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ARE THESE THE WORST COMPUTER SHOP NAMES EVER?

18/10/2016

13 Comments

 
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There's something a bit depressing about computer shops, isn't there? Not games shops - but those independent businesses which repair computers, and sell bits of technology to plug into your computers. Plus, there are SO many of them. 

Obviously, it's a cutthroat marketplace, and making your business stand-out with a snappy and memorable name is a necessity. Some people, however, just take it too far...
Uh... that's... interesting. It makes no sense, and it's also somewhat unwieldy to say.

"Hello, PC MAC-gicians." 

"Hi. My PC Mac is broken. Can you gician it for me?"
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Yes, there really is a place called Troon. It's in Scotland. "I'm catching a troon to Troon," Scottish people might say, in that funny voice they have. Perhaps a "computroon" is what people from Troon call a computer.

In fact, maybe they add "Troon" to everything. "I can't come out tonight - I'm staying in to watch Strictly on the teletroon."

It's difficult to know for sure without actually catching a troon there. Nevertheless, the name of this shop reads as little more than the product of mental wrongness to the rest of us.
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Yes. Yes, very good. Very good pun. What a shame you don't also sell retro computer hardware, for then you could've called your shop "PCs of 8-Bit". Do you see? And then you could've forced your staff to dress up as pirates and get scurvy.
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You can picture the manager of this shop, can't you? Striding around with his bluetooth earpiece, climbing repeatedly in and out of his Jaguar, and acting for all intents like he owns the world. He probably treats his staff like dirt.

Their hearts must sink whenever he says he'll accompany them on their Friday night drinks... for they know that it will inevitably end in a trip to a strip club, and their paymaster becoming aggressive and abusive with the dancers.
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Conceptex? What means this, plz? It means nothing. It's just some syllables slapped together to sound vaguely high-tech.
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Here's another thoroughly meaningless name. What does it mean? WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!?! What. Does. It. MEAN?! Meeeeeeean! What's really funny is that they weren't even quick enough to nab the website Compucom.com...
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Mate... mate, for reals? You're not going to get anybody in your shop if on the one hand you're offering to repair and service computers, and then - on the other hand - profess that you "destroy" them. They really didn't think this through.
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It doesn't matter whether your surname really is Hitler - there are connotations, and slapping it on the front of your computershop is hardly inviting custom.
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On one level they've tried to sound futuristic and sci-fi-y by spelling the word scrotum with a Z. On another level... they've inexplicably called their shop Zcrotum Technology.
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They're not even trying with this one. Nothing about this name suggests computer sales and repairs. Unbelievable.
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FROM THE ARCHIVE:
CAN YOU SURVIVE THE ULTIMATE OSTRICH STARE-DOWN?
ALL THE GAMES SYSTEMS MY STUPID PARENTS WERE TOO CRUEL TO EVER BUY FOR ME
ARE THESE THE FUNNIEST RAM MAN MEMES EVER?!
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13 Comments
sunteam link
18/10/2016 11:43:01 am

Someone didn't get enough Photoshop training.

Reply
Pisshole Corner
18/10/2016 05:14:06 pm

And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling compression artefacts!

Reply
Chinnyhill
18/10/2016 11:49:28 am

I'm hearing Smiley Miley will be taking legal action over 'Bits and PC's'

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David
18/10/2016 11:51:49 am

How bad does your eyesight have to be not to notice that the website says "Computer Corner" in the last picture?

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Lemon Farl
18/10/2016 01:30:03 pm

Sadly Zcrotum Technoloy closed down. Anyone know somewhere else I can do my local & international faxing?

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Lemon Farl
18/10/2016 02:32:13 pm

Never mind, "we destroy Computers" is near me - they might do local faxing.
Also they are literally next door to the British Lawnmower Museum!
http://tinyurl.com/hm5oh6x

Amazingmikeyc
18/10/2016 11:54:49 am

you nearly had me until I realised that I knew where "Hitler Zone" was and it's not called Hitler Zone. But I had to check anyway.

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Chinnyhill10
18/10/2016 11:57:09 am

Our local software shop was called Hitler Games. Well it was by all the local kids anyway as the owner looked like Hitler.

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Lemon Farl
18/10/2016 12:58:11 pm

This IS CompuTroon!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tK1yUAQazvE

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Alex
18/10/2016 03:06:09 pm

That jingle is soo local radio :-)

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Kelvin Green link
18/10/2016 07:01:20 pm

My local computer shop growing up in Uckfield was called Bytes 'n' PCs.

I bought Frontier: Elite II there.

For the Amiga.

Reply
Elitehubs link
9/11/2020 08:52:59 am

Thanks for providing this amazing information, Now I know a lot more about laptop repair and maintenance process.

Reply
anonymous link
1/6/2021 09:53:59 am

Now a day all peoples are buying online

Reply



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