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10 REASONS THE PLAYSTAtION WAS OVERRATED

10/5/2017

69 Comments

 
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The PlayStation then. Undoubtedly an important and popular console, but also... also... a really horrible one. Sorry... but it needs to be said. Don't give me that face; you know it to be true.

Being there, as a games journalist at the launch of the machine - at seeing a brand new epoch unfurling before my eyes - was a weird experience, not least because I never got the fuss.

The PlayStation always felt like a triumph of marketing and PR more than anything. It succeeded in branding, at making a games console a must-have lifestyle item, at ushering in the future of gaming - and it was 3D. Sony's messaging crushed everything in its path, like a corporate behemoth wearing a couple of steam engines for shoes.

There were lots of good games on the PS1 to be sure, but many of the system's alleged "classics" sailed through on a wave of euphoric hype. Furthermore, they have aged poorly - far worse than most Mega Drive and Super NES games.

It was a time when everything became polygons, and the technology simply wasn't advanced enough to do justice to the vision of its creators. Throw into that a godawful joypad, and you had a lot of games that were, frankly, difficult to play, and even more horrible to look at it.

In the interests of casting a revealing light onto history, here are ten overrated PS1 titles.
LEGACY OF KAIN: SOUL REAVER
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Imagine Tomb Raider starring an unlikeable try-hard goth, and set in a post-apocalyptic fantasy world, and you have Soul Reaver - the second game in an astonishing five-game series.

I mean, if you intend to alienate your players with anything remotely resembling the world they live in, or wish to ensure there's absolutely nothing endearing or appealing for them to latch onto, Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver is the perfect template. 

Raziel, the protagonist of Soul Reaver, is some sort of vampire/wraith guy, and one of - if not the - most poorly designed video game characters of all time. From his horrific snood, to his physical proportions - a size-zero waist coupled to Popeye-style arm-and-leg tumours - he's a bewildering design, the sort of thing a 14 year-old would scrawl in the back of a geography copy book.

Furthermore, the overwrought story and dialogue was the video game equivalent of that same teenager painting their bedroom walls black, and filling a journal with self-indulgent poetry.

Of course, everyone overlooked the game's many, many failings because, y'know, it was a 3D platformer-hack-'em-up... and that was exciting, apparently.
FINAL FANTASY VII
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Yeah. That's right. You hear that sound? That's me blasting your sacred cow between the udders with a twin-barrel shotgun.

What did people like about Final Fantasy VII? Frankly, I've no idea, and I loathe the fact that I bought into everyone else's excitement, and contributed a favourable review on Digitiser, despite my subconscious whispering... "But the Emperor... he wears no clothes!".

I forced myself through this scarcely-interactive experience, occasionally pressing X to make something happen, suffering its obscure and unfathomable storyline, trying so hard to discover what it was that people were liking... While simultaneously convincing myself that I was enjoying it. Once again, it seems as if everyone was blinded by the "3D" - mostly pre-rendered - visuals.

Ohhh... it was all grown-up and emotional, they said. Yeah, if overwrought, daytime soap opera-levels of melodrama are your high watermark of dramatic writing.
GRAN TURISMO
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Gran Turismo? Gran is right - it had all the pace and thrills of pushing your grandmother's wheelchair around Lidl. Sold to us as the pinnacle of all racing games, Grand Turismo was drier than a sandpaper sub, and more tedious than attempting to remove a splinter from your palm using a spoon.
WIPEOUT
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Appropriately a launch title, Wipeout signified so much that was true about the PlayStation: a perfect example of style over substance. The controls were nightmarishly oversensitive, but - hey - that didn't matter, because of those cool icons and that rave soundtrack and that. 
RESIDENT EVIL
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Aside from the fact that nobody cared or mentioned that it was a shameless rip-off of Alone in the Dark, the original Resident Evil had hideously long loading times between rooms, laborious controls, a ridiculous inventory system, and yearning chasms between save points. Also, how we ever forgave that godawful translation is anyone's guess...

"It's a weapon. It's really powerful, especially against living things."

"I'm going to find out what caused Forest's death. It looks like he was killed by a crow or something!"

"Where’s everyone going? Bingo?"
SPYRO THE DRAGON
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I hesitated to put this in, simply because my youngest daughter loved it.

But c'mon... the Nintendo 64 gave us Mario, and the PlayStation gave us... this? It was fine, in the most mediocre way imaginable, but also incredibly easy, and incredibly repetitive. Admittedly, those are two things that kids like, but Nintendo somehow managed to appeal to kids while also offering a challenge. Spyro was dumbed down to the point of being a vegetable.

Insanely, the soundtrack was written by Stewart Copeland from The Police. Who is, of course, most six year-old's favourite musician.
RIDGE RACER
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One track. Yes: a racing game with one track. And nobody - apart from Digitiser - ever said anything, because they were all too blinded by how good it looked and played.

I can't deny those two truths, but once you've been round that track forwards and backwards a couple of times... then what? Then what do you do, hmm? I mean, apart from show it to your friends and family, and drone on about how arcade-perfect it was? Newsflash: everyone normal thought you were boring!
STAR WARS: REBEL ASSAULT II
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Admittedly, Rebel Assault II received fairly lacklustre reviews, but it sold like hot jimmies. At a time when we hadn't had new live action Star Wars for 12 years, the Rebel Assault games were sort of exciting for fans of Star Wars... but what a horrific mess they were.

To be fair, the FMV-mixed-with-live-actors was a pretty reasonable facsimile of the movies... but like so many FMV games it fell apart when it came to the actual gameplay. Aiming with the horrible PlayStation controller was more trial and error than anything.
FINAL FANTASY VIII
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Yeah, I put this in here as well. Also awful, for all the same reasons as Final Fantasy VII. It was another impenetrable story, with plot twists that are seemingly generated at random, and characters who have all the depth and backstory of a fag packet health warning.

VIII is somewhat less fondly-remembered than VII, presumably for the fact that by the time it came out everyone was starting to question what they ever liked about its predecessor.
ODDWORLD: ABE'S ODDYSEE
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Do you like platformers? Do you like them to be slow, ponderous, and set in a dark, depressing world, where it's more about using your brain to solve deeply repetitive puzzles than, y'know, doing platforming? Then you probably loved Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee.

Like Soul Reaver, I just couldn't get past the aesthetics here, and was rendered bewildered by how popular it was. It didn't help that the title itself even grated. Oddysee? ODDYSEE?!? What does that even mean?

What really killed the game was its difficulty, and a save system which forced you to repeat the same teeth-grindingly tough sections over and over and over.
FROM THE ARCHIVE:
​A TRIBUTE TO THE PLAYSTATION - BY MR BIFFO
​
A TRIBUTE TO THE ATARI VCS - BY MR BIFFO
​
A TRIBUTE TO THE MEGA DRIVE - BY MR BIFFO
69 Comments
rocko
10/5/2017 10:08:43 am

FF7 was simply awful. I loathed it. Every-time I wanted to go out on an adventure, I would get random battles with that stupid music popping up, completely destroying any sense of immersion in the world. Wipeout was a great game though and RE was at the time. As you point out though many of them have simply aged awfully.

What I disliked the most about the PS1 was how it became trendy to game and spawned a new and huge generation of casual, instant gratification gamers, we are still paying the price for that today with games( particularly on console) continuing to pander for the lowest common denominator.

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PeskyFletch
11/5/2017 01:30:54 pm

YOU ARE SIMPLY AWFUL!

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Terragher
10/5/2017 10:41:14 am

Gaming finally became mainstream. What a time. Notice how grubby all the pictures above look ?

The only one of the above I even remotely enjoyed was Ridge Racer - but even that got tiresome when something in my brain clicked and it felt like I was steering the track around a stationary car.

I got disproportionately angry when people said wipeout had a great soundtrack too.

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Rich
10/5/2017 10:41:28 am

Can remember the PlayStation craze

I had friends that had never owned a console buying into the trendy lifestyle advertising.

They put it in mens mags like Maxim and Loaded. IIRC, pictures of it in trendy loft apartments in front of a large TV.

Not sure I agree with your list though. My Brother owned a Play Station. I loved Abe's Oddysee. I had fun on Ridge Racer, and I don't normally play racing games. Only played Resi when remastered on GameCube, not sure if it was the same experience? Loved it though and bought it again recently for PS4.

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DEAN
10/5/2017 10:55:32 am

You animal!

The first version of the pad was actually great, I thought. It definitely took them until the PS4 to get the analogue sticks right, though.

I don't disagree with you but fuck...... fuck...... oh fucking hell.... I love Ridge Racer. At least it was the start of something amazing! I look at it like those hot little buttered farts you make before having a fantastic shit.

Boring?! Here's a true story - when I was younger I always had two things on the go - headphones playing anything so long as it was Guns N Roses and a Gameboy.
We went on a family holiday to the South of France and I spent all of it as I described. On the ferry home my dad had a heart-to-heart with me - "All you do is play on that fucking thing when all this beauty is around you. Stop and look around...."
I looked up and said, facetiously but honestly, "yeah, it looks nice."
He shook his head and said (verbatim), "Son, you're a boring cunt".

I wish Ridge Racer would get back to what made it so very special AND on the PS4 - I'd buy a Pro and 4k TV for that... Boring? Pffft.

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Scott C
10/5/2017 11:44:43 am

You are correct about all of these games except Gran Turismo; it was truly revolutionary. 10/10 at Edge etc.

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Paddy Hill
10/5/2017 11:46:01 am

i still love you but .... ffvii ... dissed ....! I still have my memories at least - it was the first game the totally sucked me in (steady!) and i love it for that if nothing else :)

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John Aids
10/5/2017 12:19:55 pm

You've lost the plot Biffo.
Of course the games have aged badly. But twenty years ago, the PSX (as literally nobody was calling it) was only slightly behind the N64 in terms of quality. At the time, the majority of games on this list were some of the finest you could buy.
You really are worse than me, and I've had a disease named after me.

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Alastair
11/5/2017 01:33:25 pm

I took my N64 out for a quick session a few weeks ago.

I got motion sickness so badly I put it on Gumtree almost immediately.

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Rik link
10/5/2017 12:33:31 pm

Crikey Biffo, you've aimed your sights at a few beloved titles here!

Apart from a week playing Metal Gear Solid, I think 99% of my PlayStation time was spent with Pro Evolution Soccer. I didn't mind the odd game of split screen Gran Turismo but could never get on with the single player. Grand Boreismo...

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Spiney O'Sullivan
10/5/2017 01:02:53 pm

I have twice started FF7, got bored, and never finished it. I was also very much an "anything but Sony" zealot in that era (I now own a PSone, PS2 and slim, have had three PS3s due to crappy build quality, and currently have a PS4). As such I never experienced FF7 until a good few years after it was out, and don't hold any particular love for it.

HOWEVER;

I think you really have to look at it in context. We know that it did little that other RPGs hadn't already done beyond being prettier (Chrono Trigger is still better in my opinion, but had nowhere near the cultural impact of FF7), but nobody "normal" was playing RPGs before the PlayStation. For the first time, some of the non-nerdy kids in my school classes owned a JRPG. That was huge.

The writing is absolutely standard JRPG fare, but again, this is something that many people playing it wouldn't have really experienced if this was their first JRPG. To them this was the first time a game was telling anything even resembling an actual story.

Also, no Croc? People online seem to have fond memories of it, but their memories are lies, possibly brought on by the trauma of playing Croc. Good soundtrack, though.

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PeskyFletch
11/5/2017 01:34:47 pm

I HAVE TWICE STARTED TO REPLY TO YOU, GOT BORED AND FINISHED YOU!

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Rik link
10/5/2017 01:08:59 pm

Mr Biffo definitely speculated about the size of Croc's willy vs that of Hollywood actor Bruce Willis in a review for PC Zone. Fact!

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Panda
10/5/2017 01:11:57 pm

I was so close to getting a PS One as a teenager but Electronics Boutique tried to con me out of a SNES with all its best games for a shocking £90 credit towards a Playstation with no games. Instead, I got a far better deal at an indy shop against an N64 shortly after its premature price cut.

Even until recent years, it was a case of quantity over quality when I looked at Sony's platforms against Nintendo's. I wasn't a pirate and I didn't have any income so two or three good games a year on Nintendo machines was far less of an issue than nowadays, especially when those games pushed so many boundaries and got so much right first time.

In fact, for me, it wasn't until the latter half of the PS3's life that Sony's first party studios, and most third party ones, started to match Nintendo's output in terms of quality and ambition rather than attempting to out-do them with mere "mature" content or tone. Before then I'd be hyped for games on all sorts of platform but I'd struggle to place anything that wasn't Nintendo in my top two or three of each generation.

Not so now, and far from being a poor reflection on the history of Sony gaming, which still delivered enough in terms of unique and interesting ideas to make up for its shortcomings in terms of quality, I felt that view was more of an indictment on Nintendo dropping the ball a bit too often since the Wii's launch. But it's also a positive reflection on other studios of today, both third party and rival first party, who I felt had finally nailed gaming in 3D environments after what I'd regard as over two whole generations of being leagues behind.

With the Playstation, it felt like smoke and mirrors (or FMV and CD quality sound) versus proper revolutionary 3D gameplay and controls. Such wood-for-trees syndrome was present for decades before but I felt that solidified things even more. Maybe in addition to ushering in the mature/juvenile era of mainstream game content, its legacy also includes the obsession with resolution and framerate and all the teraflaps in between rather than good game design.

In short, now I feel like Sony's platforms can deliver on both quality and quantity, and they'd have to mess up big style for me not to consider whatever comes after the PS4.

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Zod
10/5/2017 01:12:45 pm

FVII a bad game? Nope, not having that one for a second. The game was massive (3 discs, no less!) and there was loads that you could do in the game but didn't have to do to complete it. It was sort of map mopping before map mopping became a thing. I think that's one of the main reasons it was loved (nobody loved it for the dreadful polygon characters without mouths!).

Take that out and put Destruction Derby in its place. I downloaded that on the PS3 (nostalgia, yeah?) and can confirm it's a huge, stinking turd. Even the menu screen was dreadful! I've no idea why it was 'big' at the time.

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rocko
10/5/2017 03:53:54 pm

FF7 was shite, pure and simple.

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PeskyFletch GETTING REALLY ANGRY NOW
11/5/2017 01:37:54 pm

YOU'RE SHIT! CONVOLUTED AND PERVERTED SHIT!

Darcy
10/5/2017 01:14:12 pm

Now imagine if Square had used the story from Xenogears as the basis for FF7, instead of making it its own thing...

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Jim Leighton (Future World Darts Champion) x
10/5/2017 01:35:43 pm

The Final Fantasy mentions make me sad.... Final Fantasy IX deserved to be in that list but VII and VIII?!?

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Fat Dave
10/5/2017 07:31:40 pm

FFIX was the best PlayStation final fantasy full stop. 7+8 have aged horribly.

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Jim Leighton (Future World Darts Champ) x
10/5/2017 09:14:18 pm

Nuh-uh!!

PESSKYNGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
11/5/2017 01:38:48 pm

YOU'VE AGED HORRIBLY!

Sven
10/5/2017 01:37:13 pm


Backwards and then forwards, forwards and then backwards
Ridge Racer is the racer who loves to muscle in
That's about the time the crowd all shout the name of 'Racer
As he's kotcheled in the corner, laughing by the bass bin

'Ridge racer Goode 'Ridge racer Goode He's Ridge racer Goode.

Admittedly I enjoyed it when it came out but it really has aged like an old pair of pants that you wear every day and never wash.

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MONKEYMANBOB
10/5/2017 01:37:52 pm

I fucking loathed Gran Tourismo and hated every minute of trying to get a license instead of you know, racing.

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RichardM
10/5/2017 02:43:05 pm

Ach, I like FF7. It's really just more of the same after the SNES games with different presentation. It isn't world-alteringly brilliant, but it's cheerful and the mad story is pretty fun. The Materia system is novel too. Hated FF8, though. The setting, the characters, the combat system: all guff.

Couldn't agree more with the rest of the list. Wish you'd put Metal Gear Solid on too, it's ugly and impenetrably difficult to control.

Stuff the PlayStation, N64 was best.

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Nin
10/5/2017 03:40:14 pm

Bloody hell

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sleepydays
10/5/2017 04:02:27 pm

I don't know if I've ever gotten as angry at a game as I did with FFVII....I got just a little lost at one point and kept getting pulled into battles every two seconds. This went on for about twenty minutes before I turned off the console spitting feathers and never went back. Awful bastard of a thing...it's put me off JRPGs forever.

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Spiney O'Sullivan
10/5/2017 08:04:36 pm

Get Chrono Trigger, it's great. No random battles, for one thing!

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sleepydays
10/5/2017 08:44:07 pm

Ah! I will take a look-see.

Spiney O'Sullivan
10/5/2017 09:11:08 pm

I'm currently playing it on iOS after last playing it about 15 years ago. I realised that I had forgotten enough of it that it seemed new again.

I think Lunar Silver Star Saga (also on iOS) might also have had visible enemies that you could avoid. I much prefer RPGs that way. Random battles are like trying to read a book with someone poking you in the eyes every now and then.

Col. Asdasd
12/5/2017 09:08:31 am

I'm playing throught FF6 at the moment, another crazily overrated and overpraised entry in the series (seriously, it's not a patch on something like Breath of Fire II).

I was wondering if I just had to 'be there' to properly understand the games merit in the context of its time. But then I remembered how I didn't play Chrono Trigger until something like ten years after its release and it completely blew me away. That was definitely a much, much better RPG than anything of the other wildly overpraised crap Square has ever put out.

RAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
11/5/2017 01:41:10 pm

YOU'RE AN AWFUL BASTARD OF A THING! YOU'VE PUT ME OFF BOTH SLEEPING AND DAYS FOREVER

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RG
10/5/2017 04:24:56 pm

I agree with this entirely - I was a PC gamer at the time and never felt that I was missing out on PSX titles and I've never seen a JRPG that looks like my idea of fun. It was PS2 era that I started to glance over my shoulder a little...

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Wicked Eric
10/5/2017 04:39:45 pm

PISH

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Jol
10/5/2017 04:48:08 pm

Ah, Rebel Assault II. What a steaming pile of poo. It was one of a handful of games I got with a Playstation when I traded in my Saturn, thinking it was Dark Forces. Not that PS1 Dark Forces was nearly as good as the PC version, but at least you could run around. Rebel Assault II was a weird on-rails FMV shambles. The shoot-outs with stormtroopers were at least just a crap version of Time Crisis, but the flying sections were a marvel in terrible control schemes. The 'movement' controls required you to aim your targeting reticule at the edges of the screen to force your ship to move in that direction, although it only worked half the time and even then felt like an illusion.

I recall a particularly awful mission where you're flying about an asteroid field and have to dodge asteroids by pointing one way, but there'd be stuff to shoot at the other side of the screen at the same time. It was like trying to rub your belly and pat your head at the same time with only one hand.

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Swift Ken Prince
10/5/2017 04:56:02 pm

At last somebody brave enough to tell the truth, I really loved my psx but to this day in fail to see how ff7 gets all dat love,i bought it upon realise in 97,I really wanted to love it as everyone else did,I just didn't get it,is felt like it was me playing it wrong. I finally gave up on it and gave it to my 2nd cousin,he told me it was the greatest game ever programed,I recently paid said 2nd cousin a vist,he said if your not busy check out my allotment,well when we got to his patch and saw his vegetables I noticed some cds hanging from wires to scare birds,well amongst the Now56's and newspaper freebies was 3 disc'so of final fantasy 7,shows how much it really mend to him.

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NDrinks
10/5/2017 09:31:51 pm

Did he not notice the bottom of Playstation discs were black?

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Swift Ken prince
11/5/2017 07:07:20 am

That's a bit racist isn't it?

PeskyFletch
11/5/2017 02:10:56 pm

YOU WERE PLAYING IT WRONG!

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Meatballs-me-branch-me-do
10/5/2017 05:16:48 pm

Biffo, you've gone full edgelord here.

You cuss out Ridge Racer for being too light on content, and then cuss out Gran Turismo for not having enough?

Gran Turismo was superb! The licence thing was silly until you got it over with, but it wasn't boring - provided you played long enough to buy something beyond the Mazda Demio you started with. Later games went too berserk (GT2 in particular was excessive in ever respect) but the original remains perfect.

I admire you having the stones to say that Legacy of Kain (or "Alain" as autocorrect would have it) was stupendously ugly and impenetrable, and Oddworld likewise.

Final Fantasy... I just don't understand at all. I recently bought the iOS version of FFIV to play during my commute and it is excruciatingly contrived. Minor spoilers, but it should be no surprise that the hero, Cecil, is an angst ridden "dark knight" who folds his arms and looks away moodily after each battle. About a quarter of the way through, he is freed from the darkness and becomes an angst ridden pretty boy, with long flowing hair. You get attacked at random almost constantly. The serious plot about people dying and the world being in danger is completely undermined by the right graphics and ludicrous characters who look like they should be on some jolly adventure through candy land.

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Mr Biffo
10/5/2017 08:59:54 pm

Never cussed GT for not having enough content... Just that it was crushingly dull!

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Meatballs-me-branch-me-do
11/5/2017 05:16:27 pm

That's a typo, I meant "too much".

PEEVEDPESKYFLETCH
11/5/2017 02:12:56 pm

YOU DIDN'T UNDERSTAND IT CAUSE YOU'RE NOT A MORALLY SOUND ENOUGH PERSON! YOU BELONG IN PRISON

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mrak
10/5/2017 06:04:20 pm

What's your best time in time attack mode?

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Trevor Cod
10/5/2017 06:53:28 pm

But Gran Tourismo had dirty air! Two player Grand valley, final chicane, final lap, in the slipstream of the car in front catching him up, you'd lose grip on the corner just like the real racy cars and lose traction. Dirty Air! We would shout.
Please tell me someone else did that too.

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Spiney O'Sullivan
10/5/2017 08:24:41 pm

Gran Turismo is Mario Kart for trainspotters.

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James D.
10/5/2017 07:42:15 pm

Nice one, Mr. Biffo. I loathed the Final Fantasy games from day one and was baffled at their popularity. It was pushing a button occasionally to watch a poorly-drawn and cliched cartoon. The graphics looked like a lego playset filmed through gauze.

On the other hand, the terrible, TERRIBLE dialogue was one of the best bits of Resident Evil. Honestly, rather than being a flaw, it's unintentional hilarity what made it stand out. Like a turd in a toddler's ball pit.

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ARUNAHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
11/5/2017 02:13:53 pm

I'VE LOATHED YOU FROM DAY 1!

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Monkey Head
12/5/2017 11:39:39 pm

My friend's daughter did a turd in a ball pit immediately before a party of kids in what I assume we're communion dresses (white and flouncy) arrived. The results certainly stood out when the dresses found it before we could.

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Guy Fella
10/5/2017 08:44:54 pm

The flying missions in Spyro were unreasonably challenging. Are you some Spyro savant, or is the PAL version different, or....?

Also, the PS1 gave the world Tomba and Klonoa. Which were commercial flops, granted, but we're not cyncical enough for that to matter. Hahaha...........right?

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Spiney O'Sullivan
10/5/2017 09:13:49 pm

Klonoa is hands-down my favourite PlayStation 1 game. It's magical, and actually one of the games that tempted me to the dark side back when I was very much an anti-Sony zealot.

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Darren
10/5/2017 09:45:03 pm

Crash Bandicoot was terrible too. I'm not sure why people are getting so excited about the remake for PS4, sure the graphics will look nice, but it's the same shit game underneath.

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PS1Snake
11/5/2017 02:12:43 am

I bet a few people here were moved to tears by the violent murder of FF7's innocent flower merchant.

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Jim Leighton (Future World Darts Champ) x
11/5/2017 07:31:11 am

I'm not afraid to say I did

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Col. Asdasd
12/5/2017 09:15:45 am

It's the music. The music in that scene is wielded against the player's emotions like a sledge hammer to the fun nuggets.

I mean, you have to hand it to the composer, because it's a masterful soundtrack. But, like a sex offender in a maserati, it'd be too much to claim that the good wholly redeemed the bad..

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b8 m8
11/5/2017 07:56:04 am

Ugh, I can't believe I clicked this. I feel like a sucker

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Biscuits
11/5/2017 08:04:48 am

I was hoping this would be the site where people just like games of all sorts, but it seems we are continually buying into the tedious 'nintendo=creativity and beauty and other companies = faceless corporate behemoths people were tricked into liking' subtext that infects so much nostalgia-blinded gaming journalism these days. I guess it's good for clicks?

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Spiney O'Sullivan
11/5/2017 04:30:25 pm

I think gaming as a whole would be much worse off without Nintendo, but I also find the general deification of the company difficult to justify. They've released their share of samey games (Mario Party 10368, anyone?), pissed off a good few developers and partners over the years (probably shouldn't have a canned the Nintendo PlayStation), confounded consumers by remaining obstinately backwards about online gaming and digital distribution, demonstrated an almost wilful inability to adequately supply in-demand products to the point that they might as well include eBay scalpers in their official supplier list, and almost totally ignored the existence of Europe for decades. I also don't think that a market without Sony and Microsoft ever would have made gaming as mainstream as it is today, as Nintendo's refusal to do anything mature and Sega's inability to exist outside the radical 90s would have stunted the industry without competition that focused on bringing back people who had turned away from games in their teens/20s. We'd likely never have got mature games with quality like The Last of Us, Uncharted, Tomb Raider, and Grand Theft Auto and assorted other major franchises in a world with only those two running the console game.

Also to be fair to some of these games, there are a few points I disagree on:

Abe's Oddysee is difficult and depressing and more of a puzzle game than a platformer. That's not necessarily a bad thing, just different. I quite like its brutally satirical world.

Gran Turismo is to me unimaginably boring, but to 90s lads, it was the ultimate Top Gear-style car anorak experience to play while waiting for the next issue of Nuts to come out. Nintendo and Sega certainly weren't going to provide that.

Soul Reaver played well for a 3D platformer in that era, and Raziel is awesome.

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Biscuits
11/5/2017 07:23:29 pm

Don't get me wrong, I love Nintendo, but I love Sega and Sony and even Microsoft. In particular I think Sony have taken risks and thrown money at some very risky and esoteric titles. Other than a few sequels, literally everything their Japan studio alone has produced is strange and notable for a crazy new mechanic or groundbreaking feature. Don't believe me? I don't blame you, but check it out, Sidney:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SIE_Japan_Studio

In the west you're looking at stuff like Naughty Dog and Santa Monica, responsible for no end of weird indie stuff, including Flower and Journey,and, er...The Order: 1886 .

Yeah Sony brought gaming to the masses, but as you rightly point out, that widened the scope for games immeasurably.

Arsenal Fan TV
11/5/2017 09:15:11 am

WENGER OUT

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colincidence link
12/5/2017 04:56:20 pm

I always wonder when you mention - what's so bad about the Playstation controller?

It seems really logical; it takes the SNES pad and adds grips that presumably make it more comfortable for humans to hold, and two buttons where human fingers would go anyway. I think I would call it a good pad, but tbh basically every controller ever wrecks my carpals after a few minutes these days (for I am 26).

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Spiney O'Sullivan
13/5/2017 01:52:42 am

I've always found the PlayStation pad to be incredibly comfortable. It just sort of fit nicely in the hands, neither too big nor small. The original pad's lack of analogue sticks was annoying, but quickly rectified, and the fact it survived nearly unchanged for two generations suggests that it did something right.

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Jareth Smith
17/5/2017 09:21:48 am

The PlayStation controller is just horrendous - like a mushkin cat. Stubby controller prongs and just uncomfortable to be around in general.

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Chris Dyson
13/5/2017 08:37:23 am

I loved wipeout. My favourite bands are Dollar and The Doolies so it wasn't because of the trendy rave soundtrack. It was just a good video game.

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Jareth Smith
17/5/2017 09:19:29 am

The PlayStation brought in the concept of "mature gaming" which hit the mainstream. The problem with this is, there's nothing mature about Lara Croft and her huge breasts, ultra-violent games where you just gun everyone down, story-led games with endless cut-scenes, and gimmicky FMV sequences.

The PS did have some amazing games (FFVII and Metal Gear), but the majority of its catalogue has aged terribly badly. It genuinely is a console which just thrives of nostalgia - people who made the mistake of choosing this over a SNES/N64 and thinking Nintendo's exceptional consoles can't match up as they're "for kids".

Sony certainly revolutionised the industry, but it's led to the stale, tedious mainstream industry of today where we're plagued with CoD and GTA clones. What we do these days is sit through gaming experiences, forced to watch atrocious movie/games before being prompted with a few hand holding game segments. I think Mass Effect Andromeda sums this up pretty perfectly.

Anyway, Sony does some good as the PS2 had some excellent games and the PS4, although it's taken almost 5 years, almost has a great selection of exclusives to pick from. But it's Steam and the Switch which I'll be paying attention to.

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News Smash
6/3/2022 01:40:42 pm

Why PlayStation is Everything wrong with Modern Gaming.

Sony started the Racist comments in FPS games.

Sony started Loot Boxes.PlayStation 2 Was the earliest console to feature Loot Boxes.

64DD had a Marketplace where you could buy or sell and PlayStation did not.

PlayStation was Created by a Man who had an unhealthy obsession with money.

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News Smash
9/6/2022 06:52:42 pm

Reasons Final Fantasy 7 Is TERRIBLE (And Everyone Is Plain Wrong)

The Graphics Are Atrocious
Via YouTube.com (Cycu1)
Final Fantasy VII's graphics are rough. Everybody has squares for hands. People sometimes just don't have mouths. Those FMV chicks at Mt. Corel look weird! And it's not like the PS1 wasn't capable of delivering way better. Look at Final Fantasy VIII! If you put Squall and Cloud next to each other, you'd think one was a soldier, and one was a Super Mario character that hadn't eaten a mushroom yet. The characters that appear in the cutscenes look NOTHING like the ones you're actually controlling. Cloud has a belt? Tifa's wearing earrings? Wait, one of these characters is just a cat sitting on a mog? Oh, right. Okay. My bad, I knew that last one.

Materia Is Extremely Limiting
via: deviantart.com (calicostonewolf)
Over time, Mako reactors make rocks. These rocks get really hard and cool. Then, you can put them in your weapons, even though the only weapon that actually seems to have slots for them is Cloud's Buster Sword. This is Materia, AKA colorful rocks.

While learning the Materia system is simple enough, it's also cripplingly limiting. For the sake of contrast, consider Final Fantasy X's sphere grid. It's amazing. Every character in your party could learn every spell in the game if you really want them to. Materia offers none of that potential. It's a piece of rock you put in a weapon slot and level up till it's done, or you "master" it. And guess what you get when you master it? Another piece of the same dumb rock, except this time, unleveled up. Why exactly does Yuffie want this stuff so bad?

The Gold Saucer Games Are Terrible
via: youtube.com (UCJvLY6_TlNuyIgvdPoLo7yQ)
Let's be straightforward about this: all these mini-games are terrible. Trust me. They are awful. Let's quickly run down a few of the main offenders:

3D Battler: This is basically a game of rock, paper, scissors you will definitely lose. It's like Street Fighter 2, if Street Fighter 2 was replaced with a game of rock, paper, scissors. Fun.

G-Bike: Remember that annoying part earlier in the game where you had to protect a truck full of your friends from getting killed by riding alongside them in a motorcycle and flailing tirelessly at bad guys with your sword? Wanna do that again, but this time, with the potential to win a whole 10 GP? Me neither.

Mog House: This one is the absolute worst. It's basically a cutscene about a Mog trying to find love. PRO TIP: If the Mog looks hungry, feed him. If he doesn't, stop. How do they come up with this stuff?

The Fort Condor Mission Is Pointless
via: youtube.com (mackenzy123)
In theory, the Fort Condor mission is really cool. Another mini-game of sorts, it's a strategy game plopped right in the middle of FF7's open world map. You purchase soldiers and place them along the mountain to try and defend it from oncoming Shinra forces. There's just one problem: there's no reason to do it. Even if you do nothing, you'll just get the Phoenix summon Materia anyway. So why even do it? Just to dust off those old strategy game skills you've been keeping in your back pocket since you put away Starcraft II?

Side note: it's fun to go to Fort Condor with Aeris in your party, and then when they ask for help, tell them no. She gets really mad at you for not wanting to help people in need. Calm down, lady, I promise I'll come back on disc two. Unless you think something might come up for you before then?

Barret Wallace Is A Racist Stereotype
via: ffvii-remake.net/
In some ways, Barret represents a real step forward in the Final Fantasy series. He is the first black character to appear in the series, and is a pivotal part of the story, with a fully fleshed out, dynamic, and interesting back story. Counterpoint, he looks like he is based on Mr. T from The A-Team, swears constantly, and speaks in what seems to be some kind of Japanese impression of African American slang.

It's not that there aren't positives to Barret, and future iterations of the character have toned down the racist elements that plagued his first appearance (his role in Advent Children, for example). It will be interesting to see how Square chooses to portray him in the upcoming Final Fantasy 7 remake.

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News Smash
1/11/2022 10:27:30 pm

Horrible video games based off the ps1:

Bad: Dirge Of Cerberus: Final Fantasy VII
Via binarymessiah.wordpress.com
Dirge is the correct word. This spinoff is frankly terrible, and most Final Fantasy fans would rather forget it exists. You play as Vincent Valentine, a character from FFVII that you probably forgot, and meander your way through his dull story. And boy, is it dull. The game throws long cutscene after long cutscene at you, interspersing it with astonishingly dated FPS gameplay. It was dated when the game came out, with stupid AI the least of its issues. If you've never played FFVII, you won't understand a thing, if you have, you'll hate it.

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News Smash
1/11/2022 10:40:41 pm

PlayStation 1 aftermath

PlayStation 3 commercals

Why Most Of Them Sucked
Great part of these commercials are WAY too creepy and very disturbing.
They had nothing to do with the console. If you're gonna make a commercial this creepy, at least show some features of the PS3 like its Blu-ray capabilities or its Cell processor or its early backwards compatibility.
In relation with WMOTS #2, no games are shown in those commercials.
Those commercials are very confusing to the point of being able to make Serial Experiments Lain look like a Disney Junior show in comparison with them.
A few of them were just plain nasty and full of gross-out scenes.
The infamous commercial baby which is extremely creepy due to distorted voices and how uncanny valley and possessed the baby looks like.

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