We now all know that there's a new Nintendo console - the "NX" - in development, with Nintendo promising that it will boast a "brand new concept".
Suffice to say, such a promise has sent the speculators into overdrive - and we wait to see how the ranks of amateur and semi-pro console designers conceptualise their messed-up imaginations.
Indeed, it seems a key part of the console development cycle that, a year or two before the reveal of a new hardware, the Internet gets flooded with crazily fanciful takes on what the next generation will look like. Here are ten of our favourites from the last ride on the console hardware merry-go-round of optimism.
Suffice to say, such a promise has sent the speculators into overdrive - and we wait to see how the ranks of amateur and semi-pro console designers conceptualise their messed-up imaginations.
Indeed, it seems a key part of the console development cycle that, a year or two before the reveal of a new hardware, the Internet gets flooded with crazily fanciful takes on what the next generation will look like. Here are ten of our favourites from the last ride on the console hardware merry-go-round of optimism.
10. XBOX ONE/PS4Wii
That Xbox One concept is almost as boring as the one we got - so full marks for second-guessing the current trend for making console hardware as tedious to look at as possible. However, we don't entirely understand why the designer of this piece thought Sony would take inspiration from Nintendo for their PS4 design. The subtle curves, compact design, and blue light all scream "Wii". There's probably a joke in there about urinating in public places. Or there would be, if every variation on Wii/wee jokes hadn't been run into the ground. Much like our "Wii" runs into the ground when we urinate in our neighbour's garden. Hello!
9. PLAYSTATION TRON
Dull shape aside, we sort of like that neon light stretching across the front of tis mock-up; we're not so sure about the power and wi-fi button, which more evoke a broadband router than a games console. If this PS4 is anything like our broadband router, it'll seize to a halt every few minutes. Yeah, Sky Broadband - we're talking about YOU.
8. SAMSUNG XBOX 720
Samsung? Who knows what's going on here? This is clearly meant to be part of the same gene pool as the 360, but without everything that made the 360 semi-attractive. You know: like when you get a kid who looks like he's been brushed with the ugly broom, despite having passably good-looking parents.
7. XBOX CURVE
Congrats for pushing the envelope a bit in the direction of alien artefacts, but - let's face it - nobody ever designs things that look as interesting as they do in science fiction. In this tedious, Apple-sculpted world everything is all minimalist lines and no glowing neon - not bio-organic technology that looks like it wants to hump your face.
6. PS BOOMERANG
We don't have to hold that joypad to know it's completely unworkable. And we can't even work out what the console itself is meant to be. It looks like a velcro catch mitt for one of those beach ball games you get in seaside gift shops. You know the ones: they sell crab lines, and buckets, and postcards, and the floor is always covered in sand because people walk in there, right off the beach, in their bare feet. Disgusting.
5. PLAYSTATION GLASS
We're not sure the technology currently exists to create something like this. By which we mean... the technology to create sufficiently toughened glass that we wouldn't shatter the thing while we were attempting to unbox it.
4. XBOX TRILOBYTE
Again, we're in alien artefact territory. This bad boy looks like he's filled with Swarfega. Can you still buy that? If not, your dad probably has some in his shed. Go and look. We'll wait here while you do.
3. PLAYSTATION LIP
Three parts PS2 to one part tribal lip plate.
2. WII CURVE
It looks like a shiny, curved book. So shiny, in fact, that you can see your face in it. We're not sure if we want to see ourselves reflected in our console while we're sprawled on the sofa, double chins resting on our chest, bowl of Wotsits wedged precariously between stomach and crotch.
1. PLAYSTATION ANGULAR
In the first and second World Wars, the British and US navies painted their ships with 'dazzle' camouflage that made it difficult to make out their position, distance, or direction. That's what this PS4 design reminded me of - we actually find it quite hard to look at, as the lines don't conform to anything we've seen outside of one of those mirrors we regularly smash. THUGLIFE!
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