's no way I'd be subscribing to Playstation + to ascend the paywall.

Not really for me but seems to make a lot of people very happy. Sorry that wasn't meant for here - that was meant for another comments section about the colour of Leo Messi's hair.

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Nikki
23/3/2017 10:07:07 am

I play online when the game's AI gets predictable and boring. Human players are totally different to play against.

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NDrinks
23/3/2017 05:29:27 pm

I dread to think what would have happened to Resident Evil 7 if the developers had been forced to shoehorn in multiplayer. Playing Rock Band with my mates in the same room before the pub every weekend will always be one of my best memories since it happened right before we all had to go and be proper adults. I think of setting it all up again and arranging a weekend but I don't think it would be quite the same. One of my friends is only in the country once a year but we always make sure we have a night of Street Fighter 3 before he leaves again. He still throws the controller across the room when he loses so we haven't really changed that much I suppose.

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ChorltonWheelie
23/3/2017 09:32:45 pm

Ah, we are old people Biffo.

Sonbuns seems to be having a lovely time with his CS-Go chums. All I ever hear is hoots of wild laughter or whispered low, cunning plans from his den.
I, on the other hand, like a game with a beginning middle and end. Not at all interested in competition.

The problem comes when we conflate these simple differences in taste with actual distaste and rancour with other people.
The world is full of fucked up people from top to bottom. That they appear in competitive online games is as inevitable as them appearing in politics, workplaces and around your house hogging the Switch controller and farting.

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Col. Asdasd
24/3/2017 09:01:38 am

Fascinating read Mr B. It reminded me of an article I thought you might be interested in:

http://www.shamusyoung.com/twentysidedtale/?p=19709

It's about online commenting rather than online gaming, but I think there's plenty of overlap between the two.

Comparing your perspective with Seamus's's's, I find it's his experience that matches up with my many wasted hours playing a competitive Dota 2. The majority of people I encounter tend not to be shitty by default. If you're polite and cooperative most players will respond in kind. But all it ever takes is one arsehole saying arseholey things and the flood gates to the river Berk are flung wide.

I reckon this is a general malaise, rather than a problem exclusive to online gaming. Just look at Twitter for an example of an online activity in which people of all stripes can be sneering, rude and exclusionary. Or the Washington Square Park chess scene for a gaming space of the face-to-face, local multiplayer variety that's anything other than well behaved.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b04h8792

Lastly, I'm not sure what the jab about acne did for your case besides make you look a bit sneery yersen. Millions are affected by acne. It's a miserable affliction that has no correlation with personality type. If you really want to detoxify the culture surrounding gaming, as this article seems to suggest, casually slinging these kind of physiognomic slurs around won't help.

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Voodoo76
24/3/2017 12:46:19 pm

All the comments from the angry people who play online make me not want to play online all the more now.

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Chris Wyatt
24/3/2017 01:47:54 pm

Grrrrr

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Matt
28/3/2017 05:55:25 pm

Can't stand on-line gaming.
Not even bothered about playing with mates.
I just want a well thought out and immersive single player.
I like to discover at my own pace, doing my own thing.
With the wife well and the job well out of the picture for a few hours.
Give me Metroid Prime, Uncharted, The Last of Us and even Everybody's gone to the Rapture over any dedicated on-line stuff.
Just don't see the appeal.

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Roy (Stuart N Hardy fan)
1/4/2017 12:25:30 am

Once again I find myself agreeing with Mr B.
I tried online gaming a coupla three times and didn't care much for it.
Far too many mouthy children for my liking and when you tell them this they never seem to take it very well.

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