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DIARY: SEAN MURRAY - thE REASON I CAN'T ENJOY THE SUCCESS OF NO MAN'S SKY IS BECAUSE OF DRACULA

6/9/2016

12 Comments

 
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"As I write this, we are nearly a month since the release of No Man's Sky, the game I dedicated the past four years to creating, and the previous decades of my life imagineering in my subconscious mind. I can't take all the credit, of course. It was a team effort. Everyone here at Hello Games really gave it their all. I can't thank them enough.

"It has been an interesting four weeks or so, and I have spent much of it attempting to reclaim my life, to regain some sort of equilibrium, after spending so long dedicating myself to one goal: providing you all with the greatest procedurally-generated space game we were capable of.

"​Unfortunately, my attempts at relaxing have been hampered by the actions of one individual: Count Dracula, the famous vampire."
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"On the first day after the release of No Man's Sky, I did something I'd been wanting to do for a very long time: visit Wetworld, my local indoor water park.

"As I was putting my clothes in the locker, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around and there he was: Dracula. I recognised him immediately from the horror movies I watched as a teenager.

"'That's my locker' he said, despite there being dozens of other available lockers. 

'Don't be silly,' I replied, 'Use one of the other lockers'.

"Dracula gave me a look of pure disdain, clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth, turned into a bat, and flew off to another part of the changing room.

"Thinking nothing more of it, I closed my locker and got into the pool. I was moving around in the water, having fun as it lapped against my torso, when I saw him on the other side of the slides.

"He was standing in the shallow end, in trunks and cape, just staring at me. I tried to ignore him, but later - on the lazy river - he started splashing me. When I told him to stop, he swore at me in Romanian, turned into a bat, and flew off.

"A week passed, and I thought nothing more of the incidents at the water park. I was buying some chips on my way home, when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around and there he was again: Dracula. 

"'Remember me?' he asked, as the chip shop owner handed me my order. 'At Wetworld last week. You stole my locker.'

"'I didn't steal it,' I sighed. 'There were loads of other available lockers, which you - '

"'No hard feelings,' he interrupted, before I could finish my sentence. He extended a hand, in what I assumed was a gesture of conciliation, but when I tentatively offered my own, he reached into his cape, pulled out a bag of flour, and threw it hard at my chest.

​"The bag burst upon impact. I was enveloped in a white cloud, the flour going all over my chips and everywhere. By the time I'd gathered my wits about me, Dracula had gone.

"That was the last time I saw him, but in recent weeks I've logged an increase in the number of negative comments online, regarding No Man's Sky, many of which are written by users calling themselves things like 'Bracula', and 'The Count', and 'D.Racula', and 'SeanIsaLockerThief'.

"Additionally, our office inbox has been getting some weird spam over the last week, newsletters for things I've never signed up for, like garden centres, and places like that. I have no concrete proof, but I just know it's Dracula, messing with me.

"It's a shame, because it has really soured what was a successful launch for our game, the culmination of so much hard work. To think that something so good can all be ruined by one person behaving like an idiot."
FROM THE ARCHIVE:
THE ART THAT INSPIRED NO-MAN'S SKY
​
THE XBOX ONE OWNER'S GUIDE TO NO MAN'S SKY - AS ILLUSTRATED WITH GUY FIERI
​
IT'S NOT FOR US TO TELL YOU WHAT TO DO WITH THESE PHOTOS OF VINTAGE GAMERS... BUT PERHAPS YOU'D LIKE TO SHOW THEM TO YOUR DAD IN THE BATH?
12 Comments
Trevor Cod
6/9/2016 12:08:53 pm

Did Draclia steal his shoes and socks while he was getting changed in the pool?

Reply
Spiney O'Sullivan
6/9/2016 12:51:30 pm

Paranormal threats to developers are becoming a serious problem. Capcom are keeping it hush-hush, but the reason that Street Fighter V lacked content is largely because three werewolves and a mummy took up residence in their office and barricaded the door so the team couldn't put in a VS CPU or Arcade mode due to a several-month-long monster mash (which, rumour has it, was a graveyard smash). They eventually got them out, but there's fur and bits of bandage all over the place.

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Nocturne
6/9/2016 12:54:02 pm

He doesn't wear socks or shoes, it may have been in one photograph but he definately doesn't wear them ever, and that's because he's some sort of ghoul or possibly a goblin. He's going to have to accept that Dracula is his superior and should have moved lockers when given the chance. Shame on him. No Man's Sky? No Man's Locker more like!!!

Reply
David W
6/9/2016 09:51:02 pm

Visitors start with a single locker. The second one costs 20p and they get more expensive after that. Clothing does not stack, hence the omission of socks and shoes.

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MrPSB
6/9/2016 01:44:02 pm

Leave Sean alone he's a dreamboat and I want to have a warm hairy cuddle with him xoxo

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Rakladtor IV
6/9/2016 07:55:51 pm

I'd like to see a ROM Hack for Castlevania, where you control Sean Murray in his battle against the evil hordes of Dracula

Reply
TheCount
6/9/2016 08:32:43 pm

I could drink Murray's blood under the table, ah, ah, ahhhhhhh...

Reply
Rakladtor IV
6/9/2016 08:36:43 pm

Yeah but why would you? What's wrong with tables?

Reply
TheCount
6/9/2016 08:43:37 pm

Thank you for confirming your subscription to Dobbie's Gardening World newsletter; for all your bedding plant needs and more! SPECIAL OFFER: 25% off all grow bags using code GROW2016 at checkout.

Mean Surrey
6/9/2016 10:08:55 pm

I may have added another planet in the latest patch. Somebody needs to go away and check how many there are again, "Count."

Rakladtor IV
6/9/2016 09:58:33 pm

The real Count would never reply with random c+p guff. Dracula is sophisticated, intelligent, and utilizes tables correctly. Watch Bram Stoker's Dracula and get your shit together.

Reply
TheCount
7/9/2016 10:23:46 pm

I cuss you bad.

Reply



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