That was going to change today. I was going to do a rather tongue-in-cheek feature... and then I woke up this morning to the news of the Manchester terrorist attack, and - suddenly - being funny felt like the wrong approach.
Don't worry. I know, I know, that if we change our behaviour we're letting the terrorists win, and all that. Normal service will be resumed shortly.
Nevertheless, this has affected me - like I'm sure it has you. It happened here, at home, to ordinary people on a night out. This wasn't soldiers or policemen being targeted. It was normal kids at a concert.
I'm not going to do that thing where I try to tangentially act as if I've some massive personal stake in this - "Oh, my cousin knows someone who sort of thinks he knows somebody who might've once been to Manchester" - but nevertheless, this particular incident has hit me more than most.
It's the fact that the intended targets seemed to be teenage girls - the same ages as my step-daughters (indeed, one of their best friends was meant to be seeing Ariana Grande later this week) - means that this time it really feels as if it could've been us. I remember taking my eldest daughter to a Steps concert years ago, and waiting for her in the atrium, like many of the parents who were no doubt doing the same last night. This one feels very real to me.
Apologies if this ends up being a stream-of-consciousness ramble. It'll have nothing to with video games... but I'm processing what it means to me, what it means to all of us in the grand scheme of things. I just want to write something.
Generally, I strive to stay rational and grounded when it comes to what is labelled terrorism. I mean, even the term feels dangerously loaded to me.
There are murders and attacks and assaults all the time which scarcely get reported on, because they've not been carried out by so-called Islamic extremists. The weight given to a "terrorist" attack - by the media and the authorities - often feels disproportionate, and delivers exactly the sort of propaganda victory the "terrorists" want.
Anyone who commits a murder has wiring that has gone wrong, but they're all murderers. The only reason to label any one of them differently is in the pursuit of some ideological crusade. Us versus them. It feels as if there's something inherently racist about it.
Many of my generation grew up in the era of the IRA bombings. Twice - without realising - I walked right past an IRA bomb (or, at least, the site of where they were planted) in the hours before they exploded. I walked past the Admiral Duncan pub in Old Compton Street the day before that was blown up. I was meant to go into London for a meeting on the morning of the 7/7 bombings. And so on and on.
I don't think it ever affected my day-to-day life. It still always somehow seemed remote. I mean, in the grand scheme, there's virtually no chance any of us will be blown-up by terrorists. Statistically, we're much more likely to be killed by falling off a ladder.
Then there's that part of me which gets angry at how terrorist killings are politicised compared to similar attacks by lone nuts. A man drove his car into a crowd in the middle of Times Square last week - echoing the recent Westminster attack - but because he wasn't a Muslim extremist, it was virtually forgotten about the next day. The news cycle just moved on.
Then there's that other part of me which wonders just how many innocent people in Middle Eastern countries have been killed by wars or military action that the UK has been part of - that have been carried out, essentially, in my name.
How much has our intervention in that region caused this extremism? What right do we have to be outraged when they do the same to us? Who should we really be angry at?
And then something like yesterday's bombing happens, and because it's teenage girls who were the target, it suddenly brings it all home, and I get the anger and the rage and the fear that can lead to the rise of extreme points of view; how we can end up with a situation like Brexit. Why the likes of UKIP and Trump were able to capitalise on those fears.
Ironically, it's likely the exact same anger, rage, fear and sense of impotence in the face of a far more powerful enemy which extremists feel. It might not be rational, it might not be decent, but it's a natural, very human, response. When people are cornered, when they are scared, they lash out, or try to remove what they believe is the source of that threat. Most of us, if our loved ones or way of life were threatened, would do anything to protect it.
Yet my teenage stepdaughters have Muslim best friends. Girls who are Ariana Grande fans just like them, from families who are no more extremist than we are. In my life, I've never met a Muslim who expressed anything other than the same dismay at terrorism that I'm feeling right now. In fact, it seems even more personal to them because they know they're going to be blamed.
And I'm saying this in the knowledge, at this point in time, that none of us know that this suicide attack is even linked to Islamic extremism.
If I'm jumping to that conclusion, you can imagine the fervour the far-right have been whipped up into this morning. But, much as it pains me to admit... outside of certain professional trolls, I get it - I get the prejudice, I get the subtle brainwashing we've all been witness to. I get the anger, the fear, and the resentment, because I feel it too. I just refuse to let it take a hold of me.
We have to be better than that.
We don't defeat terrorism - an ideology with no centralised structure - with our bombs, any more than suicide bombers will achieve their murky agenda by ripping apart families at an Ariana Granda concert. Anyone who is capable of taking a deep breath and being rational will know this. It's like firing a shotgun at a cloud to stop it raining.
The only way we defeat it is by stripping away the power of the word "terrorist". We have to do away with that word altogether. It is inherently dangerous.
Terrorism is described as an effort to achieve political aims by inflicting fear into the hearts of a civilian population. By somehow equating every terrorist incident with some shadowy, Bond-like, supervillan organisation we give them the precise power that they want. There's a reason that "terrorist" incidents happen in high-profile, public ways, because it's about using the media to further their agenda, and time and again the media and our politicians play into their hands. They actively collude with those who seek to hurt us.
Plus, we defeat it by standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Muslim communities, and showing them - for want of a better term - our love. We show kindness, not fear, not aggression nor anger. We don't add more fuel to the fear fire.
There has to be a different approach to all this. Everything we've tried so far has failed, or made the situation worse. We never had Muslims blowing up concerts when I was a kid. We have to ask what has happened on the world stage to get us here?!
The IRA only stopped bombing us as a result of people sitting down and trying to understand one another. It was a peace process - not a war process. More fear, more aggression, more blame, just perpetuates the cycle.
And it has to end, because I don't want somebody I love getting blown up on a night out - and I doubt you do either.
I feel for the families of the Manchester dead. I feel for everyone who was caught up in this, and witnessed something that will scar them for the rest of their lives. I feel for every Muslim in Britain who, once again, must know that they'll be considered part of the problem by ignorant people.
This world often feels messed-up and wrong right now, but I truly believe that the good still outweighs the bad. This was one murderous prick who destroyed lives and families of countless more good people who had no stake in any bigger agenda. He was a murderer, whose values had likely been twisted by an ideology that was perpetuated as much by whoever put those ideas into his head, as our own media and governments.
Don't let the fear get the better of you. For all our sakes, stay strong. Stay rational. Be the kind of person you would want to be... and know in your heart that you can be. Don't let these sorts of incidents take hold of your darker, more base, instincts. Prove to yourself that love can be stronger than anything.
Please play nice in the comments.