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10 VINTAGE GERMAN ATARI ADS EXPLAINED

21/9/2016

3 Comments

 
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When I was 15, I went on a school trip to Germany, where we visited the theme park Phantasialand. During the day, my classmates and I befriended a group of naughty German boys, and we did our bit for European unity by teaching one another swear words in our respective languages.

Also, one of the German boys stole a load of candy floss from a little kid by ripping it out of the boy's hand and shoving it in his mouth, which was as shocking as it was funny. Ever since that day, I've harboured a certain respect for the German sense of humour. 

Apropos nothing, here are ten German print ads for the Atari 2600, which display that unique humour in all its glory.
Here we see a family of three screaming in terror, while playing a game featuring a kangaroo - a creature feared in Bavarian culture.

On New Year's Eve, Bavarians believe, every child is visited in their sleep by
 
Die Nacht Känguru - who slips a "luck mollusc" into their mouths; the child's fortunes over the coming year will  depend entirely on whether the kangaroo has deployed a good luck mollusc, or a bad luck mollusc.

In this picture we see the father is birthing a younger version of himself, which represents an externalisation of his Freudian id - his pleasure centres are literally leaving his body. His son (left) has dressed for battle, taking on the mantle of the family protector in the wake of his father's fear-induced paralysis. This personifies his imminent ascension to manhood.

The mother (right) has her hands bound, which is a metaphorical depiction of how she too is imprisoned by her own primal fears.

​It might seem strange to us, but most Germans would find this 
tableaux howlingly funny.
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Due to the language barrier, it's impossible to know the game that is being promoted here, but we can make some assumptions about the cultural context of the image.

The roles of the two workmen are played respectively by German quiz show host Rollo Benny, and the Hollywood actor John Travolta - a man to whom Germans display an almost pious worship. Indeed, you can see this here in the form of the two angelic women fawning over him, making crude and - as we now know - futile sexual overtures.

In a desperate bid for their attention, Rollo Benny is performing his trademark squawk - a noise he has deployed throughout his career in lieu of anything resembling recognisable comedic material. Most Germans are prepared to forgive this, because it really is a very funny noise.
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There is no literal translation of this image outside of the native German, but rest assured that its place in German comedy history is akin to that bit in Only Fools And Horses where Del Boy falls through the bar.
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Again, as in previous images, these four anarchists are shrieking in horror. The one on the left has become so distressed that his chair has spun around of its own volition. Unlike his peers - who are screaming because they are imagining a goblin - his fear is that the others are merely tolerating him.

The irony of this is that the more he fears his exclusion from the group, the more he over-compensates with whimsy and clownish behaviour, rendering him ever more unlikeable. That may seem a rather tragic set of circumstances to us, but Germans find it hysterical.

During a 2011 poll, Germans were asked what their favourite joke was, and they voted overwhelmingly for "That one where the boy f
ears his exclusion from the screaming group, but the more he over compensates with whimsy and clownish behaviour, the more unlikeable he becomes".

Second in the poll was a joke about a chicken not understanding the principles of inertia.
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This morally dubious tableaux depicts a Lolita-like relationship between the couple on the left of the image. The boy on the right suspects that there is something going on between his girlfriend and his father, but lacks the strength of character to confront them directly.

This has long been a traditional German comedic set-up, pre-dating even the Napoleonic Wars. Napoleon is said to have once laughed so hard at the thought of the scenario that he fell off his stool!
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Again, as with the previous image, we have another cross-generational relationship -  albeit with a certain reversal of roles. This time, the one feeling left out is an older woman, while her younger lover - a freak - flirts with her sister.

​This undercutting of the more traditional scenario is a precursor to the rise of German alternative comedy in the late-1980s, most of which involved pensioner women being unlucky in love, and freaks.
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The gentleman, centre - a sports coach - is gripped with chronic bowel pains, his Crohn's disease rendering him inert, as all around display an empathic connection to his distress. The boy, second left, is preparing to relieve the troublesome blockage in his coach's colon, so that he may continue to teach them a sport.

The elements of this scenario are sufficient to cause such amusement in a German as to make them literally vomit up their sternums with mirth.
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It's hard to discuss the intended joke in this picture without venturing into territory which most other cultures would find offensive. Germans, however, have no restraint when it comes to mocking those who might be less fortunate or able.
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Much as they do with John Travolta and David Hasselhoff, the Germans have an inexplicable fondness for the actor and comedian Shane Richie.

Here we see him (right) at the 1980s peak of his German popularity - around the time he was given the keys to the city of Berlin, when the country's then-chancellor, Helmut Kohl, declared Richie's birthday a national holiday.

​Richie would not need to do anything to make a German laugh - he'd just need to turn up (as seen in this photograph). Sadly for his career, this rarely worked in his native Britain, where most people merely tolerate him.
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She screams, begging him to stop, while he pushes forwards, passive and oblivious to her protestations. Again, show this to any German and they'd laugh so hard they'd soil themselves, often for up to four or five hours at a time.
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FROM THE ARCHIVE:
SO MOVING... 11 BEAUTIFUL BAPTISM PHOTOS
21 PHOTOS OF KIDS WHO ARE TERRIFIED OF HALLOWEEN
​
12 LUCKY KIDS WHO COULDN'T BE HAPPIER ABOUT THEIR MARIO FACE PAINTING

3 Comments
Chinnyhill
21/9/2016 12:34:19 pm

Phantasialand sounds like Germanys largest swingers club......

Reply
Jens
21/9/2016 12:37:55 pm

There is a certain humour between the text of the adverts and the description. Similar to when English people tell me they like Rammstein, and I'm just wondering if they REALLY know what they're listening to...

Reply
Christopher Wyatt
21/9/2016 09:41:27 pm

That was spiely interesting. Danke you.

Reply



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