"Goodness. It has been a while since we two last crossed paths. What an absolute delight it is to bump against you once again, here at another of the ambassador's legendary soirees. Allow me to bring you up to speed with recent developments.
"I have of late been bolstering my collection of magazines with back issues of Dragon User. You remember the Dragon 32 don't you? It was the proverbial also-ran in the 1980s personal computer stakes.
"Come, take my hand, and let us peruse my back issues together. I promise I shan't issue upon your back (unless that's what you're into)..."
"Say now, after we've eaten, why don't we compare printers? You wouldn't believe how quickly mine can spew out a ream of white."
"Look how his fingers are spread across the keyboard. They've got quite a reach, and I do appreciate how his little pinky is jutting out there. Naturally, it's what you do with the pinky that counts..."
"I see he's wearing a dark woollen sweater with chunky cuffs. He'll certainly be a sweater after I've pulled his cuff back a few times. No need to be coy; let's see those hairy wrists in action, my sweet."
"Furthermore, I note what a pronounced snout he has. It's almost like a beak. You won't hear any complaints from me. I do love a good pecker."
"Perhaps we could work on his books together, though I should warn him that I have been known to make the occasional double entry. Let's just hope he's projecting for inflation. I've a feeling that his assets are only going to increase in the very near future..."
"Note his veiny, chiselled hands there. They're so craggy and masculine that they're making my own veins pop out.
"Also, we should note that he's wearing a brown leather blazer. My leathery blazer rarely starts out as brown... but it usually is by the end."