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CELEBRATING THOR: THE DARK WORLD DAY - HERE ARE 20 QUESTIONABLE THOR COSTUMES!

22/10/2015

1 Comment

 
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Yessss! Today is the day! Two years ago this very "Thorsday", Thor: The Dark World was released in cinemas!

​To celebrate this cinematic milestone, this beloved pop cultural landmark, men, women and children across the entire developed world have today downed tools, parted their lips to the skies, and croaked: "Yes. Yes, this is the day we celebrate the release of Thor: The Dark World, the second of the Thor movies, which happened exactly two years ago on this date."

Here is Digitiser2000's contribution to the celebrations: 20 questionable attempts at Thor-based cosplay - coupled to some sharp pop cultural references! As Thor would say: "You have my hammer!"

20. RICK WAKEMAN
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Look! He's like some sort of cross between Rick Wakeman and a giant beetle! Ha ha. Who's Rick Wakeman? What do you mean by that? He's a bona-fide prog rock god, and the keyboardist in the band Yes. That's right - he's from the 1970s. Is he still in Yes? No. He's 66, and not in the best of health.
19. RICHARD E. GRANT
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You think you've heard of Richard E. Grant, but you're not sure? Was he in Downton Abbey? We don't know. We've never even watched Downton Abbey. We know him from Withnail and I, and Spiceworld: The Movie. He's always in things. You must know who he is. Richard E. Grant?
18. JUSTIN LEE COLLINS
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Yes - that's right. We mean the Justin Lee-Collins who presented TV shows and shouted a lot in lieu of any discernible charm or tal... no, admittedly he hasn't been on telly in a few years, but we don't see what difference that makes. And this Thor doesn't even look that much like him anyway? Well, why don't you marry him if you know so much about him, eh?!
17. JOEY TEMPEST
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You remember Joey Tempest: he was the singer out of the band Europe. We thought he had an appropriate name (Thor is the god of thunder, so... y'know... storms... tempest...). Europe? You must know Europe. They did that song - The Final Countdown. Yes, that's correct - it came out in 1986. What's your point?
16. PRINCE WILLIAM
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Even you must know what Prince William looks like. What's that? You do know what Prince William looks like, and this man doesn't look anything like him? Fine. FINE. Let's say he's someone out of The Hunger Games then. Is that better? Is that more your sort of thing? Or... or...  he's The Maze Runner, or Dapper Laughs, or a funny cat meme, or something like that. Better? Are we talking your language now?
15. BENNY FROM ABBA
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You've surely heard of Abba? You have, but you don't know what they looked like? Well, that's hardly our fault, if all your cultural references are only about things that happened in the last five minutes. Get out there. Educate yourself. What do you think Wikipedia is for, idiot?
14. GRIZZLY ADAMS
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Just Google him.
13. RONALD MCDONALD
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There you go. Happy now? You've heard of him, haven't you? Yeah, you like him don't you? He puts burgers and chips in your dirty mouth. Nom nommy nom.
12.  RUSSELL CROWE
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Russell Crowe - the Australian Beefcake. Gladiator. The Man of Steel. The Silver Brumby. He's 51 you know, and doesn't - as yet - repulse. Oh, but wait: your mind probably can't perceive anyone over the age of 28 or so? Aw, poor baby. Poor wittle baby who can't acknowledge anything that isn't all shiny and new. Does baby want their bottle-wottle?! Waaah. Waaaaaaah!
11. JARED LETO
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We don't even know who Jared Leto is. But he's probably the sort of person you're familiar with. Look how cool he is, with his leathered legs a-splay.
10. ANTONY WORRALL-THOMPSON
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Yeah, the TV chef. What do you mean he's not on TV anymore, because he went a bit funny, and tried to shoplift some wine and cheese from Tesco? We've all done it. It's no reason to penalise the self-styled "Cinnamon Hobbit". You try getting to his age and not cracking. It'll happen. Trust us on this. Oh yeah... it's all waiting for you in the years ahead... all of it.
9. CHRIS HEMSWORTH
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Imagine if the actor Chris Hemsworth (Red Dawn, Snow White and the Huntsman, Rush) had longer hair. He'd look almost exactly like this fellow, whose light-up torso discs only lead us to ponder just how much his moobs must be sweating. Chris Hemsworth is 32, so he's probably effectively dead to you.
8. PETER DINKLAGE
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He's in Game of Thrones, so we know you know who he is. Everyone loves Game of Thrones, don't they? Oh, and Breaking Bad. Oh yes - we must all watch Breaking Bad and Game of Thrones. There's boobs and violence in one, and drugs in the other. How very cool and edgy. No, we've not seen Game of Thrones or Breaking Bad. No, we've never seen anything else Peter Dinklage is in either. Yes, the picture we saw of him was just a headshot. What does that have to do with anything?
7. PETE TOWNSHEND
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Everyone's heard of The Who, so we flat out refuse to believe that you don't know what Peter Townshend looks like. What's that - not only do you not know what he looks like, but you'd never even heard his name until now, and you have no intention of doing any further research?
6. CEX EMPLOYEE
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This is probably what you look like.
5. JUSTIN HAWKINS
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He's in The Darkness. He's got long hair. Or used to. Care.
4. ETHAN HAWKE
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Or someone like that.
3. A YOUNG STEVE JOBS
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Yeah. The man who invented that phone you're permanently glued to.
2. WHATEVER
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Do you think that's funny? Do you? People die from putting plastic bags on their heads. Why do you think they've started charging 5p for them? It's to discourage the depressed.
1. A YOUTUBER
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Happy now?
FROM THE ARCHIVE:
THE 15 GREATEST EVER BACK TO THE FUTURE MOMENTS
THE GREAT STAR WARS BAKE-OFF! 23 TERRIBLE STAR WARS CAKES
WHAT THESE 21 STUPID KIDS STUCK IN CLAW MACHINES CAN TEACH US ABOUT THE PURSUIT OF MATERIAL WEALTH



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1 Comment
Jon link
22/10/2015 11:49:43 am

But of course once upon a time Rick Wakeman WAS Thor (and no I do not have a lisp)

http://www.slate.com/content/dam/slate/articles/arts/prog_spring/1207_ProgSpring_Part4_Lisztomania.jpg.CROP.article568-large.jpg

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