DIGITISER
  • MAIN PAGE
  • Features
  • Videos
  • Game Reviews
  • FAQ

16 DELICIOUS SPAM RECIPES

29/9/2015

8 Comments

 
Picture
Let's all give thanks for Spam. Invented in 1937, and later gaining popularity during World War 2, over seven billion cans of this unspecific meat product have been sold around the world.

Spam is well known for its versatility - and has left an indelible mark on our popular culture, from Monty Python to unsolicited emails about penis enlargement solutions.

But what can you make using Spam today? Here are 16 delicious Spam recipes that you might wish to try at home.

16. PLANKED SPAM
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, mashed potato, tomatoes, mollusc shells, green bits, wood. METHOD: Grill ingredients. Put on lump of old wood. Garnish with mollusc shells and green bits. Serve to tramp.
15. SPAM 'N' LIMAS
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, lima beans, salt. METHOD: Fill frying pan with salt. Grill other ingredients. Arrange in concentric circular pattern atop salt. Throw at moon.
14. SPAM BIRDS
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, green bits, peas(?), psoriasis, spikes. METHOD: Grill ingredients. Stuff spam with psoriasis, roll up, and shove in spikes for added jeopardy. Add green bits for garnish. Find some use for peas(?). Bury in garden.
13. SPAM UPSIDE DOWN PIE
Picture
 INGREDIENTS: Spam, rat pie, yellow gruel, green crayons. METHOD: Bake pie until probably cooked. Turn upside down. Garnish with spam, green crayons, and bowl of yellow gruel. Leave outside crematorium.
12. SPAM HOLIDAY RECIPES
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, whatever other crap you have lying around and need to finish off before it goes past the use-by date. METHOD: Shout "SPAM!" in response to every question.
11. SPAM 'N' HORMEL CHILI
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, Hormel chili, green bits. METHOD: Cook chill. Put a load of Spam on top. Garnish with green bits. Post anonymously to unsuspecting friend or relation.
10. SPAM 'N' WAFFLES
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, waffles, butter, jug of whisky. METHOD: Grill ingredients. Drink whisky directly from jug. DO NOT GARNISH WITH GREEN BITS. Drop in bath.
9. SPAM AND EGGS
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, fried eggs, green bits. METHOD: Fry ingredients. Garnish with green bits. Throw at husband's stupid, lazy face.
8. GRACIE ALLEN'S BAKED SPAM
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, green bits, orange cubes. METHOD: Grill ingredients. Garnish with green bits and orange cubes. Collect cheque.
7. SPAM KABOBS NEAPOLITAN
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, other stuff, fencing foil. METHOD: Arrange ingredients on fencing foil. Place over hot barbecue. Cook until bored. Insert into pelican.
6. BAKED BEAN SPAMWICH
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, baked beans, bread, green stuff, peach half, whale blubber. METHOD: Arrange ingredients on bread. Place on plate. Force-feed to boy.
5. SPAM 'N' SPAGHETTI "FOR DICK"
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, green bits, spaghetti, crispy leper skin. METHOD: Grill ingredients. Garnish with green bits and crispy leper skin. Take on day trip to zoo.
4. SPAM 'N' SALAD
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, green hair, pretzel sticks, bull's testicle. METHOD: Cook bull's testicle until it bursts. Arrange on plate with other ingredients. Wonder why.
3. SPAM 'N' CHEESE RIBBON LOAF
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, boiled eggs, block of lard, salad. METHOD: Slice Spam and lard into equal oblongs. Stick oblongs together. Place beneath trough.
2. SPAM 'N' SCALLOPED POTATOES
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, potatoes. METHOD: Work it out. It can't be that difficult. Perform mysterious, nude ritual.
1. SPAM 'N' YAMS
Picture
INGREDIENTS: Spam, yams, lambs, clams, jam and green bits. METHOD: Fry Spam, yams, lambs, clams and jam. Arrange in dish. Garnish with green bits. Destroy.
FROM THE ARCHIVE:
HOW TO MAKE BEER FROM BEER-FLAVOURED THINGS
BEST EVER VIDEO GAME EASTER EGGS


8 Comments
Chris
29/9/2015 12:18:51 pm

I can't help thinking these meals would be improved if they had less spam in them. Especially #2: Scalloped potatoes are lovely. Spam; not so much.

Reply
Graham Chapman
29/9/2015 01:28:10 pm

Have you got anything without Spam in it?

Reply
Terry Jones
1/10/2015 10:19:11 am

NO SPAM? UUUGGGHHH!

Reply
John
29/9/2015 03:20:54 pm

Spam! Now also served with accompaniments that don't rhyme!

Reply
Granthon S
29/9/2015 05:05:39 pm

We've not had a Digitiser Eats for a while, Biffo: get cooking that Spam.

Reply
Mr Biffo
29/9/2015 05:13:45 pm

Started one last weekend... but temporarily shelved it, as I "had a cold". Also Stefan the Neighbour's next appearance, and a video debut for The Living Bum (though we got that footage recorded - it's quite something...).

Reply
ChorltonWheelie
29/9/2015 07:10:54 pm

"unspecific meat product" you say?

Well, in the early eighties I had the pleasure of working in the Spam factory in Liverpool (I was a sparks doing industrial refrigeration) what struck me over the overpowering smell of spice and the exceedingly rare accent was the sight of the meat heading into the production line.

Before processing it was a fine and full shoulder/leg of pork, not the arseholes and eyelids of your catering sausages.

If that pig had been born on the Iberian peninsular it would have been expertly cured to become one of the finest foods on earth.

In England the same cut of meat became Spam.

Are you not proud?

Reply
Voodoo76
29/9/2015 08:43:14 pm

Absolute hilarity, so so funny well done. 'Wonder why' had me in stitches!!

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    This section will not be visible in live published website. Below are your current settings:


    Current Number Of Columns are = 2

    Expand Posts Area =

    Gap/Space Between Posts = 12px

    Blog Post Style = card

    Use of custom card colors instead of default colors = 1

    Blog Post Card Background Color = current color

    Blog Post Card Shadow Color = current color

    Blog Post Card Border Color = current color

    Publish the website and visit your blog page to see the results

    Picture
    Support Me on Ko-fi
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    RSS Feed Widget
    Picture

    Picture
    Tweets by @mrbiffo
    Picture
    Follow us on The Facebook

    Picture

    Archives

    December 2022
    May 2022
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    November 2020
    September 2020
    July 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014


    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • MAIN PAGE
  • Features
  • Videos
  • Game Reviews
  • FAQ