Having established successfully that clowns are the most horrible people ever, it's little wonder that Ronald McDonald has all but disappeared from most McDonald's literature and promotional material.
Yet still he remains, appearing in commercials as recently as 2014, albeit sporting a more modern look, and still lending his name to McDonald's children's charity - the Ronald McDonald House (which to our ears sounds like the scene of a horrible murder - "You don't want to buy that place... didn't the realtor tell you - that's the Ronald McDonald House?!").
Alas, even in his modern incarnation the alabaster skin and blood-stained mouth and chin still remain. Surely, when you really consider him, Ronald McDonald is the most terrifying and misjudged corporate mascot of them all.
Here are 16 examples of why Ronald McDonald has provided nightmare fuel to generations of junk food-loving children.
Yet still he remains, appearing in commercials as recently as 2014, albeit sporting a more modern look, and still lending his name to McDonald's children's charity - the Ronald McDonald House (which to our ears sounds like the scene of a horrible murder - "You don't want to buy that place... didn't the realtor tell you - that's the Ronald McDonald House?!").
Alas, even in his modern incarnation the alabaster skin and blood-stained mouth and chin still remain. Surely, when you really consider him, Ronald McDonald is the most terrifying and misjudged corporate mascot of them all.
Here are 16 examples of why Ronald McDonald has provided nightmare fuel to generations of junk food-loving children.
16. BREATHING HEAVILY AFTER A LATE NIGHT
"Hurrrrrrrrr. I was loving it a bit too much last night if you know what I mean, lads... <WINK>"
15. TRYING TO NOT LOOK CREEPY AND FAILING UTTERLY
"I'm really loving not being a creepy clown. Yes I am most definitely."
14. POSING WITH A CHILD WITHOUT BEING ASKED TO
"Heh heh heh - she's loving it..."
13. HITTING A BOY IN THE FACE WITH HIS MAIL BAG
"Shut-up. You fakking love it."
12. EATING A CHILD FOR HIS LUNCH
"I'm gonna love it (eating you)."
11. LAUGHING AT A CRYING INFANT
"Hahahaha! Listen to her - she's loving it!"
10. WRITING DEATH THREATS
"Warwick Davis is gonna love getting these... heh heh heh..."
9. POSING WITH THE MAN WHO SHARPENS HIS TEETH FOR HIM
"I'm loving it when they're really sharp like needles, don't I, Santiago?"
8. BEING GRIPPED WITH A SUDDEN EXISTENTIAL REALISATION OF HIS OWN HORROR
"I... I'm... I'm not sure I'm loving it anymore."
7. WINKING CREEPILY
"You fakking love it you do!"
6. SLAPPING A FAT BOY
"You're gonna love what I'm about to do to fatty boom-boom."
5. STEALING CHILDREN IN HIS FLYING BOX
"You're gonna fakking loving it where we're going (my villa in Malta)!"
4. STEALING ANOTHER CHILD
'Heh heh. Loving it she is."
3. BURSTING OUT OF YOUR WARDROBE WHILE YOU'RE GETTING DRESSED
"WOZNIAK!!!"
2. DESTROYING NEW YORK
"I'm gonna love shoving everyone here up my dirty fakking bum hole."
1. SHIVERING IN A BOX
"I'm l... l.... l... l... lo... lo... loving.... lov.... l... l... l... l..."
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