DIGITISER
  • MAIN PAGE
  • Features
  • Videos
  • Game Reviews
  • FAQ

10 REASONS WHY MEGA DRIVE WAS A BETTER NAME THAN GENESIS

16/4/2019

23 Comments

 
Picture
Yesterday, we discussed why our beloved European Super Nintendo was infinitely superior to the American Super Nintendo.

Today we shall investigate the two different names for Sega's 16-bit console - known as the Mega Drive or Genesis, depending upon which side of the Atlantic you squatted.

Why did the Mega Drive - the name it launched with in Japan in 1989 - get called something different when it came out in the US, despite Mega Drive clearly being one of the best names for a games console that anybody has ever been arsed to think of?

It was all down to trademark. In America, Mega Drive Systems Inc - a manufacturer of computer storage solutions - already had the name Mega Drive in their pocket. Thus, they went for Genesis, as a way of suggesting that the console would mark the real dawn of home video gaming.

Admittedly, Genesis isn't the worst name in the world, but it already had other associations, dependent on whether you were a creationist or a prog rock fan - neither of which were cool or edgy.

But which was better? SPOILER: It was "Mega Drive", obviously.

​And here's why. 
MEGA DRIVE MAKES SENSE IN CONTEXT
Picture
Mega Drive - two words - feels like it follows logically on from Master System. Plus, Mega Drive and Master System sound like the macguffins from a dystopian cyberpunk adventure. 

The only time anything called Genesis was used as a macguffin was in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, and it was a sort of bomb thing that made flowers and rabbits appear.

Which is literally the worst sort of bomb.
MEGA IS A COOL WORD
Picture
There's just something a bit preachy about Genesis. Because, probably, The Book of Genesis is  something that gets preached in church.

For some reason, I went to church for a couple of years when I was in my mid-teens, and it was awful. Like, really boring and that.

One time I got into trouble because a mate of mine had to give a reading, and his mispronounced "Gentiles" as "genitals", and I burst out laughing, and apparently laughing at "genitals" in church is frowned upon, even though Jesus had genitals, probably. And so did God. He made us in His image didn't he? So he definitely had a penis. And probably a chuff, too. 

Anyway. Where was I...?
DRIVE IS ANOTHER COOL WORD
Picture
Yeah, you could suggest that it evokes a hard drive, but only if you're already a massive nerd. To super-cool-dudes like myself, it paints a picture of driving fast along a desert road, and/or doing rudies.
GENESIS IS NOT A COOL WORD
Picture
Lest we forget that, with the exception of then-drummer Phil Collins, the band Genesis was formed at a posh private school.

Their early mentor was one Jonathan King - a man later convicted of assorted underage sex offences, including "buggery".

​Importantly, it was King who chose the name Genesis for the band - thus making Sega of America's branding of the console the sort of name a pervert would choose. 
OUR LOGO WAS BETTER THAN THEIR LOGO
Picture
Picture
The Mega Drive had a beautiful reflective chrome look, like the badge you might find on the radiator grill of a high-end supercar. The brushed steel Genesis logo looks like something a 14 year-old might've come up with in a technical drawing class while trying to hide an unscheduled erection.
FOR THAT MATTER, OUR LOGO WAS ALSO BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL JAPANESE MEGA DRIVE LOGO TOO
Picture
I mean... what is that? What does it even mean!?
THE SOUTH KOREANS THOUGHT GENESIS WAS A WORSE NAME THAN "SUPER ALADDIN BOY"
Picture
In South Korea, Sega's system was distributed and sold by Samsung, who named it the Super Gam*Boy - yes, with the asterisk and potential copyright infringement - and later rebranded it the Super Aladdin Boy.

As baffling as those names might be, the hardware nevertheless kept the Mega Drive logo on the case, rather than adopting the awful American name, thereby demonstrating that almost any old rubbish is better than calling a thing "Genesis".

Years later, Sega itself released the remodelled Mega Drive 2 in South Korea, and - again - chose not to call it the Genesis 2, suggesting that even Sega itself knew that Genesis was the weaker of the two names. 
GENESIS: POPULAR WITH DEATH METAL ACTS
Picture
In 2000, the Chilean death metal band Coprofago released an album called Genesis. Tellingly, "Coprofago" is derived from the Greek words meaning "to eat faeces". Again, the same people who thought calling them selves "Eat Faeces" are the sort of people who might think "Genesis" is a good name for a games console. 

So, that's perverts and try-hards we have now.

See also the Greek death metal band "Rotting Christ", who also had an album called Genesis. 

Sample lyric:

I saw the full face of the menstrual hecate
Four and forty virgins make the form of the gate
It is the key inside me, it is the glyph of the vision
To have a god within, under the name of legion

Love of night manifests infinitely eternally
Love of darkness signifies the enlightened life eternally

Into the divine water, deviation fulfilled
Wisdom is clear, all logic is killed
By the ancient way I project my soul
The task was given it is the death of all


What a load of wank.
THE BEST BUS IS A MEGA BUS
Picture
Putting "Mega" before another word immediately makes it better. Mega-City... megastar... megaton... Megaupload.... Mega-han Markle... 

In Europe a Megabus is a coach service that will take you long distances for as little as £1, providing you don't mind being sat next to a drug addict, or a weird loner who is travelling to meet their online lover for the first time. 

Please... do not confuse MEGA with #MAGA. Nobody wants a Sega #MAGA Drive. 

Question: how many words are improved by putting "Genesis" before it? Just ask yourself if "Genesisbus" would have worked?
THE WORST FILMS HAVE GENESIS IN THE TITLE
Picture
The worst of The Terminator movies was undoubtedly Terminator: Genisys - which would've still been an awful title even if they'd bothered to use a spell-checker. Frankly, though, how much more intrigued would you be by a movie called Terminator: Mega Drive?

I already know the answer - and it's "loads"... loads more intrigued.

​Case closed.
Picture
23 Comments
Guru Larry link
16/4/2019 10:15:34 am

Fun Fact: The Mega Drive was originally going to be named the "Sega Mark IV" in Japan as it was backwards compatible with the Mark III/Master System and SG-1000 (Mark II)

But I so wanted the next system to be named the GigaDrive, which a girl at my school insisted her Dad already owned as he worked for Sega.

Reply
Reversible Sedgewick
16/4/2019 11:35:29 am

The "Giga Drive" was the internal codename for the emulator used to create the 3DS Classics range of downloadable games. Apparently the developers started off by imagining a branching future where the Mega Drive had been upgraded to display stereoscopic widescreen images, becoming the Giga Drive. This was all explained in a downright fascinating series of interviews which Sega has now taken off the intenet completely, the big idiots.

Reply
lilock3
16/4/2019 04:05:00 pm

I think you might be 1 off there Larry. My Master System 2 has "M4Jr" on the motherboard and my Mega Drive's is labelled "M5". Unless the numbering was different outside of Japan, though I doubt it would be.

Reply
Kara Van Park
16/4/2019 10:36:25 am

Genitals are usually predated on in church, rather than frowned upon.

Reply
Floop
16/4/2019 04:22:23 pm

"preyed"
/pedantic mode

Reply
Kara Van Park
16/4/2019 06:48:31 pm

Preyed and prayed, arf!

Taucher
16/4/2019 11:21:29 am

I was surprised to learn that Megabus also operates in the USA. But your point stands even harder as they went with the UK PAL colour scheme and naming - even though arguably Megabus operates coaches not buses and they could have called it Megacoach.

The word ‘coach’ becomes really weird quite quickly if you think about it a lot.

Reply
Reversible Sedgewick
16/4/2019 11:25:08 am

"CARTRIGDE"? What happened there?

Reply
Voodoo76
16/4/2019 11:52:16 am

Excellent observation, well done.

Reply
Dansk404
16/4/2019 12:55:56 pm

I'm with you on all points except MegaBus. I LOATHE the MegaBus. Or more precisely, I loathe their bloated, gurning, pink-faced mascot, perpetually leering at you from the flanks and butt of the bus. I hate him so much, to the extent that I collapsed in uncontrollable laughter on seeing pictures of a MegaBus ON FIRE. Just pictures. Not even "in the reals".
Seethe.

Reply
Craig from the 80s link
16/4/2019 01:11:49 pm

When I was driving through Preston a few years ago, I ended up behind a Megabus with a pic of that chubby bloke on it. The emergency exit handle from the back window was black and, due to unfortunate image placement, appeared on the Megabus Man's top lip, giving him a Hitleresque look.

I was quite proud that I'd spotted Megabus Hitler, so I took a photo of him.

When I read your article it reminded me that I have a photo of Megabus Hitler somewhere, so I had a search through my phone but couldn't see it. I hoped I'd put it online...

So I googled Megabus Hitler, and was saddened to find that there are hundreds of sightings of him. I don't feel as special now.

Also, I hope IT don't audit my work PC and find out what I've been searching for.

Reply
The BV Reviewer
16/4/2019 03:36:18 pm

I have to disagree with your opinion, the Mega Drive name, sounds more terrible than Genesis, Genesis sounds a lot more better, Mega Drive sounds posh, and the best bus isn't a Mega Bus, it's a Desert Bus

Reply
lilock3
16/4/2019 04:07:20 pm

Actually, the best type of bus is a bendy bus! However I fully accept that "Bendy Drive" is not a great name for a console...

Reply
Phil
28/4/2019 12:40:10 pm

Mega Bender?

Reply
Neptunium
16/4/2019 04:24:19 pm

I obviously agree with most of that (the Japanese MD logo is obviously the best, and "HIGH GRADE MULTIPURPOSE USE" is just an amazing sentence in it's own right, but let's face it the Notorious BIG couldn't have rapped any better than "Super Nintendo Sega Genesis, when I was dead broke man I couldn't picture this". "Super Nintendo Sega Mega Drive, when I was eating potatoes I fattened up my thighs" just doesn't have the same ring to it.

Reply
Dr Glovario
27/4/2019 07:37:07 am

“Super Nintendo, Atari Lynx - I’ve just been in the bog, give it 5 mins IT STINKS”

Reply
Robobob
16/4/2019 07:11:23 pm

Genisys wasn't the worst Terminator film, in my view anyway. It was the second worst. Terminator 3 is the biggest stink up.

Genisys is semi-alright for the first 25 minutes or so when they replay a sort of twisted version of the first Terminator film, and then have a Jet Li T-1000 battle. All that...not too bad actually. Then they have a choice of going to 1997 or 2017. If they'd gone to 1997 and basically played the same game with them interfering in a twisted version of T2, it would have worked out at fairly decent film I reckon, unoriginal but sort of cool seeing the different timelines intertwine a little bit like the Back To The Future trilogy. But instead they went to 2017 and just went generic and it sort of meh'd it's way to the end from then on.

But still better than Terminator 3 - albeit the name is SHITE.

Reply
James Walker
16/4/2019 11:48:30 pm

Terminator Salvation was complete dogshit too. I haven’t been to a cinema for ten fucking years because of that thing.

Reply
Paul
17/4/2019 01:10:23 pm

Terminator: Mega Dryve surely?

Reply
Deex
18/4/2019 10:13:25 pm

Is it possible to schedule an erection?

Reply
Phil
28/4/2019 12:42:47 pm

You can – I've got one booked in for a week on Tuesday.

Anyway, I came here to say 'Unscheduled Erection' is a great band name. I like to think they'd sound like the Carpenters.

Reply
Anon
15/8/2021 10:41:35 pm

Do you remember Mega Stores?
Hahaha

Reply
MM
18/7/2022 06:00:41 pm

“Feces” looks so weird with the extra A in it

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    This section will not be visible in live published website. Below are your current settings:


    Current Number Of Columns are = 2

    Expand Posts Area =

    Gap/Space Between Posts = 12px

    Blog Post Style = card

    Use of custom card colors instead of default colors = 1

    Blog Post Card Background Color = current color

    Blog Post Card Shadow Color = current color

    Blog Post Card Border Color = current color

    Publish the website and visit your blog page to see the results

    Picture
    Support Me on Ko-fi
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    RSS Feed Widget
    Picture

    Picture
    Tweets by @mrbiffo
    Picture
    Follow us on The Facebook

    Picture

    Archives

    December 2022
    May 2022
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    November 2020
    September 2020
    July 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014


    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • MAIN PAGE
  • Features
  • Videos
  • Game Reviews
  • FAQ