They say the past is another country. If that is indeed the case, then that country would be called Creepyweirdinappropriatelyingland.
Nowadays, there are all sorts of rules governing what you can and can't say when you're selling your products. Medicine needs to be backed up by research, rather than far-fetched, crackpot claims. Food that's bad for you needs to say as much.
Heck, you can't even smoke a nice cigarette without being made to feel it's killing you, rather than making you strong and vigorous.
Here are 15 peculiar magazine and newspaper ads from the days before the Nanny State started interfering.
Nowadays, there are all sorts of rules governing what you can and can't say when you're selling your products. Medicine needs to be backed up by research, rather than far-fetched, crackpot claims. Food that's bad for you needs to say as much.
Heck, you can't even smoke a nice cigarette without being made to feel it's killing you, rather than making you strong and vigorous.
Here are 15 peculiar magazine and newspaper ads from the days before the Nanny State started interfering.
15. What can you buy for 39 cents these days? Virtually nothing. Once upon a time your creepy child could experience great fun and satisfaction - and, presumably, death - by expanding their lungs using a "handsomely decorated" mechanical stimulator.
14. A slogan worthy of Donald Trump: "Colt Revolvers - acceptable for the reason that for over 70 years they have been".
13. "Pull the cords" - and ring your fat face like a church bell, you fat fatty.
12. Asthma: stopped in its tracks by lung cancer.
11. The message is clear: the only way to rid yourself of an alcoholic husband is to poison him in secret.
10. That poor clerk, being beaten to death by a psychotic Irishwoman, for the crime of bringing her "Substitute" brand cornflakes...
9. Obviously, NO home can be truly happy without a realistic rubber baby...
8. Remember that common phrase, "To shoot up like a biscuit"? Remember that? We've all said it; "The cat started sicking up a hairball, and I shot up out of my chair like a biscuit".
7. "How best to sell our soap, Mr Larkins? I propose a campaign focused around a gang of spindly-legged elves shooting bears in the face with a shotgun."
6. Why be ruptured? Why indeed...
5. Bumstead. Worm syrup. Willie. This has it all.
4. Renew your life by electrocuting your genitals.
3. Invalids experience great joy when you run an electrified brush over their brains.
2. Children... your hideous ears can only be cured by one thing: an absurd cap which draws even more attention to your disgraceful deformity. Also keeps your hair tidy at night.
1. Not only will you get $5.00 a day to wear this horrible suit, but L.E. Asher will make you a "surprising liberal offer"...
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