"Hi. I'm Mark Zuckerberg, the Facebook guy. As you might know, my company is investing heavily in virtual reality technology.
"We acquired the Oculus Rift VR system because I saw its potential in so many different areas; not only gaming, but medicine, engineering, and a new way of interacting with one another socially.
"VR, I firmly believe, will change the world - and in the decades to come will be the dominant technology pulling us forwards as a species.
"However, for me there's one application of the medium that I just can't wait to implement: using it to watch old episodes of Only Fools And Horses."
"We acquired the Oculus Rift VR system because I saw its potential in so many different areas; not only gaming, but medicine, engineering, and a new way of interacting with one another socially.
"VR, I firmly believe, will change the world - and in the decades to come will be the dominant technology pulling us forwards as a species.
"However, for me there's one application of the medium that I just can't wait to implement: using it to watch old episodes of Only Fools And Horses."
IMAGINE THE IMPOSSIBLE
"Imagine it: you're sat in your living room, and in front of you is a VCR and a stack of VHS tapes. You get up from your sofa, pick up a tape, slide it into the machine, and your TV screen blossoms into life.
"Appearing on that screen in front of your eyes is the very first episode of the classic BBC sitcom Only Fools And Horses. Incredible.
"This isn't some crazed pipe dream: I truly believe that it's only a matter of time before this scenario becomes possible through the power of virtual reality. The living room, the VCR, your sofa - even the VHS tapes - they wouldn't exist physically, but in the digital space created between VR processing and your mind.
"Oculus Rift can bring all those early episodes back to life, and you'll be able to watch them as if you're really watching them. That stack of virtual VHS tapes could contain the entire series - all the times Trigger called Rodney 'Dave', or when he talked about his broom. You could see Boycie and Marlene doing their stuff, and that one with the illegal immigrant who stowed away in the Trotters' van.
"You could even relive the moment when Del Boy fell through the bar - as many times as you wanted. Just hit rewind on your virtual video player remote, and watch it over and over. The collection could even contain the later, less good, Christmas specials. Honestly, the sky is the limit here. It would be so real you'd even be able to adjust the tracking on the VCR if the picture got a bit fuzzy.
"You probably need a moment or two to take all this in, and that's fine. It's only normal. When I first had this idea in my sleep, I was so blown away that I urinated in my bed, and started screaming, stamping and clapping. My wife was terrified.
"As I told her, once we'd both calmed down: a future of unlimited virtual Only Fools And Horses is just a heartbeat away."
"Imagine it: you're sat in your living room, and in front of you is a VCR and a stack of VHS tapes. You get up from your sofa, pick up a tape, slide it into the machine, and your TV screen blossoms into life.
"Appearing on that screen in front of your eyes is the very first episode of the classic BBC sitcom Only Fools And Horses. Incredible.
"This isn't some crazed pipe dream: I truly believe that it's only a matter of time before this scenario becomes possible through the power of virtual reality. The living room, the VCR, your sofa - even the VHS tapes - they wouldn't exist physically, but in the digital space created between VR processing and your mind.
"Oculus Rift can bring all those early episodes back to life, and you'll be able to watch them as if you're really watching them. That stack of virtual VHS tapes could contain the entire series - all the times Trigger called Rodney 'Dave', or when he talked about his broom. You could see Boycie and Marlene doing their stuff, and that one with the illegal immigrant who stowed away in the Trotters' van.
"You could even relive the moment when Del Boy fell through the bar - as many times as you wanted. Just hit rewind on your virtual video player remote, and watch it over and over. The collection could even contain the later, less good, Christmas specials. Honestly, the sky is the limit here. It would be so real you'd even be able to adjust the tracking on the VCR if the picture got a bit fuzzy.
"You probably need a moment or two to take all this in, and that's fine. It's only normal. When I first had this idea in my sleep, I was so blown away that I urinated in my bed, and started screaming, stamping and clapping. My wife was terrified.
"As I told her, once we'd both calmed down: a future of unlimited virtual Only Fools And Horses is just a heartbeat away."
SLIP ON A RIFT
"Only Fools And Horses might not be your favourite show, but the versatility of VR means that we could be talking about almost any classic TV sitcom.
"Slip on an Oculus Rift headset, and you could watch old episodes of As Time Goes By, Bread, or To The Manor Born.
"You could, potentially, be the owner of entire series of these shows, with your virtual VHS collection taking up absolutely no space in your house - because the VHS tapes wouldn't really exist, in any physical sense.
"My mission with Oculus VR is to enable you to experience the impossible, and what could be more impossible than owning a complete collection of The Brittas Empire, without the tapes even physically existing in your home?
"Already, we're getting close to accurately simulating a top-of-the-line VCR. It's only a question of somehow making that function accurately within a virtual living room. My engineers are working around the clock to make this a reality for you.
"Thanks for reading. BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!"
"Only Fools And Horses might not be your favourite show, but the versatility of VR means that we could be talking about almost any classic TV sitcom.
"Slip on an Oculus Rift headset, and you could watch old episodes of As Time Goes By, Bread, or To The Manor Born.
"You could, potentially, be the owner of entire series of these shows, with your virtual VHS collection taking up absolutely no space in your house - because the VHS tapes wouldn't really exist, in any physical sense.
"My mission with Oculus VR is to enable you to experience the impossible, and what could be more impossible than owning a complete collection of The Brittas Empire, without the tapes even physically existing in your home?
"Already, we're getting close to accurately simulating a top-of-the-line VCR. It's only a question of somehow making that function accurately within a virtual living room. My engineers are working around the clock to make this a reality for you.
"Thanks for reading. BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!"
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